Tequila Sunrise
by greydayz
Summary: What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas or does it? MerDer
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own them.**

**This is a new fic I'm starting even though I haven't finished my other one. It's probably not a good idea to have two fics going at once, but I love Mer/Der and can't seem to stop writing about them.**

**_

* * *

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas – or does it? _**

Meredith and Cristina were standing by the nurse's station reviewing and talking over a patient's chart when a voice from behind interrupted them.

"Are you guys ready for our annual DATES?" asked the voice excitedly.

Rolling her eyes, Cristina turned around to face the intruder and said in an exasperated voice "Will you stop calling it that? We haven't used that name since med school and it's been four years since we graduated!"

Meredith leaned in towards Cristina, smiled and said "She still uses that name when you're not around."

"Well I think it's stupid and if it weren't for the booze and gambling, I wouldn't even bothering going," Cristina huffed, before grabbing the files into her arms and walking away.

"Izzie, you need to ease up on this. You know Cristina's been unhappy since she broke up with Adam." Meredith scolded her lightly.

Putting her arm around Meredith's shoulder, Izzie led her down the hallway and said "That is exactly why we need our DA…." She stopped abruptly when Meredith turned to give her a warning look.

Placing her hands up in surrender, she said "Fine. I will not mention the "D" word, but we need to pack tonight. Our flight to Vegas leaves at 10am tomorrow. Lauren and Sam will be flying in later so they'll call as soon as they arrive." Giving Meredith one last girlish grin, she turned on her heel and walked away. Meredith could hear her whistling the song "Viva Las Vegas" as she turned the corner and vanished.

Meredith couldn't help but smile at Izzie's excitement. Truth be told, she was looking forward to getting away for a couple of days. She'd been feeling a lot of pressure lately and need the time to get away and just breathe. Turning around and heading down the opposite hallway that Izzie vanished into, she started to reminisce about their med school days, remembering one night in particular.

It was Valentine's Day 2003. Meredith, Izzie, Cristina, Lauren and Sam were friends, who shared a home a few miles from Dartmouth where they attended college together. Meredith and Cristina never particularly cared for this day. In their minds, it was an overrated occasion that gave retailers reason to hike up prices on flowers and jewelry to bleed these poor unsuspecting boys and men out of their hard earned money. Spending exorbitant amounts of money to dine and wine in hopes that they'll get lucky and laid by their wives or significant others.

Needless to say, Meredith and Cristina did not have plans for Valentine's Day but Izzie, Lauren and Sam did. Well, they did until Lauren's boyfriend called to say he couldn't take her out for dinner because he lost all his money betting on a game. The guy Sam was dating broke things off when his real girlfriend from back home showed up unexpectedly at his doorstep. And then there's Izzie, who turned her boyfriend away when she realized it was more fun to stay at home with the "girls".

That night, they ate, gambled and drank themselves to a drunken stupor. And in the midst of their alcoholic drink fest, they swore off men and formed the Dark And Twisty Evil Sisterhood; otherwise known as DATES. This became their ritual every Valentine's Day and after they graduated med school, they decided to move their get-together to a place equally dark and twisty – Sin City, Las Vegas.

* * *

This years' get-together was only going to last through the weekend. Since they started their surgical residency, it was impossible for all three of them to have the same days off, so this year they agreed to make it a short weekend thing. 

It was after 2pm, by the time they arrived and checked into the hotel. They were staying at the Venetian since the rooms were all-suites which allowed the three of them to share a room. Meredith lost the coin toss so she was stuck with the pull-out bed while Cristina and Izzie each got a queen bed. Lauren and Sam called while they were busy unpacking to say they arrived and after a lengthy discussion had agreed to meet up at Pure Nightclub.

* * *

It was late by the time they arrived at the club. It was Friday night so Meredith was not surprised to see that it was already packed with couples, singles and lots of hot looking people. They found a table off to the side and taking orders for drinks, she and Cristina headed over to the bar. While they were waiting for their drink orders to be filled, two guys came up and began hitting on them. 

"Hey ladies. You two look too beautiful to be here alone."

Rolling her eyes, Cristina turned around and said "What makes you think we're here alone?"

"Well, if I had a girlfriend as hot as you two, I would _never_ let her out of my sight."

"How charming,' retorted Cristina sarcastically. "It's shocking that some poor unsuspecting woman hasn't snatched you up."

Leaning in, he whispered in a creepy tone "Well, we can change that. What's say you and your little girlfriend here join my buddy and I for drinks. We can get to know each other…better."

Laughing hysterically, Cristina turned to address him straight in the face. "Seriously? Do you seriously think a line like that will get you laid? My girlfriend and I are way too sophisticated and intelligent to waste time with you and your boyfriend over there," she said, gesturing towards the guy moving to hide behind his friend. "Now scurry back to the hole you came from and take your boy-penises with you."

The creepy guy stood, rooted to the spot as he was struggling to take in what Cristina had just said. Gathering their drinks, Cristina turned once again and said in an exasperated voice "Why are you still here? Go away. Now!"

The guy that was previously cowering behind the "creepy guy" pulled his friends arms and yanked him out of the club.

"Unbelievable. C'mon, let's get back to the table."

As they walked back to the table, Meredith lost her footing and nearly tripped. A pair of strong arms reached out and steadied her. Cursing silently to herself, she looked up and found herself staring into the deepest, bluest pair of eyes.

"I…uh…," she stuttered lamely.

"Are you okay?"

"I-I tripped and you caught me and…," she tried to explain the obvious. Meredith cringed at her blatant stupidity. The guy must think she's a complete idiot. So much for being 'sophisticated and intelligent' women.

Smiling when he saw that her cheeks had turned a deep red, he said "Yes. You fell and I caught you."

Meredith couldn't help but smile too. He had the most amazing blues eyes that seem to soften when he laughs. She felt his thumb stroke the underside of her arm and looking down, she saw that he still hadn't let go of her.

_Oh my god. Is there anything about this man that isn't hot? He's got the strong masculine arms, dark curly wavy hair that just screams to be touched, and the eyes. It's a crime to look this good and be allowed out in public. He looks like he'd be good in bed. Really, really good…_

Shaking her head to clear her not-so-pure thoughts of this stranger, she said "You can, um…let go of my arms now."

Not breaking eye contact with her, he smiled again and released her arms. Meredith didn't know why, but the simple act of removing his hands left her feeling cold and alone. Looking past him, she realized that Cristina was nowhere to be found.

"Th-thank you. I have to go. My friends are probably wondering where I am."

Nodding his head, he moved aside to clear a path for her. He leaned in so that his mouth was less than an inch from her ear and whispered "Be careful not to fall again. It would be an awful shame to hurt those lovely ankles of yours." He gave her yet another dreamy smile and walked away.

Meredith stood staring at his retreating back until he disappeared completely into the crowd. Taking a few deep breaths to regain her composure, she walked back to the table.

* * *

Derek was still smiling as he walked up to the bar. It took a lot of willpower to keep from turning around to see if she was still standing there. He was intrigued by her. She had a child-like quality about her that made him want to protect her as a brother would a sister. Although the thoughts that ran through his mind as he was holding her, was anything but brotherly. He liked how she felt in his arms, which was probably why he hesitated in letting her go. 

He was sitting in the corner booth with his friends, silently berating himself for allowing them to convince him to go to Vegas, let alone to this nightclub. He knew they meant well, but all he wanted to do was lock himself inside his Manhattan apartment and sulk at his mess of a life. He only conceded in the end because he knew that in a few weeks, Manhattan and all the painful memory it held would fade into nothingness. He was looking for a new start and it came in the form of a phone call from his former mentor.

He immediately noticed her as she walked in with her friends. She looked uncomfortable, which was what he noticed first since he too felt the same way. He sat there watching her as they found a table and she and a friend headed over to the bar. There was something about her that fascinated him and he found himself wondering if she was married or had a boyfriend. His smile dropped when he saw two men walk up to them. He prayed they would not be the boyfriends or husbands and soon realized it was not the case when her friend literally laughed them out of the club. Ouch!

Fate must have been on his side when this blond beauty _literally_ fell into his arms. His friends were getting a little too rowdy for his liking so he decided to step away and that was when it happened. He was heading outside for a breath of air when he heard a faint yelp and saw her teetering with two drinks in hand. Reaching out, he grabbed her just in time. The electricity that shot through him when he touched her left him a little breathless. Upon closer inspection, he realized that he was wrong with his previous assessment of her. She was more than beautiful. She was captivating. Everything about her was captivating – her eyes, her smile, her voice, her hair. The smell of her hair was intoxicating. It smelled of flowers or something.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	2. Chapter 2

Meredith's heart was still beating erratically by the time she returned to the table. She couldn't believe that a few minutes in this stranger's presence could make her feel so flustered.

"Where did you go off to?" asked Izzie, reaching over to take the drinks from her hands.

"I got lost in the crowd," she lied.

"You just missed some wonderful news," said Izzie, beaming from across the table.

"I did?"

"Sam's engaged!" Izzie squeaked, pulling Sam's hand toward her so she could see the ring.

"Congratulations Sam," said Meredith, moving around the table to give her a hug before returning to sit next to Cristina.

Lauren, Sam and Izzie began talking excitedly about the wedding and honeymoon plans. Cristina and Meredith sat there awkwardly watching the scene in front of them. Leaning in closer to Meredith, Cristina asked "Did you get McDreamy's number?"

"McWho?" she asked, confused.

"The hot guy you were talking to."

"Oh him…," she said, blushing.

"Yes him. Did you get his number?"

"No! I tripped and he kept me from falling, that's all," she said defensively. "And thanks for abandoning me, by the way."

"I did you a favor."

"How was that a favor?"

"Oh please. You need some excitement in your life. Ever since you started seeing what's-his-face, you've become boring just like him. A little sex with McDreamy could change that."

"Cristina!" she yelled.

"Fine. Whatever. Just remember that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas," she gave her a grin and turned back, pretending to be deeply interested in the conversation.

* * *

Derek sat at the bar waiting patiently for his drink to arrive. He was in no hurry to get back to his table after seeing that his friends had invited some girls to sit with them. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a blond moving towards him and looked over to see if it was his blond beauty. His face dropped slightly when he discovered that it wasn't. The blond smiled and came to sit down next to him. 

Extending her hand, she introduced herself "Hi, I'm Rebecca."

"Derek," he said, taking her hand and giving it a light shake.

"I noticed you aren't sitting with your friends," she said, smiling up at him.

"I wanted to be alone for a little bit," he said, hoping she would take the hint. He wasn't in the mood for any company. Actually, the only person he wanted company of was off sitting with her friends somewhere.

Moving closer, she said "I hope you don't mind my company."

Derek didn't want to be rude so he just smiled.

* * *

Meredith was bored. The wedding conversation was dragging on and since she had nothing to contribute, she stayed quiet. She started thinking about her mystery man and subconsciously began scanning the club for him. She spotted him at the bar, next to a very pretty blond. They were laughing at something he said and she saw the blond reach out to place a hand suggestively on his thigh. 

Now Meredith is not a violent person, by any means. She's a doctor and doctors save lives, but at that moment, all she wanted to do was reach across the room and yank the blonds' hand off her McDreamy. She sat watching them, hoping he would turn the blond away but sadly he didn't.

"C'mon, let's go," Cristina said, pulling at her arm.

"Where are we going?" she asked, not taking her eyes off the couple at the bar.

"We're going to Rum Jungle for a late dinner since we haven't eaten yet."

"Oh okay." She didn't want to leave. Not while the blond still had her claws on him.

Cristina lowered her voice so only Meredith could hear her. "Either go over there and save McDreamy from McSlutty's clutches and get the sex over with or let's go. I'm starving and need a change of scenery."

Finally able to tear her eyes away from them, she turned and said "I don't want to have sex with him. She can have him for all I care!"

Cristina gave her a disbelieving look and opened her mouth to give a smart-ass retort but thought better of it. She could tell her friend was distraught.

They gathered their stuff and began heading towards the exit. Derek caught sight of Meredith leaving and suddenly, he no longer had the desire to stick around. Gently removing Rebecca's hand from his thigh, he said "It was very nice meeting you Rebecca, but I have to be getting back to my friends."

She gave him a pouty look, but smiled and said goodbye. Derek had no intention of sticking around. He was going to tell his friends he was done for the night and head back to the hotel.

* * *

It was after 1pm by the time they woke up. They went to Rum Jungle and ate, drank and danced until the early morning hours. Meredith woke up to find that she was still wearing the dress from the previous night. Sitting up, she could see Cristina sprawled face down on the bed with her leg hanging off the edge, her strappy sandal hanging precariously on her toe. 

Sitting on the chair next to her reading a newspaper was Izzie. She was dressed in her pajamas with her hair tied up into a loose bun on her head. Looking up from the paper, she said "Good morning, Sunshine!"

"Ugh…you are _way_ too bright and shiny today," Meredith said, pulling the pillow over her head. "Why aren't you hung-over and miserable like the rest of us?" she asked with her head still buried beneath the pillow.

"Unlike the rest of you, I didn't go crazy with the tequila shots. Besides, someone had to be the responsible adult."

"Stop with the talking!" yelled Cristina from across the room.

They turned to see Cristina sitting upright on the bed, her hair a mass of tangled curls around her face.

"It's after 1pm and I'm hungry. Get your butts out of bed so we can go eat already" Izzie said, pulling Meredith out of bed and going over to Cristina.

"If you touch me, I will seriously hurt you."

Sticking out her tongue, Izzie smiled said "You know you love me."

"Perhaps, but I'll still hurt you now and regret it later," she grumbled. Turning to Meredith, she asked "Why did we let Barbie stay with us?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she walked into the bathroom and began to undress.

* * *

They didn't get out of the hotel until well past 3pm. They grabbed a quick bite to eat and did some gambling at the craps table to pass time by. Two hours later, after they exhausted themselves of all their money, they went to a bar at the Bellagio hotel to relax. 

"What do you guys think about going to Tao tonight to celebrate our Sammy's engagement? We can have a mini bachelorette party," suggested Izzie.

Meredith was a little tired of all the wedding talk, but she agreed to go. As long as there was alcohol, she didn't care what the reason for celebration was.

They left shortly to go back to their hotel to get ready. The club was already alive with people by the time they arrived. They drank and flirted outrageously with the men that approached them. Lauren ended up inviting a few guys back to their table. As the evening wore on, the guys got more and more rowdy. Cristina was no longer enjoying herself and stood up to leave.

"Where are you going?" asked Sam, disappointed that she was leaving.

Scanning the table, Cristina said "Sorry Sam. I have a headache and need to lie down."

Meredith could tell Cristina was not being completely truthful. Lauren and the guys she invited were making complete asses of themselves and she was annoyed. Meredith felt the same way and was looking for a way out.

"I'll come with you to make sure you're okay,' she said, standing up to move next to Cristina.

"Oh no, not you too!" said Sam, clearly distressed that they were leaving.

"We'll be okay. Don't ruin your night because of us," she said, hoping they'll let the subject drop so they could leave without any more fuss.

"If they're not feeling well, let them leave. It wouldn't do them any good to stick around if they don't want to," said Lauren before giving them a knowing look.

"Alright," agreed Sam reluctantly.

Once they were outside the club, Cristina turned and said "You don't have to escort me back to the hotel."

"I want to, trust me. Those guys were too loud for my liking and I needed a way out. You, my dear friend, gave me an out."

They took a cab back to the hotel. Cristina complained that her headache was getting worse and said she was going straight to bed. Meredith knew Cristina wanted some peace and quiet so she made some excuse about staying downstairs to gamble a little bit. The truth was, she didn't feel like gambling but she didn't want to go upstairs either. To kill time, she walked around the hotel for half an hour. Just when she was about to give up and go upstairs, she spotted a small bar off to the corner and decided to go sit there for a bit.

The bar was small and seemed out of place considering the hotel in which it was situated inside of. It was dark and she couldn't tell if there were other people there or not. Her eyes hadn't yet adjusted from going from the bright fluorescent lights in the casino area to this dark room. She sat down at the bar and was greeted by a short man who took her drink order and left. He wasn't as warm and friendly as Joe, but she wasn't looking for company tonight. She wanted a drink and not have to think about anything.

After the fifth shot of tequila, she went to the bathroom to wash her face. They were leaving tomorrow so it was not smart to have another hang-over on the flight back. As she made her way back, she stumbled on a raised piece of carpet and ungraciously fell forward. Before she fell to the ground, someone reached out and grabbed her.

"We need to stop meeting like this," said a deep male voice that she recognized instantly.

**

* * *

I love all your comments so keep 'em coming:-)**

**Love. Hate. Review.**


	3. Chapter 3

Derek spotted her as soon as she walked in. For a split second, he thought he had imagined her. He spent a good part of the night thinking about her and thought his mind was playing tricks on him. He sat and watched as she took a seat at the bar and gave the bartender her order. Looking around, he realized that her friends hadn't come with her and smiled that his luck.

He sat back and waited patiently as she downed five shots of tequila and stood up. He nearly jumped out of his chair when he saw her walk towards the door, only to turn and made way to the ladies room. Leaning back, he let out a sigh of relief and finishing the rest of his drink, began walking towards the bar. He was determined to talk to her before the night was over.

A few minutes had passed before he heard the restroom door open. He saw her walk out and opened his mouth to say something when she tripped on the carpet. Reaching out, he grabbed her in the nick of time.

* * *

Meredith looked up into the familiar set of blue eyes. She closed her own eyes thinking she had dreamed him up. The tequila was starting to settle into her empty stomach which could be causing her to hallucinate. She was hallucinating, right? 

"Are you okay?" Derek asked as he steadied her.

Opening her eyes when she realized he wasn't a dream, she said "Yes I'm fine, thank you. I tripped on the carpet and you caught me…again," she said, slightly embarrassed at her clumsiness.

"My pleasure," he said, smiling at her.

Meredith's knees felt weak when he smiled at her. Cristina was right. He is McDreamy. She realized that she was staring at him and tried to think of something intelligent to say.

"You are my knight and shining…whatever," she said then flinched when she realized how stupid she must sound. Cristina would be sorely disappointed at just how _not_ intelligent and sophisticated she was being right now.

Derek couldn't help but smile at her choice of words. "I'm your knight and shining whatever," he agreed.

"I'm fine," she said.

"You certainly are," Derek smiled, knowing he meant something else.

"You can, um…let go of my arms."

Derek hadn't realized he was still holding onto her. This was the second time they've touched and he was already craving more.

"I'll only let go if you agree to stay and have a drink with me."

"Okay, but only for one drink."

They moved to the far end of the bar and sat down. They waited for the bartender to fill their order and leave before either one said anything.

"So what's your story?" he asked as soon as the bartender was out of earshot.

"I have no story. I'm just a girl in a bar."

"I'm just a guy in a bar," he responded in kind. "Where are your friends tonight?"

"I needed a break. What about you? How come your blond friend isn't with you?" she asked, then silently cursed herself for asking about the blond. She didn't want him to think she was jealous, because she's not.

"My blond friend?" he asked, confused.

"The one who had her hand on your leg."

Meredith could not believe she was saying this. He's going to think she's jealous which she clearly is not. Feeling her pulse race and the heat rising in her cheeks, she took a sip of her drink and looked away.

"You mean Rebecca," Derek said, smiling when he realized who it was she was referring to. She must've seen them yesterday. Could it be possible that she's jealous? Fate is working overtime for him tonight.

_Rebecca. Even her name sounds sexy. That is, if you're into the "sexy, slutty, 'put my hands on a stranger's lap'" sort of sexy._

"Oh, was that her name?" she asked innocently.

"Hm-hmm." Derek was enjoying himself. He never figured she would be jealous. The evening is _definitely_ looking brighter.

"Why isn't she here with you?" she asked, not wanting to push the subject but her curiosity got the better of her.

"She's not my type."

"Not your type?"

"No. She was looking for a temporary fling and that is not me." Leaning closer to her, he said "You see I'm someone you need to get to know to love."

He was trying to bait her…trying to challenge her. And if she was completely honest with herself, she had to admit that she was very tempted to take the challenge.

"Really?"

"Oh yes."

"So if I know you, I'll love you?" she flirted back.

"Oh yes."

"You really like yourself, huh?"

"Just hiding my pain."

Together they sat at the bar and drank and talked until it was closing time.

* * *

Meredith was having a good dream when she suddenly woke up with a start. Punching the pillows, she tried to go back to sleep so that she and McDreamy could continue with what they were doing. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't go back to sleep. 

_Crap!_

Sitting up on the bed, she looked over at the clock on the nightstand and saw that it was 9am. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around and saw the familiar furnishings of her hotel room. She vaguely remembered sharing a drink with Darren, no Derek and was glad to see she made it back to her room in one piece. Reaching her arms high above her head to stretch her back, she scanned across the living room and did a double-take. The room was familiar, yet there was something different about it. Where are all her stuff? Why isn't she sleeping on the pull-out? Did Izzie stay with Lauren and Sam and that's why she slept in the bed?

Turning around to see if Cristina was still asleep on the other bed, she suddenly realized that she was alone and sitting on a king size bed.

_Crap! Crap! Crap!_

Just then, she heard the shower shutting off in the bathroom. Holding her breath, she waited for the door to open. Her heart was beating wildly as each agonizing second passed on by. Suddenly, she saw the door handle move and Derek came walking out with a towel wrapped loosely around his slim, tone waist. Steam came rushing out of the bathroom behind him. Meredith's jaw dropped wide open at the sight before her.

* * *

"Good morning, sleepyhead!" 

"G-Good morning," she said, barely able to catch her breath. She was trying really hard to keep her eyes trained on his face and not let them stray to his chest, which was where it wanted to go.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked, giving her a devilish smile.

"Yes, thank you," she said, before moving to get off the bed. She stopped when she realized she was completely naked under the sheets. Tugging the sheets up higher over her, she pulled it off the bed to wrap around her body as she stood up. She needed to get out of there. Seeing him standing there half-naked was not good for her. She could feel her nipples harden underneath the sheets and tugged it tighter around her body.

Derek was amused by her modesty. Some aspects of the previous night were fuzzy, but he remembered the sex in vivid details and "modest" would not be a word he'd use to describe her.

"Shouldn't you, um…get dressed?" she asked, hoping that if he were dressed she wouldn't be tempted to pull him back into bed.

"I guess I should."

He moved his hand to the towel and was getting ready to pull it off when she yelled "Stop!"

Looking at her innocently, he asked "What?"

"When I suggested you get dressed, I didn't mean for you to do it here."

"Why not?" he asked, moving towards her. "It's not like you haven't seen me naked before."

Stepping back until her back hit the wall behind her, she said "You…you can get dressed here. Let me get my stuff and I'll change in the bathroom."

With that, she side-stepped him and reached for her dress and bra that lay recklessly discarded on the floor next to her feet. "Have you seen my panties? They're black. Have you seen them?"

"No, I haven't. Let me help you look for them." He bent down to look under the bed which caused the towel to slip further down his waist.

"Actually, I think I'm okay without them," she said before ducking inside the bathroom and slamming the door shut.

She emerged from the bathroom five minutes later. She saw that Derek had also gotten dressed and was standing by the window with his back to her. The heavy curtains were drawn back, letting the sunlight into the room.

"I'm going to get going now," she said.

As soon as Derek heard her voice, he turned around to look at her.

"Meredith. I was hoping that maybe we could see each other again." Derek had no idea how they were going to do it, but he wasn't ready to let her go. Not yet.

"Impossible," she mumbled.

"What?" he asked, unsure that he heard correctly.

"We can't, Derek. This thing with you and me, it can't be anything more than one night. I'm leaving today and I have another life that I need to go back to. Let's not make this complicated."

Meredith's throat felt dry and she was struggling to keep this simple. She was seeing someone and Derek…well, she didn't even know his last name! It was better for the both of them to end it now. She looked back at him and saw disappointment in his eyes.

"It doesn't have to be one night if you don't want it to. What we have is special. I can feel it in my gut," he pleaded with her.

"Impossible. We don't know anything about each other." She was making excuses and they both knew it.

"We know a lot about each other," he tried to argue the point.

"I'm talking about more than the sex."

Running his fingers through his hair to ease his frustration, Derek was about to plead with her when he heard her yell "Oh my god, you're married?!"

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	4. Chapter 4

Meredith saw the flash of gold bounce off the ring on his finger as he ran his hand through his hair.

Looking at her with a confused look on his face, he said "I was, but I'm…"

"No!" she screamed, cutting him off in mid-sentence. "I don't want to hear your excuses."

Reaching for her purse, she started walking towards the door. Moving across the room in lightening speed, he got to her before she reached for the door handle. Turning her around to face him, he tried to make her look at him.

"Meredith, let me explain."

"Let go of me!" she yelled, struggling to free herself from his hold. She was exhausted. This emotional rollercoaster was exhausting.

Derek was not giving up. He couldn't let her walk out of his life. Not like this. After a few minutes of struggling, she gave up and sagged against his arms. "I'm an adulterous whore."

"You are _not_ an adulterous whore," he said, looking straight into her eyes. "Listen to me! I was married once, but that is over."

"Then why are you still wearing your wedding ring?" she asked, pointing to his ring finger.

Derek looked at his left hand and didn't know how that ring got there. Reaching for her hands, he opened his mouth to explain when he felt a slim band on her finger. Holding her hand up between them, they both looked down and realized the exact same thing. The ring on her ring finger was a smaller, yet identical version of the one he was wearing on his.

"Oh my god, _we're_ married?!!" she screamed in disbelief.

"It would appear so," he responded, looking at the ring on his finger again.

"This can't be happening!" she said, feeling herself hyperventilating.

"Maybe you should sit down before you faint," he said, pulling her further inside the room to sit on the bed.

"We can't be married! I'm leaving and I have a life and…and, we just _can't_ be married!"

"Are you already married? Is that what you're trying to tell me?"

"No, I'm not married! I mean, I'm not married to anyone else but you!" she exclaimed.

Derek couldn't help but feel relieved and happy at hearing her say that.

Standing up, she said "I have to go. My flight is in three hours and I still need to pack."

"You can't leave. Not now, not like this."

"Yes I can. Watch me," she said with determination in her voice.

"At least give me your number."

"No! No number. No talking. No…anything!" she yelled. Meredith knew she was being irrational, but she was not prepared to handle something like this and at the moment, all she wanted to do was run as far away as possible.

Letting out a resigned sigh, Derek said "At least let me take you back to your hotel."

"There's no need. I don't have that far to go." Seeing the confused look on his face, she went to explain "I'm staying on the 22nd floor."

* * *

Pulling herself free of his hold, she stood up and walked to the door. She knew he had followed her. She could feel his presence behind her without having to look. Reaching for the door handle, she turned and gave him a faint smile. 

"Meredith…" he pleaded with her one last time.

"I'm sorry," she said, before rushing out so that he didn't see the tears that were threatening to fall.

Once she was safely enclosed inside the elevator, she let herself cry. She didn't know why she was crying. It was absurd to cry over someone she barely knew, yet she couldn't control the rush of emotions that were flooding her mind. Leaning back against the elevator for support, she wiped the tears away and that's when she saw it – the ring that was the cause of her distress. She stared at the ring wondering how she did not notice it before…this yellow strip of gold that lay in contrast against her fair skin.

The elevator doors opened on the 22nd floor. Stepping out, she pulled the ring off and put it inside her purse. Checking her eyes in the mirror that hung next to the elevator doors, she wiped the rest of the tears away, took a deep breath and headed in the direction of her room.

* * *

"You're back!" Izzie squealed when she entered the room. 

"Where have you been?" asked Cristina.

"I…um…I decided to take a walk to get some fresh air," she lied.

"Wearing the same dress from last night?" Cristina asked.

"Actually, I never returned to the room. I was feeling restless after we got back and stayed downstairs to gamble and didn't realize the time," she lied, trying to cover her earlier slip-up.

"Well, I'm glad you're back. We need to pack and start heading out," said Izzie, shuffling her towards the bathroom.

Cristina stood back, watching Meredith. Something didn't seem right with her. Her eyes were red and puffy and it could very well be from lack of sleep, but she also looked sad and defeated. She was going to have to talk to her about this later when Barbie isn't around.

Meredith stepped into the shower and let the hot spray of the water wash away all the memories of the previous night. She was feeling an overwhelming sense of sadness and didn't know how to handle it. She sat down in the shower and let the water wash away the tears that were falling in flowing streams down her face.

She got dressed and finished packing and as she stood at the doorway surveying the empty hotel room, she couldn't help but be reminded of Derek and waking up in his room not too long ago.

By the time they reached the lobby, she decided – against her better judgment – to give this thing they had a chance. They may end up regretting it and hate each other, but she was willing to accept the consequences. The connection she felt with him was too strong to avoid, no matter the amount of distance she tries to put between them.

As they waited for their taxi to arrive, she turned to Izzie and Cristina and said "I need to check something at the front desk. I'll be right back."

Walking up to the receptionist, she asked for a pen and paper. Once she was done, she folded the paper and handed it back to the receptionist. "Can you make sure this gets to Derek in room 1502?"

The receptionist nodded and smiled, assuring her that they'll make sure it gets delivered.

* * *

The lack of sleep was really getting to Meredith by the time they boarded the plane. She was running on auto-pilot and could not wait to be seated so she could take a long nap. Izzie was chatting excitedly about all the stuff that happened after she and Cristina left, which was driving both her and Cristina nuts. 

"If you two don't mind, I think I'm going to catch up on some much needed sleep."

She moved to the seat next to the window and took out the blanket and pillow. She kept shifting and punching the pillow which prompted Cristina who was sitting next to her to ask "What's the matter with you?"

"I can't get comfortable. My body is sore from all the…" She was about to say "sex" when she stopped herself and said "From all the walking around."

"Okay," Cristina responded, watching her as she shifted again and finally found her spot.

* * *

Meredith was having a good dream. Images of Derek were flashing across her mind, making her smile in her sleep. 

_::Flashback in a dream sequence::_

_The door came crashing open with a loud thud as they both fell inside the room. Their mouths were locked in a passionate kiss, their tongues dueling with one another for control. Without breaking the kiss, they stumbled inside the room and closed the door behind them._

_Moving her toward the bed, Derek tugged lightly at her hair to expose the soft lines of her throat. Breaking the kiss, he trailed his mouth down the smooth column of her neck, stopping occasionally to lick and suck on her heated skin. Meredith let out a moan and pulled at his hair, bringing his mouth back to her hungry lips._

"_Meredith, maybe we should…," Derek said between kisses._

"_Shh. No talking…just kissing. Tonight is my wedding night and I want more kissing," she said, giggling._

_She spun them around so that he was standing with his legs backed up against the bed. She pushed him back onto the bed and hiking up her dress, she moved to straddle him. Derek was shocked and excited by her wild abandon. Reaching up, he pulled her head down for yet another passionate kiss. A surprised moan escaped her lips as she felt his tongue invade the soft interiors of her mouth. She laced her fingers with his and moved to hold his hands captive above his head._

_Sitting back so their faces were inches apart, she could see his chest rise and fall, his breathing ragged. Slowly, she began to move her hips in a circular motion, increasing the tempo when she felt the obvious bulge in his pants. Letting go of his hands, she sat up and pulled her dress off over her head, her hands moving around to unclasp her bra. Her breasts felt heavy as she released them from the confines of her bra. Reaching up, Derek cupped her breasts and began to gently massage them, his thumbs grazing the hardened nipples._

_Wanting control, Derek moved so that she was now lying on the bed. Stepping back long enough to rid himself of his clothes, he moved to lean above her. Lowering his head to plant soft kisses on her belly button, his fingers slid underneath the straps of her panties and pulled them off, tossing it carelessly on the floor._

_Meredith's hips moved up of their own volition, but he placed a firm hand on her lower abdomen to still her movements. Moving up her body, he stopped to take an aching breast into his mouth, teasing the throbbing nipple with his tongue and mouth. Just when Meredith thought she was going to pass out from the sheer pleasure, he released her breast, only to move to its twin._

"_Oh my god, Derek!" she screamed._

_Derek took her hands and held them above her head. Leaning down so that they were looking deeply into each other's eyes, he thrust hard into her._

"_Derek!" Meredith screamed when she felt him fill her to the core._

"_Oh my god, Meredith…," he moaned when he felt her muscles contract around him. "Meredith," he repeated her name as he thrust faster and harder into her._

"Meredith." She heard her name being called from a faint distance.

"Meredith!" said Cristina, giving her arm a harder shake.

"Wh-what?" said Meredith, still in a sleepy daze.

"You were moaning," said Cristina with a smirk on her face.

"I was not!" she denied.

"Dude, you were totally moaning," said Izzie, leaning forward to look at her.

"I wasn't moaning!" she said, embarrassed to be caught having sex dreams.

"You were having sex dreams!" exclaimed Cristina.

"Cristina!" Meredith said, looking back to see if anyone heard.

"Who were you having sex dreams with, Mer?" asked Izzie, shifting in her seat to look at Meredith with peaked interest.

"From the sound of it, it was definitely not with McBoring," said Cristina sarcastically.

"I was _not_ having sex dreams. Can we please drop it?"

"Okay, okay…we'll drop it."

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review.**


	5. Chapter 5

Four weeks had passed. Four long, agonizing weeks had passed since the day she left the note for Derek. Like a lovesick teenager, she waited for him. She waited everyday for the phone call. The one call that could change her life, but it never came. As the days turned into weeks, she put all her effort into forgetting him.

During the day she kept herself busy at the hospital, which helped make it easier to forget. The nights were not so easy. Every time she closed her eyes, she would see him. Her dreams were filled with erotic images of him making mad, passionate love to her. Forgetting him was not going to be easy, but she needed to try. It wasn't healthy for her. She was in a relationship and wasn't being fair to anyone by pining after Derek.

* * *

Meredith was filling out the post-op notes for a surgery she had performed earlier when Cristina walked up to her. 

"Hey! Want to go to Joe's tonight after work?"

"I don't feel up to going out," she said, not looking up from the charts.

"You've been walking around here like a zombie ever since we got back from Vegas. You're isolating everyone around you, even your so-called boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend!" she yelled, slamming the file shut.

"Fine. I'm not going to push it, but I'll be at Joe's tonight if you want to talk."

Meredith felt like the biggest jerk. She knew Cristina was only trying to help, but she didn't want to talk about Vegas. She's finally over him and wants to keep all memories that involve him buried deep in the back of her mind.

"Cristina!" Meredith called after her.

Cristina stopped walking and hesitated before turning around to face her.

"Sorry."

She gave Meredith a slight nod of her head, smiled and walked away.

* * *

Meredith and Cristina were seated on the outside patio eating their lunch when Izzie walked up, dropped her tray on the table and sat down. 

"Do any of you know what the meeting tonight is going to be about?"

Stuffing a piece of melon into her mouth, Cristina said "I don't know, but let's hope it doesn't take long. I'm going to Joe's after work to unwind."

"I'll join you," said Izzie, before taking a big bite of her sandwich. "Are you coming, Mer?"

"No…"

* * *

All the surgical Attendings and Residents piled into the conference room next to the Chief's office, waiting for the meeting to start. Meredith, Cristina, and Izzie sat on top of the credenza in the corner watching in amusement as everyone talked and whispered excitedly about this big announcement the Chief was about to make. 

Everyone went quiet as soon as the Chief entered the room and cleared his throat.

"I know some of you have surgeries to prepare for and some of you are ready to go home, so I'll make this quick." Moving to stand in front of the whiteboard, he continued "As many of you are aware, Dr. Peterman has decided to take an early retirement to travel with his wife and family. We've been very fortunate to have Bob spend his tenure here at Seattle Grace. While I'm sad to see him go, I'm also excited to introduce the new doctor that will be replacing Dr. Peterman as Head of Neuro." Taking a deep breath, he smiled and continued "Dr. Shepherd was a former student of mine and I'm confident that he will do a great job. Please join me in welcoming him to Seattle Grace." Looking outside the door, Richard motioned for someone to come in and said "I'd like you all to meet Dr. Derek Shepherd."

* * *

Meredith let out a faint groan when she saw Derek…_her_ Derek walk into the room. 

_No, no…NO! This can't be happening to me._

She just spent the last four weeks of her life trying to forget this man and there he stood, less than twenty feet from her. He hadn't seen her yet, so she moved to try to hide behind the doctor that was standing in front of her. Peering over the doctor's shoulder to steal a look, her heart jumped in her throat when she saw him standing there smiling.

Cristina leaned over and asked "Isn't that McDreamy?"

"What? I…I don't know. Maybe, I guess," she mumbled, struggling to remain composed.

"I think it is," Cristina whispered, not giving up.

"How should I know? I mean, I only saw the guy for a few seconds," she lied, failing miserably.

"Right," she responded, giving her a curious look.

"I, uh…I think I _will_ join you at Joe's tonight," she said. She desperately needed a drink and tequila sounded really good right now. Then again, maybe it wasn't such a good idea since it was tequila that got her into this mess in the first place.

* * *

Derek hated these awkward introductions. He hated being the 'new' guy, but Richard's a good friend and he went through the trouble of planning this, so he pasted on a smile and walked into the room. He was immediately greeted by thirty or so pair of eyes. He scanned the room quickly, not really taking notice of anyone or anything in particular. He walked up to Richard and shook his hand. 

"Why don't you say a few words?" suggested Richard.

Derek wasn't prepared to give a speech so he just winged it. Clearing this throat, he began "Good evening, everyone. First, let me thank all of you for taking the time out of your busy day to come here. I asked Richard not to make a fuss of my arrival, but he insisted on embarrassing me." He turned to Richard and smiled before continuing "I've had the privilege of working with Dr. Peterman on a case a few years back and to this day, I'm completely in awe of his skills and expertise in the field of Neurosurgery. I know I have…" Feeling more relaxed, he paused and began taking a closer look around the room and that's when he saw her sitting behind another doctor

For a split second, Derek thought he dreamed her up. He had been thinking about her so much lately, that it could be possible she's just a figment of his imagination. He looked to her right and saw her friends from Vegas and knew that he wasn't imagining things or at least he hoped he wasn't.

"Derek?" said Richard.

Derek felt Richard give his arm a tentative shake and clearing his throat, he continued "Right! I, um…I know I have big shoes to fill with Bob's departure but I hope we can all work together to make this transition as easy as possible. Thank you."

The room broke out into applause as people made their way to him, offering warm wishes and congratulations. Derek tried his best to focus on what was being said, but he was still reeling from the fact that she was here. She was sitting in the far corner of the room and he was trying his best to maneuver himself over to her, but the crowd of people was making it impossible.

* * *

Meredith sat back and watched as people milled around him, waiting for their turn to talk to him. Cristina and Izzie had somehow made it to the front of the room, but she couldn't move. She had lost all feelings in her legs, so all she could do was sit and stare at him. She saw him make a beeline towards her and the numbness was replaced by a rush of adrenaline as she scooted off the credenza and began squeezing herself through the crowd towards the door. She was almost out the door, when Cristina called her name. 

"Meredith!"

Stopping short of reaching the exit, she turned and hissed "What?!"

"Don't you want to meet him?"

"Um…not really," she said. "I have to go get ready if we're going to Joe's."

"Are you okay?" asked Cristina.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just…need to go get ready," she stuttered, then turned to leave.

The room was getting ridiculously crowded so it took her several minutes to make it to the door. Once she was outside, she let out a sigh of relief at her lucky escape. Making her way down the corridor, she stopped when she heard her name.

"Dr. Grey! Can you come here a minute?"

_What now?_

Putting on a fake smile, she turned to look at the Chief.

Her smile faltered when she saw him standing there with the Chief. She contemplated turning around and running the opposite direction, but what good would that do. She'd still see him tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that, and…. Taking a deep breath, she put her fake smile back on and walked towards them.

"Derek, I want you to meet Meredith. She's Ellis Grey's daughter."

"Actually, we-," Derek was about to explain to the Chief that he already knew Meredith. Very well, in fact.

"It's nice to meet you, Dr. Shepherd," she said, cutting him off.

Derek gave her a knowing look, but smiled and decided to play along. "It's nice to meet you, Meredith," he said, holding his hand out to her.

She stood looking at his hand before reaching out to take it. The spark of electricity that shot through her was immediate. Derek felt it too. Meredith moved to pull her hand back, but he tightened his grip. His thumb playfully stroked the soft skin on her inner wrist, making her gasp lightly. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks and yanked her hand away.

"Again, it's nice to meet you. I'm running late for a thing so I better get going."

"Are you off for the evening?" asked the Chief.

"Yes, I'm heading over to Joe's," she said, desperate to leave.

"Great! Derek doesn't know anyone here, so maybe you can take him along."

Smiling at the Chief's suggestion, Derek said "I would _love_ to come with you."

"No!" she yelled. "I mean, no I can't. I'm meeting some people there and may not even stay long. I've suddenly come up with a headache," she lied.

"Oh, well that's too bad. Maybe tomorrow" said the Chief, disappointed.

"Yeah, sure…tomorrow,' she agreed, not sure what she was agreeing to. All she could think about was getting the hell out of there.

"Tomorrow sounds great!" Derek said excitedly.

"Wh-what?" she asked, turning to look at them.

"Tomorrow. You and I can get together tomorrow for a date. I would love to get a personal guide through this beautiful city."

"Well, I-,"

"Great! That settles it."

_Oh, you're sneaky._

* * *

Meredith saw Cristina sitting at their usual spot at the bar as soon as she walked in. Walking up to the bar, she dropped her bag on the floor and plopped down on the empty seat next to her. 

"Where's Izzie?" Meredith asked.

"She's running late."

"What can I get you, honey?" asked Joe, walking up to give her a hug.

"My usual," she said, giving him a weak smile. Joe knew her "usual" meant a triple shot of tequila.

"Bad day?" he asked, filling her drink.

"_Bad_ is an understatement," she said, before pouring the entire contents of her drink down her throat. She closed her eyes as she felt the liquid burn a hot path down her throat into her empty stomach.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on or do we sit here a while longer and pretend to have nice, boring conversations?" asked Cristina as soon as Joe left to fill another customer's order.

"Why do you think something is wrong?" she asked, trying to dodge the question.

"C'mon Mer. Get serious," she said, before turning around to face her. "You haven't been yourself since we got back from Vegas. McDreamy shows up as the new Head of Neuro and you shy away from him. For the past three years, all I've ever heard from you is how you want to go into Neuro and the one chance you get to kiss up to the new boss, you run in the other direction. What's going on?"

Letting out a deep sigh, she said "You can't react or judge me with what I'm about to tell you."

"Okay."

"I slept with him."

"Slept with who? McVet?"

"No! McDreamy! I mean Derek…I slept with Derek." Meredith felt like a big boulder had been lifted off her shoulders. She'd been holding all this inside for so long, it was nice to finally tell someone.

"When? In Vegas?"

"Yes."

"You slept with McDreamy in Vegas?"

"Yes. That night when you and I left Sam's party early and I stayed downstairs. I ran into him at the hotel bar and we got to talking and…," she explained.

"You went back to his room and did the nasty nasty?"

"Cristina!"

"Sorry. Go on."

"There's something else," she said, dreading what she was about to say. "We're married."

"You're what?!" Cristina yelled.

"Shh! Please lower your voice," she pleaded with her.

"You're married?" she asked, not believing what she'd heard.

"I have no idea how that happened. I remembered waking up in the hotel room that I thought was ours, except that it wasn't. Then he came walking out of the bathroom all naked and wet and steamy. And he had a ring on his finger and I thought he was married, then he showed me the ring on my finger that looked like his, but smaller and I freaked so I left, but not before leaving a note. And he never called, and…and…and I don't know," she rambled then dropped her head onto the counter with a loud thump.

"Shit."

Raising her head to look at Cristina, she said "Is that all you can say?"

"I guess what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas."

"No! It freaking follows you back to Seattle!"

**

* * *

I love all your comments! Reading them makes my day. **

**Love. Hate. Review.**


	6. Chapter 6

"So what are you going to do?"

"I have to file for a divorce." Her heart felt heavy as soon as those words came out of her mouth.

"A divorce," repeated Cristina.

"Yes. I have to do it. I _need_ to do it," she said with determination in her voice. "I'll tell him tomorrow on our date."

Cristina nearly choked on her drink when she heard Meredith utter those last few words.

"Wait! You're going on a date with him?" she asked with disbelief.

"Yes. Well it's not really a date…date. The Chief asked me to show Derek around town since he's new here and I kinda got tricked into agreeing." She tried to explain, but from the look on Cristina's face, she knew she wasn't making any sense.

"You're going to take him out on a date, then tell him that you're divorcing him?"

"Yes," she said, unsure of herself.

"Way to bring out the welcome wagon, Mer."

"I know I--," she said before they were interrupted.

"Hey guys! Sorry I'm late. Did I miss anything exciting?" asked Izzie, sitting down next to Meredith.

"Did you ever," mumbled Cristina.

Meredith shot her a look, pleading with her eyes not to say anything to Izzie. The fewer the people that knew about this, the better. She decided that she was going to cancel their date tomorrow and tell him about the divorce as soon as she sees him.

* * *

Meredith woke up at 4am the next morning in a pool of sweat. She was dreaming about Derek again. She'd spent four weeks trying to forget him and just when she was finally over him, he shows up and ruins everything. Lying in her bed, staring at the ceiling, she thought about the note. She put herself out there by leaving him the note and he didn't have so much as an ounce of decency to at least call. Even if he wasn't interested, a call to say "no thank you" would've been better than his blatant disregard for her feelings by _not_ calling. She had to do it. Today was the day she was going to tell him about the divorce. Pushing back the covers, she went to take a shower.

* * *

It was mid-morning when she finally saw him. She was going to the lab to return some files when she spotted him waiting by the elevator. He was busy typing on his blackberry and didn't notice her walking up until she moved to stand a few feet in front of him. Looking up from the blackberry, Derek smiled when he saw her.

"Seattle has ferryboats," he said, still typing into the blackberry.

"Yes…," she replied, smiling with her back to him.

"I didn't know that. I've been living here for four weeks. I didn't know there were ferryboats," he said, looking up momentarily before returning to stare at the small screen.

"Seattle is surrounded by water on three sides," she said, her smile getting bigger.

"Hence, the ferryboats," he said before placing the blackberry into his coat pocket. The elevator doors opened and following her inside, he continued "Now I have to like it here. I wasn't planning on liking it here. I'm from New York…genetically engineered to dislike everywhere, except Manhattan." Turning back to give her a brief sideways glance, he said "I have a thing for ferryboats."

Meredith's heart began beating wildly in her chest as soon as the doors closed. She had him alone in the elevator which provided her with the perfect opportunity to talk about the divorce, but she couldn't bring herself to say it. The silence was deafening and she was struggling to find something to say.

"I'm not going out with you," she said, staring at the back of his head.

"We have a date. You promised to take me on a date," he said, smiling to himself.

"I'm not dating you and I'm definitely not sleeping with you again – you're my boss," she paused, letting the enormity of that realization sink in. "Look, I'm drawing a line. The line is drawn. There's a big…line."

Derek could hear her shallow breathing from where he stood. She was nervous which he found endearing. Turning around to face her, he said "So this line. Is it imaginary or do I need to get you a marker?"

As soon as their eyes met, Meredith lost all self-control. Dropping the files onto the floor, she pushed him back against the elevator wall and kissed him frantically. Derek was taken aback by her sudden change in attitude, but he quickly recovered. Shifting their positions so she had her back against wall, he softened the kiss, taking his time in coaxing her lips apart so his tongue could invade its soft interior. He heard her moan, which excited him more. His hand moved up behind her neck to pull her closer to him. His other hand strayed inside her lab coat, moving further still until he felt her bare midriff underneath her scrub top. Gently stroking the soft skin, his fingers moved up her ribcage to cup her breast through her silk bra.

The loud ring of the elevator snapped Meredith out of her haze and letting go of Derek, she bent down to retrieve the files. As soon as the doors opened, she rushed out without looking back.

"We'll talk later?" he called after her. Moving aside to allow the people in, he adjusted his lab coat to hide the very obvious large bulge in his pants.

* * *

A half an hour had passed and Derek was still thinking about the kiss he'd shared with Meredith. If the elevator doors hadn't opened, he probably would've made love to her then and there. Absently touching his lips, he could still feel her warm breath against his lips as they kissed. The memory of her soft pliant body pushed up against his was making him aroused all over again. 

When she left him in Vegas, he never dreamed he'd see her again. She had made it pretty clear that she didn't want anything to do with him, regardless of the fact that they were married. He tried to get over her, convincing himself that her leaving him was a blessing in disguise. He thought he'd succeeded until he walked into the conference room and saw her again. He didn't know what Fate had in store for them, but now that he's here, he wasn't ready to give her up just yet.

* * *

Standing at the nurse's station, Meredith was flipping through some charts, but her mind was elsewhere. She was thinking about Derek and the kiss in the elevator. Her skin was still tingling from where he had touched her. How did she go from wanting a divorce to letting him kiss and grope her in the elevator? 

"Hey!" said Cristina cheerily, walking up to stand next to her. Looking around to make sure they were alone, she asked "Did you ask McDreamy for the divorce?"

"No," she said.

"You haven't seen him yet?"

"No, I did. I saw him earlier in the elevator."

"And you didn't say anything?"

"I, uh…I…," she said, suddenly losing her ability to speak.

"Oh, what did you do?" Cristina asked, giving her a questioning look.

"Nothing! It's just that I _may_ have…kind of…sort of…kissed him," she said, her voice trailing off.

"You did what?!" yelled Cristina, causing Meredith to wince.

Just then, they both looked up to see Derek walking down the corridor stopping at the opposite side of the nurse's station. He gave them a curious look and reached for a patient's file, pretending to read the charts. He would look up occasionally to look at her, giving her his playful dreamy smile. Meredith tried to look away, but she couldn't help herself and smiled back.

"Will you stop that?" said Cristina, letting out an exasperated sigh.

"Stop what?" asked Meredith.

"You two are having eye sex!" she hissed.

Shocked by Cristina's comment, she turned to look at her and said "We're _not_ having eye sex! We're not having any kind of sex."

"Whatever you two _are_ having, do it in private."

Meredith was about to retort when she heard someone call her name from behind.

"Finn!" she said, putting a big smile on her face. "What are you doing here?"

"I missed you and wanted to stop by to see how my favorite doctor was doing," he said, walking up to pull her into a big hug. Pulling back slightly, he leaned down and kissed her.

Meredith could feel Derek's eyes on her. She didn't need to look over to know that he was watching them. Pulling out of Finn's arms, she asked "When did you get back?"

"My flight was delayed so I didn't get back until late last night. Boy, I've really missed you. Two weeks is a long time to be away from you."

"Were we supposed to go out tonight?" she asked. She'd been so busy thinking about Derek that she completely forgot about Finn and when he was due back from his trip.

"Actually, that's why I'm here. I know we were supposed to go to dinner when I got back, but I won't be able to make it. A patient of mine is about to deliver any minute so I need to be around when it happens."

"Oh, okay."

"Dr. Grey?"

She flinched when she heard Derek call her name from behind her. Putting on a fake smile, she turned and looked at him. Walking up, Derek went to stand next to Meredith, his arm brushing lightly against hers. Derek and Finn looked at each other, sizing each other up and then looked to Meredith expecting her to make the introductions.

When it became obvious that she wasn't going to say anything, Finn extended his hand and said "Hi. I'm Finn Dandridge, Meredith's boyfriend."

"It's nice to meet you Finn. I'm Derek Shepherd, Meredith's hus--."

"Head of Neuro!" Both men turned to look at Meredith. Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, she continued "Derek's the new head of neuro."

"Head of neuro?" Finn asked, giving Meredith a curious look. He thought he heard something else.

"Y-yes. Dr. Peterman retired and Derek, I mean Dr. Shepherd is taking over that department," she tried explaining.

Derek was standing there, but he didn't hear a single word that was being said. He was feeling angry and betrayed. She has a boyfriend? Did they get together before or after Vegas? Was that why she was in such a hurry to leave? All these questions were making his head spin and he was going to get the answers even if it kills him. But first, he needed to get rid of Finn so he and Meredith could talk.

"Meredith, I need to talk to you about tonight," he said, looking at Finn.

"Can we talk later?" she asked, her eyes pleading with him.

"What's happening tonight?" asked Finn.

"We're going on a…," Derek started to explain, but stopped when he felt Meredith pull his arm.

"Actually, let's talk now!" said Meredith, pulling Derek away. Turning back to look at Finn, she smiled and said "Give us a few minutes, okay?"

From a few feet away, Cristina was thoroughly amused as she watched the exchange between the three of them.

"Do you know what's up between those two?" she heard Finn ask as he walked up to stand next to her.

Rolling her eyes, she put on a fake smile, turned around and asked "What do you mean?"

"Do they know each other well?" he asked, looking curiously at Meredith and Derek. He could see that they were having a heated discussion, but was standing too far away to hear what was being said.

"They just met."

"Really? They're acting like--," he said, not taking his eyes off Meredith.

"Like an old married couple?" asked Cristina, smiling to herself.

Turning to look at Cristina, he asked "What?"

"Nothing!" Gathering her stuff, she flashed him another fake smile and walked away.

**

* * *

I'm happy you all like my fic. Writing this has become an addiction for me. :-) **

**Love. Hate. Review.**


	7. Chapter 7

Meredith was fuming as she pulled Derek to the far corner where she knew they would be out of Finn's earshot.

"What do you think you're doing?" she hissed.

"What am _I_ doing? What are _you_ doing? Who's Finn?" he asked, barely able to contain his anger.

"It's none of your business."

"None of my business? You're my wife! I deserve to know." Derek felt an odd sense of déjà vu.

"You lost the right to ask me questions about _my life_ when you chose to ignore the note!" Meredith regretted saying those words as soon as they came out. She had decided never to think or talk about the note. Ever. It was too painful.

What note? Derek wasn't sure he knew what she was talking about.

With a resigned sigh, she lowered her voice and said "We both know this was a mistake. Let's try to make the best of a not-so-good situation and be civil with each other."

"You're right. I'm sorry," he said, smiling at her.

"Finn is someone I've been seeing on and off. That's it." She volunteered the information.

"Was that _before or after_ we were married?" Derek didn't want to ask the question, but he _needed_ to know.

"Before," she responded.

"Good. Are you going to break things off with him?" he asked, giving her a teasing smile.

"No," she said, smiling back. There was something about him that makes it hard to hate him, even earlier when he was being an ass.

"Look, we slept together once," she said.

"_And_ we kissed in an elevator," he said, giving her a devilish grin.

"And we kissed in an elevator," she repeated, returning his smile. "But I'm not breaking things off with Finn."

Derek didn't like what she said, but he kept quiet. At this point, he would rather have her in his life than not at all. He was going to have to think hard for ways to get rid of the boyfriend.

"Fine. What time should I pick you up for our date?" he asked.

"Actually, I was thinking--,"

"You can't cancel," he interrupted, before she had a chance to finish her sentence. "Seattle is a big city and how would you feel if I got lost because you didn't show me around?" he teased her.

"You're a big boy, you can handle it," she said, laughing at the face he made. "Fine. We meet in front of Joe's at 7pm. In case you don't know, Joe's is also known as the Emerald City bar across the street. Joe is the name of the owner." She gave him a big smile and walked away.

"I'll see you tonight at 7 for our date!" he called after her.

Meredith stopped in her tracks and turned to give him a warning look. She knew he did it intentionally so that Finn heard. Giving her a wink, he started whistling and walked away.

"Are you two going on a date?" he asked as soon as she walked back.

"What? No!" she denied.

"Well, what did he mean by "see you at 7 for our date"?" he asked, not completely convinced she was telling the truth.

"It's not really a _date_…date," she said, trying to explain. "Derek's new here and the Chief asked me to take him around Seattle. He knows my mother and is good friends with the Chief so I'm only doing this as a favor. It's nothing."

"Are you sure there isn't something more?"

"No! I barely know him. Can we not talk about this?" she pleaded.

"It's just that you two seem pretty friendly to be on a first name basis already."

"There is nothing going on with Dr. Shepherd and I. He's my new boss and I'm doing the Chief a favor. That's all."

"Maybe I should come with you tonight," he suggested.

"Don't be silly. You need to be available when your patient delivers. Besides, it's only going to be an hour or so." Looking at her watch, she said "I have a surgery I need to prepare for in thirty minutes. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

Without waiting for a response, she leaned in, gave him a quick kiss on the lips and walked away. Meredith was lying. Her surgery wasn't for a few more hours, but she needed to get out of there.

* * *

Meredith was sitting at a table on the patio, playing with her lunch when Cristina walked up and deposited her tray onto the table and took a seat opposite Meredith. 

"So, how's your day going Mer?" she asked, not even trying to hide her amusement.

"You know exactly how it's going. Finn's back and I have the date…I mean the non-date with Derek tonight," she said, looking at her.

"You're dating two men?" Cristina asked, smiling at the possibility.

"I'm _not_ dating two men. I'm seeing Finn and I'm married to Derek," she tried explaining.

"Uh, yeah!" Cristina gave her a look like she'd just said the stupidest thing.

"It's complicated."

"So un-complicate it," said Cristina. "Either get rid of McDreamy or McVet."

"I can't get rid of Derek. I work with him and I see him everyday."

"You're making excuses."

"I am not!" said Meredith, raising her voice. She hates it when Cristina's right. "I'm seeing Finn. Derek means nothing to me," she lied.

"Personally, I don't know what it is you see in McVet. He's boring and always wears green. I mean, doesn't that strike you as kind of weird?"

"So what if he likes green," she said, defending him.

"Who likes green?" asked Izzie, walking up to sit next to Meredith.

"McVet," said Cristina, before shoving a piece of watermelon into her mouth.

"Finn's back?" Izzie asked.

"He came by to visit earlier," explained Meredith.

"Now that you mention it, he does wear green a lot," said Izzie, confirming Cristina's observation.

"Okay, so we've established that he likes green. There's nothing wrong with that!" Meredith was getting tired of this conversation. "Let's talk about something else."

"Okay," said Izzie. Leaning in closer to Meredith and Cristina, she said "Did you know that Dr. Shepherd was married?" She smiled and sat back, taking a bite of her sandwich.

_Oh my god! Does Izzie know?_

"M-married? Did you say he is married?" she asked, feeling her throat tighten.

"Not _is_…_was_. He was married to an OB/GYN doctor and neonatal specialist back in New York."

"Well what do you know…McDreamy was married," said Cristina, looking straight at Meredith.

"McDreamy?" Izzie asked, confused.

"That's Cristina's nickname for him," said Meredith, trying to recover from the shock of learning that he was married.

"It fits," said Izzie, giving it some thought.

* * *

Meredith spent the rest of the afternoon avoiding Derek. Her mind was still reeling from the news of his marriage. It shouldn't bother her that he was once married, but it did and she couldn't stop thinking about it. Hundreds of questions were swirling around in her head. What did she look like? Why didn't their marriage work? And more importantly – Was _she_ the "rebound" girl? 

She was in the locker room changing when Cristina and Izzie walked in.

"Hey Mer. Cristina and I are going over to Joe's, do you want to come?"

"Sorry Iz, but I can't. I promised the Chief I would show Der…Dr. Shepherd around Seattle." She needs to remind herself to stop calling him by his first name. The last thing she wanted was to be the root of any hospital gossip. "I'm meeting him outside Joe's so I'll walk with you guys over there."

"You're lucky to be going on a date with him," said Izzie, pulling off her scrub top.

"It's not a date! It's just a thing I'm doing for the Chief and it's definitely _not_…a date" Meredith retorted.

Cristina gave her a curious look. She's never seen Meredith get so stirred up over a guy before. There's more to this than what Meredith's letting on.

"Okay, it's not a date. Geez, don't jump down my throat about it," Izzie said, giving her a strange look.

Because of daylight savings, the sun hadn't set even though it was 7pm. She could see Derek standing outside the door watching her as she walked across the street. Giving her a smile, he greeted the three of them as they arrived.

"Dr. Yang, Dr. Stevens…how are you two doing this evening?"

"We're doing great. We're going inside to unwind at Joe's for a little bit," said Izzie, giving him a friendly smile.

"Well, I hope you two have a wonderful evening," he said, opening the door for them.

Smiling broader at what a gentleman he was, Izzie looked at Meredith and said in a sing-song voice "Have fun, you two."

"Thanks," said Meredith, a little embarrassed. Walking up to Izzie, she handed her the car keys and lowering her voice, said "Drive carefully and don't wait up."

As soon as they left, Derek turned to her and asked "Are you ready for our date?" Smiling, he reached forward to hold onto her arm and gently guide her towards his parked car. Walking up to the passenger side, he opened the door and held it for her.

"I can't wait to see what you have to show me tonight," he said, giving her an outrageously flirtatious smile.

Stopping short of getting inside the car, she turned to look at him, their faces a few inches apart and said "Before we start, there are a few rules to this non-date thing."

Still smiling, he gave her a curious look and said "Rules? I can't imagine an old married couple like us needing any of them…rules."

"Number one: No flirting. Second: No talking about Finn and C: No giving me the face."

"The face?" he said, looking at her strangely.

"The McDreamy face. Doesn't work on me. I'm immune."

"If I was going to sit around waiting for a "patient" to deliver, I would've invited you to keep me company. Especially if I haven't seen you for two weeks." The dreamy smile he gave was infectious.

"Breaking rules one, two and three!" she said, pretending to be upset. She was having a hard time resisting his charm and tonight he was bringing it all out.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review **


	8. Chapter 8

"So where are you taking me?" he asked, as soon as he was settled inside the car.

"I, um…know this place where there's an amazing view of the sunset over the ferryboats."

"I have a thing for ferryboats."

"I remember," she said, smiling up into his face.

* * *

The sun was starting to set so they decided to get Italian take-out. It was a cool night, so they made a nice little comfortable setup at Belvedere Park. Derek poured the wine while Meredith made a plate of salad and pasta for each of them. 

"So if I'm not allowed to flirt, talk about the boyfriend and give you the—what was it you called the face?" he asked with a half-smile.

"McDreamy. The McDreamy face," she said, embarrassed to have to repeat it.

"Right…so if I can't do any of that, what's there left to do?" he asked, leaning in closer to her.

"I—I'm not sleeping with you again," she said, her breathing a little ragged.

"You already said that," he said, moving even closer to her.

"I mean it," she said, feeling her pulse quicken. "I'm seeing Finn, and--," she continued nervously before he interrupted her.

"Ah…ah…ah, no talking about the boyfriend, remember?" he said, lightly tapping the bridge of her nose with his finger.

"Right," she said, not sure why she felt the need to bring Finn up. Perhaps if she mentions his name often enough it would be easier to resist Derek.

Derek could see that she was getting uncomfortable, so he sat up and changed the subject.

"You know, I studied under your mother."

"You did?"

"Yep. She'd fly these cowboys in from Prague to do these amazing medical procedures. She's a brilliant surgeon."

"Yes, she is," Meredith agreed.

"From what I've seen of you in surgery, you'll be brilliant just like her."

"I'm nothing like my mother," she said, saddened by the lack of mother-daughter relationship she should've had growing up.

"You're a great doctor and I think you'll take the field of neurosurgery by storm if you choose to make that your specialty."

"Flattery will get you nowhere and it _definitely_ won't get me into bed with you," said Meredith.

"I'm not interested---," he started to say before she interrupted him.

"Oh…," she said softly, thinking she misunderstood his intentions.

Putting his fingers underneath her chin, he turned her face up to meet his. "Let me make this very clear. I want you, Meredith Grey. I am _very interested_ in getting you into bed again. I am not; however, interested in using flattery to get it."

"It's the chase, isn't it?" she asked, still not completely convinced.

"The chase?" he asked, giving her a questioning look.

"You know you're my boss. You know I can't date you. You know I'm seeing Finn. It's the thrill of the chase."

He was about to deny her statement, when she suddenly stood up.

"We have to get going. It's late and I need to get up early."

* * *

They arrived at her house thirty minutes later. On the drive back, she pointed out a few more places of interest and talked about living in Seattle. Derek did the polite thing and listened to her talk the whole way. He walked her to the door and a few steps shy of reaching it; he pulled her arm lightly so that she turned to look at him. 

"It's not the chase," he said.

"What?"

"You and me. It is not the thrill of the chase. It's not a game. It's…. It's your tiny ineffectual fists." Leaning in so their faces were a few inches apart, he continued "And your hair…"

"My hair?" she asked, smiling sweetly.

"Smells good. And you're very very bossy. It keeps me in line."

"I'm still not going out with you."

"You say that now." He gave her a light kiss on the lips and walked away.

* * *

Meredith stood watching him as he left. Her lips were still tingling from the soft kiss he planted on them before he left. Letting herself inside, she started to walk upstairs but stopped and took a slight detour to the kitchen. Pouring herself a glass of tequila, she moved to sit by the counter. Cursing the gold liquid in her hand, she tipped the glass over and emptied all its contents down her throat. Letting out a pathetic laugh, she poured herself another drink. Before the date, she was so sure she could walk away from him. But now she's not sure what to do. 

She didn't go to bed until after midnight and woke up with a nasty hangover. She arrived to work late and had to go straight into a five hour surgery. She was walking out of the OR room, massaging her neck and back when Cristina came up from behind her.

"Finally," she said.

Turning around to face Cristina, she said "Why are you yelling?"

"I'm not yelling," she said. Taking a closer look at Meredith, saw that her eyes were bloodshot and she looked exhausted. "You look like shit."

"Thanks," she said, sarcastically.

"Rough night?" she said, with a devilish grin.

Letting out an exasperated sigh, she said "I got no sleep and have a hangover."

"Just exactly what _did_ you and McDreamy do on your "date"?"

"We didn't do anything. He was a perfect gentleman and dropped me off early," she explained. "I stayed up late and tequila kept me company."

"Wasn't tequila what got you into this mess in the first place," asked Cristina.

"So?" she asked, defensively.

"Seriously? You want to go there?" Cristina retorted.

At that moment, Derek came walking up to them.

"Mer—um, Dr. Grey," he corrected, when Cristina gave him a curious look. "I'm going to do a surgical resection on a patient of mine that was diagnosed with osteosarcoma. I was wondering if you'd be interested in scrubbing in to assist me."

Meredith's back was aching and she desperately needed sleep, but the thought of working with him on this surgery case was too exciting for her to turn down.

"I would love it," she said, smiling up to him.

Returning her smile, he gave her the details of the surgery and left.

"You're falling for him," said Cristina as they watched him leave.

"I am not!"

"Denial is not a river in Egypt, it's a freaking ocean and you, my friend, are its Queen."

"I'm not in love with him. I'm just…. He's just... He knows I'm interested in neuro and is being a good friend, that's all"

"Right. He's being a "good" friend. Sure…" She gave her an 'I'm not convinced' look and walked away.

* * *

Meredith usually gets a high whenever she's in surgery, but tonight she was getting an extra rush of adrenaline. It probably has something to do with the fact that Derek is standing a few feet from her. They operated in perfect unison, like a beautifully choreographed dance. Meredith could hear a few of the nurses comment on how well coordinated they were with each other and it made her smile. 

Derek would look up occasionally to smile at her and comment on how well she was doing. Meredith would smile and return an equally complimentary comment. As the surgery progressed, the looks they gave each other became more sexually charged. Meredith could feel herself getting aroused, the heat pooling at her core. She fidgeted lightly to help ease her aroused state which caused Derek to look up at her.

"How are you doing over there, Dr. Grey?" he asked, looking concerned.

"I-I'm fine. I just have an itch," she said, thinking that this particular itch can only be scratched by him. Shaking her head lightly, she tried to erase the image of him from her head.

"You're doing great. We have about an hour left," he said, winking at her.

"Okay," she said, grateful that she had the mask on to hide her flushed cheeks. She was getting excited over a few flirtatious looks.

_It's not good for my mental state to be around this man. We're having 'eye sex' while in surgery!!_

It was late by the time they got out of the OR. Derek congratulated everyone on a job well done and excused himself so he could tell the patient's family of her condition.

Twenty minutes later, she was walking to the elevator when he spotted her and came running over. They stood in silence waiting for the elevator to arrive on their floor. The hospital was nearly deserted so it was no surprise that the elevator was empty when the doors opened. Derek stepped aside and held the door for her so she could walk in. She headed straight to the back, trying to put as much space between them. She was exhausted.

"Do you want to grab a bite to eat?"

Leaning back against the elevator, she closed her eyes and said "I don't need food. I need a bed."

Derek smiled at how sweet and vulnerable she looked standing there. Closing the distance between them, he said "A bed sounds nice too."

Meredith opened her eyes to see him standing right in front of her. Putting his hands on the rail on each side of her hips, he leaned down and kissed her. His lips were tentative at first but when she didn't resist, he smiled and deepened the kiss, letting his tongue stray inside. Meredith's hands moved up of their own accord to rest on his chest. She could feel his heart beating evenly against her hands, while her own were beating uncontrollably.

"Derek…," she sighed his name.

"Meredith, I think I'm fal--." The loud noise of the elevator door ring brought them both crashing back to reality. Embarrassed at allowing him to kiss her again in the elevator, Meredith pushed past him as the doors opened.

"Meredith, wait!" Derek called after her.

Without turning around, she yelled over her shoulder "Thank you for letting me scrub in with you. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

**

* * *

Thank you everyone for your comments. I read all of them and value your opinions. **

**Love. Hate. Review.**


	9. Chapter 9

Derek watched her as she disappeared out into the parking lot. He didn't want to see her leave, but a part of him was relieved that they were interrupted before things got out of hand. He had been so caught up in the moment that he nearly let it slip that he was falling for her. She may be his wife, but the fact remains is that she's seeing someone else and there is nothing he can do about it. He can't force her to leave the boyfriend and make her love him. He's learned from his past mistakes that you can't make someone love you just to hold onto a marriage.

* * *

A week had passed since the elevator incident. Meredith took great care in avoiding Derek, except when they were in surgery together. Even then, she avoided eye contact with him and kept any conversation to a minimum. She knew she was being unreasonable, but running away from her problems is what she does best. She needed to sort through her feelings and whenever she's close to him, things get fuzzy and she ends up in his arms.

It was the end of her shift and she was walking to the elevator when she spotted him standing there. He hadn't seen her so she slowed her pace so she could look at him a little longer. He looked exhausted and sad. Looking up when he heard footsteps approach, the sad withdrawn look was replaced with a warm smile as soon as he saw her.

"Hi," he said, his eyes taking in the sight of her.

"Hi," she said, smiling back at him.

The elevator doors opened and they both hesitated. Derek reached out to hold the door for her, but she took a step back and said "I, uh…I'm going to take the stairs."

_Coward!_

"We can share an elevator, Meredith," he said, knowing why she was hesitant. "I promise I won't touch you."

"I--," she said, unsure of what to do.

"Meredith…please," he said.

"Okay."

He stepped aside and let her walk in. They rode the elevator in silence when she suddenly blurted out "What happened to your first marriage?"

"What?" he asked, shocked by her question.

Meredith regretted her question as soon as the words came out. But ever since she learned of his previous marriage, she couldn't stop thinking about it.

"I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked," she said, walking out as the elevator doors opened. She knew he followed her so she quickened her pace, hoping to make it to her car before he said anything else.

Derek caught up to her and reached for her arm. Turning her around, he said "Please don't leave. You deserve to know about Addison." Seeing the confused look on her face, he said "Addison Montgomery is her name."

"Oh," she said, thinking it was an odd name.

He gestured to the empty chairs in the lobby and they both walked over and sat down.

Letting out a deep sigh, he turned to look at her. "One night, I park my car and unlock my front door, go inside my house and something's different. Nothing's different. Everything's the same, but yet still…something's different. Then I stand there for a while…and then I know. See there are moments for me. You know, usually when I'm in the OR…when I just know what's going to happen next."

Pausing to take deep breath, he continued "So I go upstairs. As I'm walking down the hall, I'm trying to prepare myself for what I'm going to see when I go into my bedroom. I step on a man's jacket that doesn't belong to me. Then everything I think I know…just shifts. Because the jacket that doesn't belong to me is the jacket that I recognize."

Letting out another deep sigh, he went on to explain. "What I know now is that when I go into my bedroom, I'm not just going to see that my wife is cheating on me. I'm going to see that my wife is cheating on me with Mark, who happened to be my best friend. It's just so pedestrian, common and dirty—cruel. Mostly, just cruel."

Meredith was speechless. She suddenly felt like the biggest jerk for making him re-live this nightmare.

"She pleaded with me, saying it was just one time. And as angry and hurt as I was, I forgave her. I mean, we were married for seven years. That's seven anniversaries, seven birthdays, seven Christmases…you know? How could I just let that go without a fight?"

"For a while, we were happy or at least we pretended to be. It lasted six months. Then one day, I come home from work and see an envelope lying on the floor as I walked inside. Without opening it, I knew that it was a petition for divorce. It seems my wife could not keep to her side of the bargain and went back to Mark."

"A month after my divorce was finalized; I got a call from Richard offering me the job here in Seattle. As a going away gift, my friends planned a trip to Vegas and…,"

"And you met me," she said.

"And I met you."

"What was I to you? The girl you screwed to get over being screwed?"

"You were like coming up for fresh air. It's like I was drowning and you saved me. That's all I know."

She was about to respond when her phone rang. Reaching for the phone, she looked at the number on the display and knew who it was calling her.

"Thank you," she said, smiling sadly at him.

"For what?" he asked, wondering to himself who it was that called.

"For being you." She leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. Standing up, she said "I have to go. I have a thing I need to do."

Giving him another smile, she walked out. She didn't want to leave him sitting there alone, but Finn was calling her and she was already running late for their dinner. There were a couple of things she needed to do and it all starts with Finn.

* * *

Meredith arrived at Finn's house forty-five minutes late. She ran to the door and knocked lightly, hoping he wasn't too upset. She could see that the lights were on inside, but there was no answer. After a few minutes had passed, she decided to give up and turned to leave when the door opened.

"Meredith?"

"Hi. I'm sorry I'm late," she said, turning around to face him.

"I called you but it went straight to voicemail." He moved aside and gestured for her to come in.

"I was talking to Derek and lost track of time," she explained.

"Derek?" he asked, wondering if he should know who that was.

"Dr. Shepherd. He's the new head of neuro I introduced you to a few weeks ago," she explained, slightly annoyed that he forgot.

"Oh, right. I remember now. How is he doing?" he asked.

"He looked exhausted and sad, so I stuck around to talk to him to make sure he was okay. That's why I ran late," she explained, feeling guilty.

"Actually, that wasn't what I meant when I asked how he was doing?"

"You didn't?"

"No. I wanted to know how he was doing with the new job."

Oh," she said, her cheeks flushed. "He…he's doing fine."

"Good," he said, giving her a strange look.

"Good."

"What I made for dinner won't be good anymore, but we can order out if you like," he said as he moved to walk past her into the living room.

"We don't have to order out," she said, not moving from the spot she had been standing in.

"Aren't you hungry? If not, we could open a bottle of wine and watch a movie or something."

"I, um…I won't be staying long."

"Do you need to go back to the hospital?"

"No…" she said, struggling to find the words to tell him that it was over.

"Meredith. What's wrong?" he asked, concerned by her odd behavior.

"It's Derek," she said. "You see…he and I…well we sort of had a thing."

"I thought you said you barely knew him."

"I didn't…I mean I do," she said, not able to gather her thoughts.

"Well what is it?" he demanded.

"We met in Vegas and kind of got together and when I left, I thought that was it. But then he showed up here a few weeks later as my new boss." She paused when she heard Finn let out a frustrated sigh. "I tried to forget about him, but it's hard when you work together and see each other every day."

"So what are you telling me?" he asked, although he probably already knew the answer.

"I know this will seem ridiculous, but somehow in the midst of me trying to get over him, I ended up falling in love with him."

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review.**


	10. Chapter 10

Meredith left Finn's place and instead of going home, she went to the one place she knew would comfort her. Thirty minutes later, she parked her car at Belvedere Park and turned off the ignition. Opening the moon roof to her car, she sat staring up into the night sky. She liked being here. It reminded her of Derek and the night of their first date.

She snuck into the house at 2am in the morning, being careful not to wake Izzie. Exhausted from the events of the previous night, she turned off her alarm clock and collapsed onto her bed.

It was mid-afternoon before Meredith made it into work. She was changing in the locker room when Cristina came charging in.

Rubbing her neck, she said "Ugh, I am _so_ glad I get off in three hours." Turning to look at Meredith, she said "What are you doing in so late?"

"I have the late shift today," she replied.

"You look like shit. Didn't the date with the Vet go well?"

"It went okay, I think," she said, pulling her top over her head.

"You think? You don't know if it went well or not?" she asked, being her usual sarcastic self.

"I ended it with him," she mumbled softly.

"You did what with him?" Cristina yelled.

"Shh! I broke it off with Finn, okay? Go ahead and gloat," she said.

"I don't gloat, but I will say that it's about time! Now you can go running to McDreamy and have McBabies together. And don't try to deny that Shepherd isn't the reason for the split."

"Wh—how do you _know_ these things?" Meredith asked, shocked that Cristina could always read her so well. "Am I _that_ transparent?"

"Yes."

"Seriously?...Seriously! Do you think people know?" Meredith asked, freaking out.

"Relax. No one knows, not even Barbie. _I_ know because I'm Cristina Yang and you're you," she said, giving her a knowing look. "You might want to ease off on the eye sex. Even I was getting hot and bothered watching the two of you do the surgical resection from the gallery last week."

Meredith gave an inward groan and pulled her hair into a ponytail.

"So tell me, Mer. What does the future hold for Mr. and Mrs. McDreamy?" asked Cristina, relishing in making Meredith squirm.

"I haven't decided if I'm going to tell him yet. I want to see if we can be friends…try it out and see how we do," she said, ignoring the look Cristina shot her.

"Try it out? You make him sound like a pair of shoes." Cristina said, laughing at how naïve Meredith was being. "Tell him about McVet and get on with the honeymoon already!"

"I'll tell him…soonish," said Meredith, moving to walk out of the locker room.

* * *

Derek was looking for Meredith. She left so suddenly yesterday that he didn't get a chance to talk to her about their marriage. Talking to her about Addison got him thinking about the circumstances of their own marriage. As much as it pains him, he's finally accepted the fact that Meredith has a boyfriend and aside from the occasional flirting, she was not emotionally available to him. He needed to cut his loses and move on. 

He saw Izzie walking down the hallway and called out to her "Dr. Stevens!"

Izzie heard her name being called and turned to see Derek standing there. She walked up to him, smiled and said "Do you need something, Dr. Shepherd?"

"Yes. I was wondering if you knew where Mer—Dr. Grey was? I have been looking everywhere for her, but it seems she's nowhere to be found."

"I haven't seen her since yesterday. I didn't hear her come home last night so she probably stayed over at Finn's," said Izzie, not realizing that what she said literally made Derek's heart break.

She started to walk away, then paused to turn around and said "I think she's working the late shift today."

Derek looked at his watch and guessed that she should be here since her shift is about to start. He thanked Izzie and started heading in the direction of the locker room.

* * *

Meredith and Cristina were walking out of the locker room when the literally ran into Derek. 

"Derek!" Meredith said, shocked to see him.

"Good afternoon, Dr. Grey…Dr. Yang," he said, giving them a polite nod.

"H-how have you been?" Meredith asked, still a little breathless at the sight of him.

"Good," he replied, his eyes devouring the sight of her.

"Good." Meredith said, smiling at him

"Uh…Meredith was just telling me about her night last night," Cristina piped up, causing the both of them to look at her.

"I was?" Meredith asked, confused.

"Yes you were. Remember?" Cristina gave her a pointed look.

"I'm sorry to interrupt. I'll leave you two to talk," Derek said, thinking he had intruded on them.

"No!" yelled Meredith. Lowering her voice, she said "You're not interrupting anything at all. Please don't go."

"Alright," said Derek, smiling at her. His happiness at her asking him to stay was clearly evident in his facial expression.

"Oh for crying out loud, just tell him that you dumped the Vet already!" yelled Cristina, before she stormed off mumbling something about "eye sex".

Derek and Meredith stood staring after Cristina, speechless at her sudden outburst.

"I'm sorry about Cristina," apologized Meredith.

"Don't apologize for Dr. Yang. It's actually nice and refreshing to have someone be so…honest," he finished, smiling sweetly at her. Derek made a mental note to remind himself to thank Dr. Yang later.

"I…um…should go," she said. "My shift has already started."

Meredith didn't know why she said that. The truth was that she didn't want to leave. She wanted to stay and be with him. Cristina, in all her bluntness, had just given her the opportunity to tell Derek the truth about Finn and yet she was hesitating.

"Before you go, can I ask you something?" said Derek, moving to stand closer to her.

"Sure," she said, feeling the heat from his body as he moved closer still.

"Is it true?" he whispered in her ear.

Meredith knew what he was asking of her. She thought about it for a few seconds, letting herself recover from the feel of his warm breath against her skin before answering "Yes."

"Okay," said Derek, his smile broadening as he moved away.

"Okay," she replied, waiting for him to say something else. When he didn't, she backed away, slightly disappointed and said "I really should go now."

He gave her a polite smile and nodded his head. Meredith took a few steps backwards and fled around the corner. She was finding it difficult to breathe and needed to escape. His reaction to hearing the news about Finn was not what she had hoped. Was he over her? Did she misread all the signs he'd been giving her over the past few weeks? What about the elevator kissing and the eye sex? She was so confused and preoccupied with all the thoughts running through her head that she didn't pay attention to where she was going. All she knew was that she needed to get as far away from him as possible. She rounded the corner and smacked right into Cristina.

"What the hell!" Cristina yelled, annoyed at nearly being mowed down.

"Cristina…," said Meredith, bending over to rest her hands on her thighs to help catch her breath.

"What happened?" asked Cristina.

"He…he…doesn't want me," she said, still struggling to get air back into her lungs.

Pulling Meredith over to the empty chairs in the waiting room, she asked "Did you tell him about Finn?"

"Yes…," she said, tears forming in her eyes.

"And what did he say?"

"He said "okay"."

"You told him you dumped the vet for him and all he could say was "okay"?" repeated Cristina.

Meredith nodded, afraid to open her mouth to speak because if she did, the tears were sure to fall.

"That McBastard!"

Taking a deep breath, Meredith stood up and said "I have to go. I need to prep for surgery." She gave Cristina an appreciative half-smile and walked away.

* * *

Meredith was exhausted. She'd spent the last few hours in two back-to-back surgeries and didn't get out until 11pm. She usually liked working the late shift because the hospital isn't as chaotic, but tonight all she wanted to do was crawl into the comfort of her bed and disappear from the world. Her shift wasn't due to end for another three hours and her patients were stable, so she decided to make use of the on-call room. Dragging her feet across the hall to the on-call room, she opened the door and let out a welcomed sigh at the dark room. She saw the faint outline of the bed and didn't see anyone lying there, so she closed the door and stumbled her way in the darkness over to the bed. Kicking off her shoes, she moved to lie down, letting her muscles relax at the feel of the soft bed beneath her aching body. 

"I should warn you that I'm a married man," said a deep male voice that she clearly recognized.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	11. Chapter 11

"Derek!" she shrieked, startled at the feel of his body lying next to hers. Blinking her eyes to adjust to the darkness, she turned and said "You scared the hell out of me. How did you know it was me?" She knew it was a stupid question since he probably saw her silhouette from the light in the hallway when she walked in.

"You hair," he answered.

"My hair?"

"I remember its scent."

"What are--," she started to say before she felt his finger on her lips, silencing her.

"Before you say anything else, there's something I've wanted to do all day." He leaned down and replaced the finger that was on her lips with his own.

A soft moan escaped her lips when she felt the pressure of his lips moving over hers. Derek smiled against her lips and increased the pressure, using his tongue to coax her lips apart. Meredith let out another moan and reaching up, she ran her fingers through the soft dark curls of his hair before pulling his head further down.

"Derek…," she sighed his name. "I didn't think you wanted me anymore."

"Not want you?" he asked, leaning back on his elbow to look at her. The room was still dark, except for the sliver of light coming from underneath the door. "I've wanted you from the first moment you fell into my arms."

"But this afternoon when you found out about Finn, you acted like it didn't matter to you," she said nervously.

"It took a lot of self-control to keep from pulling you into my arms and kissing you senseless. _You_ are a hard person to resist, Meredith Grey," he said, lowering his head once again to mate with hers.

"I've missed you so much," she said, tears of happiness forming in her eyes. She shifted their positions so that he was lying on the bed while she sat, straddling him. She could feel his erection through the thin fabric of her scrubs. She ran her fingers down his chest and moved underneath his top, letting her fingers lightly graze his abdomen as her hands moved back up, taking the fabric with her.

Their breathing became ragged as the intensity of their excitement grew. Reaching down, Derek yanked his top off and tossed it carelessly onto the ground. He moved his hands to her hips, his fingers splayed across the smooth skin of her tiny waist. Giving her waist a light squeeze, his hands continued to move further up to cup her breasts through the lace of her bra.

Meredith's skin was heated and flushed from their lovemaking and with a frustrated sigh she pulled her top off and tossed it onto the floor. Derek released his hands from her breasts and moved up to cup her face, gently pulling it down for a passionate kiss. Meredith let out a satisfied moan when she felt his erection pushing up against her and began to move her hips back and forth, increasing the pace when she heard him let out a moan.

Unable to take the wait any longer, Derek moved them once again so he was on top of her. He lowered his head and instead of moving to her lips, he began to trail hot kisses down the length of her neck, stopping occasionally to suck and nip at her soft skin.

They were interrupted by an incessant beeping sound that seemed to be coming from underneath Meredith. Feeling around her, Meredith found her pager and looked at the display.

"I have to go. It's a 911 for my patient in 2203," she said, against his ear.

Derek was resting his head between the crook of her neck and knew he should move, but he didn't want to let her go.

"Derek, did you hear me? I said I need to go," she said, giving his shoulder a light shake.

"I know," he said, his warm breath tickling her skin. "I'm just not ready to move from here just yet."

Moving out from underneath him, she planted a light kiss on his lips and fumbled in the dark for her top. Derek stood up and snaked his arm around her waist, pulling her back into the warmth of his body.

"Have dinner with me tomorrow," he said, kissing her deeply.

"I, uh…I don't…," she said, trying to think straight while he continued to trail kisses down her neck. "I can't think when you're doing that."

"Don't think. Just say yes…," he said between kisses.

Meredith was getting aroused again and letting out an agonized sigh, she breathed out a soft "Yes."

"See? It's not hard to say "yes" once you get the hang of it." He was teasing her and Meredith knew she needed to make her escape before they end up in bed again.

"We'll talk later." She opened the door and turned to give him one last look, taking in the sight of him standing there shirtless. She gave him a sweet smile and left.

* * *

It was nearing the end of her shift the following day, when Cristina walked up and plopped herself down on one of the chair at the nurse's station. 

"So you wanna go to Joe's?" she asked, pulling her hair free of the clip that held it together at the base of her neck. "I need a drink."

"I can't. I have a thing," Meredith said, trying to keep the smile from forming on her lips. She and Derek were going on their first official date tonight.

"You have a thing," repeated Cristina, turning around in her chair to give Meredith a questioning look.

"I have a thing," she said, lowering her gaze.

"And does this "thing" involve McDreamy?" she asked, giving her a measured look.

"It does."

"_Your_ McDreamy? The one you were crying to me about yesterday."

"I know what you're thinking, but that was a misunderstanding. He and I are going on our first official date tonight."

"Imagine that. A _married_ couple going on their "first official" date together." Cristina said with her usual dry humor.

"I know our relationship is anything but conventional, but…," Cristina interrupted her before she could finish explaining.

"Conventional? You mean not everyone gets shit-faced drunk in Vegas and wake up to find themselves married to the first hot guy they meet?" she teased. "The drink Tequila Sunrise must have a whole new meaning for you."

"Ha ha...very funny," she said, smiling at how her friend could make the most sordid things seem funny.

"I know," she said. Spinning around in the chair, she stood up and said "Have fun on your date. Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Wait! You already did." At that moment she ducked, narrowly missing the eraser Meredith threw at her. Her laugh could still be heard as she disappeared around the corner.

* * *

Derek was sitting in the lobby typing on his blackberry when Meredith walked up. He placed the blackberry into his coat pocket and stood up as she came near. 

"Are you ready for our date?" he asked, giving her a devilish grin.

"I'm not sleeping with you. Not tonight," she said, trying not to laugh at the disappointed look on his face.

"How about tomorrow night?"

"Perhaps," she responded.

"In that case, I have this sudden need to postpone our date until tomorrow," he teased.

"If you keep this up, you may not get lucky…ever!" she warned him. "We need this date, Derek. I need to know if we're compatible."

Leaning down to whisper in her ear, he said "We both know we're more than compatible." He kissed her earlobe before pulling back to smile at her.

Meredith's legs nearly gave out. He was being sexy and charming and she was already having a hard time resisting him. This was going to be a long night, but she needed to know if there something more than sex between them.

"Stop doing that!" she yelled.

"Stop doing what?" he asked innocently.

"Stop being charming and dreamy, and…and…," she let out a frustrated sigh. "I need to know there's more to us than the kissing in elevators and sex in the on-call room and the eye sex!"

"Eye sex?" he asked, giving her a questioning look. He likes it when she gets flustered. She tends to ramble, which he finds endearing.

"Wh-what? I didn't say that," she denied. She hates it when she rambles because she has a tendency to say things she doesn't want said.

"You said eye sex."

"I did not! And that's not the point!" She was feeling trapped by her own admission to having eye sex and wished she could crawl into a hole and hide.

"Relax Meredith," he said, running his hand through her hair to rest at the back of her neck. "I understand what you're trying to say." He heard her let out a sigh of relief. "And just for the record, what we have is chemistry…_great_ chemistry. Don't be embarrassed by it."

"I'm not," she said.

"Good. Now are you ready to go?" he said, putting his arm on her lower back to escort her out.

"Dr. Shepherd!" They both turned to see a nurse running in their direction. The nurse stopped a few feet from them to catch her breath. She gave Meredith a curious look, then turned to Derek and said "I'm glad I caught you before you left. Mr. Curtis suffered another massive seizure earlier. He and his wife have agreed to have the surgery, but only if you do it tonight."

Derek was happy to hear his patient finally agreed to the operation. He had a spent a good part of his day trying to convince them to have the life-saving operation. He turned to Meredith and asked "Would you like to scrub in to assist on a corpus callosotomy?"

"Are you kidding me? I'd love it!"

He turned to the nurse and instructed her to get the OR prepped. She gave him a nod and ran off.

"I guess we _will_ have to postpone our date to tomorrow," he said, winking at her.

"I'm still not sleeping with you," she said, giving him a flirtatious smile.

"Spoilsport!"

* * *

An hour into the surgery, Meredith regretted telling him about the eye sex. He used every opportunity he had to give her suggestive looks with his eyes. Looks that told her exactly what he was thinking. Again, she found herself getting aroused and avoiding eye contact with him no longer worked. She was getting excited at the mere fact that he was standing a few feet from her. Feeling the heat rise in her cheeks, she began to fidget and shifted from foot to foot. 

"Are you feeling okay, Dr. Grey? Your face is a little flushed. Do you need us to turn up the air conditioning?" he asked, smiling to himself.

_Bastard!_

"I'm fine. I just have a—"

"Itch?" he asked, giving her a bigger grin.

_Bastard!_

"Actually, I was going to say I have a pain in my a—"

"Okay!" he said, clearing his throat. He gave her a look letting her know she won.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	12. Chapter 12

The next morning, Meredith was frantically searching in the glove compartment of her car looking for her ID badge when Cristina snuck up behind her.

"Hey!"

Startled by the sudden outburst, she raised her head and bumped it hard against the roof of the car. "Ouch!" she yelled, silently cursing to herself before turning to give Cristina a stern look. "What the hell was that for?" she snarled, rubbing the top of her head.

"Why are you so high strung this morning? Wasn't the sex what you expected?" teased Cristina as they walked together into the hospital.

"We didn't have sex," she replied, still annoyed at her.

"No sex, huh?" she asked, giving her a sympathetic smile. "Is _that_ why you are high strung?"

"I'm _not_ high strung and it's _not_ because of the sex or lack thereof!" she yelled right as the elevator doors opened to reveal Izzie and an older couple standing inside. The couple exchanged looks, trying not to laugh.

Meredith gave an inward groan and walked inside with Cristina in tow.

"So you're not having sex either?" asked Izzie, oblivious to the fact that the couple were still in the elevator with them. "I haven't had sex for so long, I think I forgot how it goes."

"Izzie!" she yelled when she heard the couple trying to laugh quietly to themselves. Meredith closed her eyes and wished that she was anywhere but here.

As soon as the elevator doors opened, she ran out leaving Izzie and Cristina to stare after her. She ran into the bathroom and splashed water over her face. She hated to admit it, but Cristina was right. She _was_ feeling frustrated and it was because of a very handsome doctor here. She was starting to think her "no sex" rule may not be such a good idea after all. Last night, he really laid the charm on thick. Even after she shot him down, he continued to play eye sex with her.

She changed and headed over to the OR board to check her schedule. She smiled when she saw her name next to his for the spinal stenosis operation for the morning. Her smiled broadened as an idea popped into her head. She was going to make him pay for what he did last night. Oh yeah…he was going to squirm.

_It's time you got your due, Dr. Shepherd._

* * *

Meredith walked into the scrub room right as Derek was finishing up sterilizing his hands. Without looking at him, she put her mask on and walked over to the sink to sterilize her own hands. She could feel his eyes on her, but kept from looking at him. 

"Are you ready?' he asked, using his elbow to push the button to open the door to the OR.

Walking up, she ever-so-lightly brushed her body against his and looking deep into his eyes, she smiled and said "I'm always ready, Dr. Shepherd."

Derek was taken aback by the bold move she just made. She took a few steps inside the room, turned and gave him a slow, suggestive wink. Derek was confused by her odd behavior. He stood at the entrance of the room watching her as the nurse assisted with her gown. After a few more seconds, he moved to walk into the room when the doors closed on him. Meredith saw the confused look on his face through the glass and laughed quietly to herself. Phase one of her plan was working perfectly.

Clearing his throat, he pushed the button again and walked into the room. "Good morning, everyone. Today is a beautiful day to save lives."

To no one's surprise, they operated perfectly together. Their movements were in perfect rhythm with one another. The surgery was going very smoothly and it appeared they weren't going to need as much time to do the repair as they had originally anticipated.

Derek was focused on what he was doing, but something else was occupying his mind. Meredith was being extra attentive and she was now the one giving him eye sex. He liked the looks she gave him, but as the hours passed her looks became bolder and more suggestive. It was becoming quite the struggle to keep an erection from coming on. He was very grateful that he had a gown over his scrub pants. He would never live this down if the nursing staff knew what was really going on underneath the gown.

"If I forget to tell you later, I really do appreciate you letting me scrub in with you," said Meredith, turning up to look at him.

"It's my pleasure," he said.

"Oh no, doctor. It is most definitely _my pleasure_." She leaned in and whispered the last few words so that he was the only one that heard.

"Th-thank you," he stuttered, not sure how to respond to her.

"And I must say you are _very_ good with your hands."

"Are…are you okay?" he asked, raising his brow with a questioning look.

"Never better," she smiled again.

Clearing his throat, Derek looked around and asked "Is it hot in here?" When no one answered he said in a rather frustrated voice "Can we, um…pump up the air conditioning?"

If Meredith had a victory dance, she would be doing it right now. Phase two was working better than planned. It was nearing the end of the surgery and Derek was getting ready to stitch the patient back up.

"Dr. Shepherd. I hope you don't think I'm being too bold, but could I do the running whip stitch?"

"Sure," he said before reaching his hands out to give her the instrument.

Meredith gave him another sweet smile and reached for it, but not before she let her fingers lightly touch and stroke the inside of his hand. Derek yanked his hand back as if he had been burned by her touch. He was letting himself get way too distracted.

"I think I may have to move to your side in order to do this," she said.

"Of course," he said, his voice laced with sexual frustration. He proceeded to move out of her way, but she stopped him.

"Um…I may need you close in case I need help," she said innocently.

Against his better judgment, he stayed where he was. She reached over his arm a little further than necessary and for a brief moment, he felt her breast graze his upper arm. Derek nearly lost it. He was so aroused all he wanted to do was grab her and kiss her until neither of them could breathe.

Meredith was thoroughly enjoying herself. It was nice to see him squirm for once. Looking down, she saw a faint outline of what appears to be a very large bulge pushing against his gown. Hearing his ragged breathing through his mask, she asked "Is the temperature okay for you, doctor? You still look a little flushed."

Derek gave her a suspicious look. Suddenly, it dawned on him what she was doing. She was paying him back for last night. She read him the riot act after surgery for using eye sex and even made him promise to be professional when they were in surgery. She laid on the guilt and made him feel like a complete ass and now she was doing the exact same thing. He was going to make her pay. Two can play this game.

"I'm fine. I appreciate that you are so concerned with making me, er…comfortable," he said, his voice still strained from the fact that his damn erection still hadn't gone down.

"Always a pleasure," she replied. "I owe you for letting me do the stitching."

Leaning in closer to her, his arm brushed up against the underside of her breast, he said in a voice low enough so that no one else standing by heard "Yes, you owe me and I will see you tonight about collecting on your debt."

Meredith's pulse began beating wildly in her chest. His last words left her feeling both excited and apprehensive. She knew she crossed the line, but she wanted to teach him a lesson. Suddenly, being in such close proximity with him was affecting her. She sped through with the stitching which caused her hand to slip slightly. Quickly recovering, she moved away but Derek was not going to let her get away so easily.

Reaching around, he placed his hands on hers and said "Doing the running whip stitch can be a little tricky," he looked at her when he said the last word and continued "but if you take it nice and slow, it will come very naturally to you."

"Um, I think I got it," she said, trying to pull her hands away.

"It's _very_ tricky unless you get the hang of it. You wouldn't mind if I help guide you through the first few strokes," he teased, holding onto her hands tighter. "You have a lot of promise, Dr. Grey. It would be an honor for me to teach you _everything_ I know."

Together they finished up the stitching. Meredith handed the instrument to the nurse and backed away from him. She needed to get out of there…fast!

"Th-thank you, Dr. Shepherd," she said, barely able to get the words out.

"_My_ pleasure," he said, looking deep into her eyes. Turning to address the rest of the team, he smiled and said "Great job, everyone!"

Meredith took the opportunity to run into the scrub room and rinse off before he got there. She barely had the chance to let out a sigh of relief when he came striding in through the door. Tossing the gloves into the trash bin, he took off the mask and looked at her as she scrubbed her hands with the sanitizing soap.

"Ah…that was fun," he said, breaking the silence.

"Fun?" she said, giving him a sideways glance. "Oh yes. It was fun learning how to do the running whip stitch," she said, keeping up the pretense.

Derek gave her a curious look. He wasn't sure if she was still pretending or not.

"It was very thoughtful of you to step in and show me how to do it. I didn't realize my strokes were too fast. I've never had complaints before," she said. She knew she was playing with fire, but she was damned if she was going to let him win.

Derek watched her as she fidgeted with her watch. He knew it was something she does when she's nervous or hiding something. He didn't like the way she said the last statement. It filled him with a jealous rage but if she was going to play, then so will he.

"I see," he said, moving to stand next to her by the sink. He purposely moved so that their thighs were touching. He could hear her ragged breathing and knew she was as affected by the contact as he was. "There is a lot I could teach you. If you're willing to learn, that is"

He flashed his dreamy smile, began to wash his hands and asked "Speaking of which, what time is our date tonight?"

Meredith started panting softly. She desperately needed to get out of there. She quickly dried her hands and yanked the door open. "We'll talk later, okay?" she asked and turned to leave before he had a chance to respond.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	13. Chapter 13

Later that afternoon, Cristina was walking by a patient's room when she spotted Meredith sitting in the corner eating a sandwich.

"What are you doing eating in really old guy's room?" she asked, walking into the room.

"Hiding," replied Meredith with a mouthful of bread in her mouth.

"Why are you hiding and from who?" asked Cristina, being her usual nosey self.

"Derek," she replied, giving Cristina a guilty look.

"Ah… Does this have anything to do with the hot, near sex or whatever it was you two were doing in surgery earlier? They tell me the windows were getting steamy from all the heat you two were generating," she said, giving Meredith a devilish smirk.

"You heard?" Meredith asked, giving her a pained look.

"Are you kidding me? The whole hospital is talking about it. Even Psych is talking and you know they have some crazy shit going on up there." Sitting down on the chair, she crossed her legs on the bed and gave Meredith an interested look. "So tell me."

"It was supposed to be innocent payback," she explained. "I had this brilliant…okay, so _maybe_ a not-so-brilliant idea to make him squirm for using eye sex to make me uncomfortable last night. He deliberately flirted with me after I told him about the eye sex and I wanted to make him pay--"

"Wait!" Cristina interrupted. "You _told_ him about eye sex?"

"Yes."

Cristina nearly fell off the chair from laughing so hard.

"It's not funny!" said Meredith, although she couldn't deny that it wasn't somewhat funny.

"Oh yes it is," said Cristina, stopping long enough to breathe before laughing again. "Did this brilliant, beyond brilliant plan of yours work?"

"No. It backfired. He caught on and turned the tables on me," she said defensively.

"And now you're hiding," said Cristina, trying hard to keep from laughing. She could tell her friend was in agony over this.

"Now I'm hiding."

"It'll blow over as soon as they have something new to talk about. Just try not to have sex in the OR when there's an audience around, okay?" she flashed her a joking smile and walked out the room.

Meredith finished her sandwich and got ready to return to work. She peeked outside the door to look around the hallway to make sure the coast was clear before walking out. She could hear the nurses giggling as she walked by, but she kept her chin up.

"Dr. Grey!" she heard her name and winced when she recognized the voice. Picking up her pace, she turned the corner and kept walking.

"Dr. Grey!" the voice called again.

_Crap!_

She felt someone grip her arm and pulled her inside a room. Turning around, she winced again when she saw that she was in the on-call room. The _same_ on-call room in which she nearly had sex with Derek not too long ago.

Letting out an exasperated sigh, she said "What do you want, Derek?"

"I want to talk about this morning."

"What's there to talk about? We—"

"No!" he said, pinning her up against the door. "No more denial! No more teasing! No more eye sex and then running away! I want you and I don't want to play these games anymore!"

Derek spent all afternoon running through his head what he was going to say when he saw her. He was going to be calm and rational in the hopes of convincing her to give their relationship a chance. But all that flew out the window as soon as he saw her. None of what he had planned to say came out. Instead, he sounded frustrated and demanding and may have just ruined his only chance.

Running his fingers through his tousled hair, he released her arms and took a few steps back. He saw her rub her arms and felt like a bigger ass for hurting her. "I'm so sorry, Meredith. Did I hurt you?"

She shook her head, unable to speak. She was trying to wrap her mind around what he had just said. She couldn't deny that he was right. All this teasing and eye sex was not good for either of them. As she stood there, she could see that he was visibly shaking. She could tell that he felt bad for yelling and being physical with her.

Feeling around behind her, she turned the lock on the door. Derek opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Moving away from the door, she began walking in his direction her eyes never leaving his.

"You're right. No more denial. No more teasing. No more eye sex…well, perhaps a little eye sex," she said with a wicked grin. "You and me…it's not a game." Once she reached him, she put her hand on his chest and gently pushed him until his back touched the wall.

"Meredith. I can't take this anymore."

"No more talking," she said.

Standing on tiptoes, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him hard. All her pent-up frustrations went into that kiss. She could feel Derek's body stiffen, his lips unyielding. Breaking the kiss, she looked at him, worried that he was going to turn her away. For what seemed like an eternity, they stood looking at each other, their breathing ragged from the kiss. The fear of losing him terrified her and with a new sense of determination, she reached up and kissed him again.

"Derek, please…" she said against his lips. "Please don't turn me away."

Whatever resolve Derek had soon disappeared. Taking control, he moved so that she was pinned between the wall and his body. Reaching down, he pulled her scrub top off and moved his hands to untie the string to her pants causing the material to pool at her feet. Meredith stepped out of them and kicked it off to the side. Leaning back, he gave her body an appreciative look, taking in the sight of her standing there in nothing but a lacy bra and thong.

Meredith reached out for him, but he stopped her. "Not yet."

Bending down, he kissed the smooth lines of her neck, moving further down to her collarbone, and across the contours of her shoulder. Meredith let out a soft moan at the feel of his hot lips against her skin. She felt his fingers move underneath the flimsy straps of her bra and inch by agonizing inch, began to draw them off her shoulders. Derek dipped his head between the valley of her breasts and began to kiss and nip at the soft skin just above the edge of her bra.

Meredith let out another agonized moan, teetering on the edge of heaven and hell. "Derek, please don't make me wait any longer."

Releasing the straps, he moved his hand behind her back and in one quick movement he unclasped her bra letting it fall to the ground between them. Bending down, he trailed hot kisses along her flat stomach and hooked his fingers on each side of her thong. He pulled them down and off and moved back up to kiss her. Meredith opened her mouth, welcoming the invasion of his tongue as it moved against hers.

It was then that he stripped himself of all his clothing. He moved closer so their bodies were touching and Meredith let out a gasp when she felt his erection pushing against her stomach. Lacing her arms around his neck, she shifted her weight and wrapped legs around his hips. Derek put his hands on the underside of her thighs to support her and thrust into her.

Meredith nearly fainted at the feel of him inside her. His movements were slow at first, then increased as he felt her muscles contract around him. He continued to pump into her until he felt her come, only to thrust faster and harder to make her orgasm last longer.

"Derek, I love…," she moaned, but lost her train of thought when she felt the second wave of her orgasm come. "Oh my God, Derek!" she screamed. Derek kissed her to silence her screaming and moaning. He continued to thrust into her until he came.

Meredith didn't think it was possible, but she came again. Breaking their kiss, she trailed her lips to his shoulder and bit down on it hard to keep from screaming. Together they rode the waves, their bodies shaking from the sheer magnitude of their combined orgasms.

Feeling completely sated, Meredith slowly loosened her legs from around his waist and moved to stand up. Their breathing was ragged as they stood facing each other, their bodies inches apart. The silence was deafening as the awkwardness of the moment swept over them. Despite all the pent-up frustrations and teasing, neither one had expected it to culminate into raging hot sex.

Meredith was the first to break the silence.

"We should, um…get dressed," she said as she hurriedly scrambled for her clothes. Stealing a glance in his direction, she noticed he still hadn't moved and said with a little more force "Derek! You seriously need to get dressed before someone walks in on us."

"You locked the door, remember?" he said, before moving to gather up his own clothes.

"Right," she said, tying the string to her pants and walking over to the door.

"Don't you think we should talk about this?" he asked, trying to stop her from leaving.

"What's there to talk about? We had hot, mind-blowing sex in the middle of the work day, in the on-call room where people were likely to find us and talk about the hot sex in the on-call room that people generally use to sleep instead of having really hot…sex," she rambled on nervously.

"Meredith," he said, causing her to look at him. "What does this mean?"

_What does this mean? How the hell would I know!_

"It means I have to go back to work and so do you," she said reaching for the door handle. Letting out a defeated sigh, she turned to look at him one last time and said "We'll talk. I promise."

"Okay," he reluctantly agreed.

She gave him a weak smile and started to undo the lock when she felt someone jiggling the door handle from the other side. She pulled her hand away like it had been burned and didn't make a move. The person jiggled it again with a little more force and when it didn't open, she heard someone ask "Is someone in there?"

_Shit!_

Turning to Derek, she whispered "It's Izzie!"

Derek gave her a confused look and whispered back "Who?"

"Dr. Stevens!" she replied. Moving closer to him, she lowered her voice even more and said "She can't find us in here together."

"I don't think we have much of a choice in the matter. There's only one way out," he said, gesturing to the door.

_Double shit!_

"Hello! Is someone in there?" Izzie called out from the other side of the door.

"This is bad. Really, really bad," she said, fidgeting nervously with her watch.

"Just open the door. We're married and it's time people knew about it," said Derek.

"No!" she hissed. "No one can know that we're married. They can _never_ know."

"What's wrong with people knowing that we're married?" he asked, slightly angered by her reaction.

"They just can't, that's all. Please do me this one favor and not say anything," she pleaded with him.

Derek wasn't too happy about hiding it, but he nodded his head in agreement. He was damn well going to talk to her about this later. Together they listened to see if Izzie was still there and after a few more minutes of silence, they figured she gave up and left.

Letting out a sigh of relief at the near-miss, she turned to him and said "Okay. I'm going to go out first and you wait a few minutes after I've gone before coming out."

Moving to the door, she unlocked it and opened it an inch to peek outside to make sure the coast was clear. When she didn't see Izzie standing there, she opened the door further and walked out.

"Meredith! That was you in there?" asked Izzie, coming up to stand in front of her. "Why didn't you open the door?"

"I'm sorry, Iz. I didn't hear you knock," she lied, silently berating herself for her stupidity.

"Okay…" replied Izzie, looking at her strangely.

"Was there something that you needed?" she asked, looking past Izzie's shoulders hoping to see Derek walk out. When she didn't see him, she let out a sigh of relief thinking he probably left already.

"I think I left my phone in there earlier."

"Okay, well I gotta run," she said, quickly walking away.

Izzie watched her as she turned the corner and thought she was acting weird. Turning on her heel, she began to walk towards the door and as she opened it, she collided right into Derek.

"Dr. Shepherd!" she exclaimed in surprise at seeing him in the room. "I didn't know you were in here." She looked at him, then turned to look down the hall that Meredith disappeared to and wondered if they were in here together.

"Dr. Stevens. I'm sorry I locked the door. I had a bit of a rough morning and wanted to get some undisturbed sleep," he explained.

"Was Mer--?" She was going to ask about Meredith, but decided against it "Nevermind." Moving aside to let him out, she said "I hope you got the rest you needed."

"I still feel a little worked up, but thank you for asking. Have a good day, Dr. Stevens." He flashed his dreamy smile and walked off.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review.**


	14. Chapter 14

Meredith was sitting in really old guy's room, when Izzie walked past the door and saw her. She took a few steps back and walked in.

"Hey! What are you doing in really old guy's room? Are you hiding?" she asked, grinning at Meredith.

"I'm not hiding. I just need some peace and quiet," she said, looking at Izzie hoping she would take the hint.

Holding her hands up in fake surrender, she slowly backed out of the room and said "Okay, I get the not-so-subtle hint. Cristina's right. You need sex. Maybe that will help loosen you up."

_I did! I had hot, mind-blowing, orgasmic sex and all it did was make me more high-strung._

"Thanks, Iz. I'll take that under advisement," she said, giving her a fake appreciative smile.

"No problem, babe," she said, winking at her. "By the way, we're having dinner together tonight."

"Dinner?" asked Meredith, confused.

"Yes dinner. You know, it's what normal people typically do when they live together. We haven't had dinner together for so long and I'm itching to bake. So, yes we're having dinner. Cristina will be there and it'll be like old times."

"But…" Meredith began to protest, then began to think it may not be such a bad idea. She'd been thinking of ways to get out of her dinner with Derek tonight and this could be her excuse. "Fine. I'll be there."

"Good," she said, pleased with herself. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go tell Cristina she's coming over for dinner."

Meredith left really old guy's room and went searching for Derek. She knew he wasn't going to like that she's canceling their date, but she didn't want to rouse any suspicions with Izzie. It was bad enough that she almost caught them earlier.

* * *

Derek was sitting alone in his office. He was flipping through a patient's chart, but his mind was elsewhere. Ever since this afternoon, she was all he could think about. Normally, he liked thinking about her. Thinking about her makes him happy so that even the crappiest day is tolerable. Right now, as he's sitting there thinking about her, he's feeling anything but happy. Instead, he's feeling angry, frustrated, confused, and insecure. The idea of anyone making him feel insecure was completely absurd to him. He's a talented, world-renowned neurosurgeon. People like him don't let petite green-eyed blonds with tiny ineffectual fists get them so frustrated to the point of feeling insecure. Yet here he is, sitting in his semi-dark office absently thumbing through patient charts, letting that exact emotion overwhelm him to near suffocation.

This afternoon when he pulled her into the on-call room, he had every intention of talking to her. Never in his wildest dreams did he imagine they'd have sex. Don't get him wrong, the sex was good. Hell, it was damn near explosive. And although he hesitated at first, he gave in because in some sick warped way, he thought that could be the key to convincing her to give them a real chance.

All his hopes were shot to hell when she insisted that no one must know they were married. And to add insult to injury, she made him promise never to say anything. It's no wonder he's feeling confused and insecure.

He let out a long exasperated sigh and reached inside the top drawer of his desk to pull out his wallet. Flipping it open, he reached inside one of the card insert and pulled out the familiar gold band. The same wedding band that bound him to Meredith in holy matrimony. Something caught his eye as he moved to close the wallet. Tucked deep inside the same card insert was a small photo. It was a candid photo taken of him and Addison at their wedding. Taking a closer look at the picture, he couldn't help but smile, remembering how young and in love they were back then.

Sitting back in his chair, he held up the ring in one hand and the picture in the other. He let out a bitter laugh because he was now convinced that Fate hated him. Yes, she must hate him to put him with two women that are so different from one another, yet both still manage to make him feel like a useless piece of shit whose feelings were of no significance to them. His ex-wife screwed with him emotionally by cheating on him with his best friend, while his current wife is just screwing him.

He's not going to allow himself to be used like that. Not ever again. That is why he's going to end it with Meredith. He'll ask her for a divorce as soon as he sees her. Her reaction from this afternoon spoke volumes and told him what he needed to know. It was very obvious that she doesn't want anything beyond the occasional lay and he's not prepared to enter into another emotionless relationship. He tried that with Addison and lived in hell for six long agonizing months. If he stays with Meredith, he will undoubtedly be the one to get hurt. He can't love someone who clearly doesn't love him back.

He placed the ring and photo back inside his wallet and tossed it carelessly into the drawer. Running his hands through his hair, he leaned back against the soft cushion and closed his eyes. He was physically and emotionally drained. His mind is telling him to walk away, while his heart wants to give it another try.

He thought about the conversation they had before they were interrupted. Maybe if they had more time, he would have been able to talk to her. They're supposed to go to dinner tonight. He could use the time to gauge whether this relationship is worth pursuing or not and a lot of that will depend on how open she is to trying.

* * *

Meredith was about to give up looking for Derek when she walked past his office. She didn't remember seeing his name on the OR board earlier, so she decided to try his office. It was nearing the end of her shift and she didn't want to leave without talking to him first. She was about to knock on the door when it abruptly opened to reveal a disheveled looking Derek standing before her. She noticed that his hair was in disarray and his eyes were red.

"Hi. I've been looking for you," she said, giving him a tentative smile.

Derek wasn't expecting to see her standing at his doorstep so he stood staring at her, momentarily speechless.

"Derek?" Are you okay?" she asked, looking worried.

Clearing his throat, he said "Er, yes I'm fine. Do you need something?"

"What?" she asked, slightly taken aback by the cold tone in his voice.

"You said you were looking for me," he reminded her.

Lowering her eyes from his, she said "I wanted to talk to you about…about our date tonight."

"Oh," he said, softening his voice. "I have a staff meeting with the Chief that I'm already running late to," he said looking at his watch. "I'll call you when I'm done. You pick a place, okay?" He smiled at her and began to walk towards the elevator.

"Actually, I came to tell you I can't make it tonight!" she yelled after him.

Derek stopped in mid-stride and turned to look at her.

"You're canceling our date? Why!" he asked, ignoring the looks from the nurses standing nearby. He was hurt and disappointed and didn't care if everyone knew.

Meredith knew he was angry from the scowl on his face and the way his shoulders had stiffened up. She gave the nurses a sideways glance and walked up to him.

"Please don't be angry," she said, placing a small hand on his forearm.

He yanked his arm away and said "I'm not angry! Why are you canceling?"

"It's Izzie. She made me promise to have dinner with her tonight," she said, lowering her gaze from his. She could feel his eyes burning into hers.

"What about the promise you made me?" he hissed. "We need to talk…about us." His voice was strained and he could barely contain his anger.

"Can't…can't we talk tomorrow?" she asked, almost pleading with him.

"Tomorrow will be too late," he said.

"Why is-- " She was going to ask what he meant by that.

"Nevermind. It's fine. I get it. You have commitments," he said, slowly backing away from her. "Go have dinner with your friend, Meredith. I'm late." Without giving her a chance to respond, he turned and walked away.

Meredith was near tears as she saw him walk toward the elevators. He was so angry with her.

"Derek, wait!" she yelled, running after him as he got onto the elevator. She reached it right as the doors were about to close. Shuffling herself inside, she was thankful that they were alone.

"We're done, Meredith," he said, trying to keep his eyes trained on the display panel and not look at her.

"Done?" she asked, confused by the meaning of that word.

"What do you want, Meredith!" he yelled, turning to look at her.

"What do I want?" she repeated, unable to gather her thoughts.

"Yes! What…do…you…want?!" he yelled again, emphasizing each word. He could see that she was scared and near tears, but he was too angry to care at that point. "I mean, you don't want to be with me. You sure as hell don't want to be married to me, so what do you want?"

Meredith stood watching the rise and fall of his chest, shocked and speechless at how this was turning out.

"I want--," she began to say, but he interrupted her.

"I don't want to be that guy," he said, his anger on the verge of boiling over.

"Guy?" she said, her mind failing her completely.

"Yes, Meredith! The guy you go to when you need to scratch a particular itch. I _refuse_ to be that guy. I want more! Dammit, I want…."

He grabbed her face in his hands, his lips crashing down onto hers. It was an angry kiss. A kiss meant to punish. Meredith tried to pull away, but he grabbed a tighter hold of her hair and continued to kiss her, forcing her lips apart. Suddenly, the kiss changed from anger to desperate need as he let out a moan and softened the kiss, his lips coaxing. Meredith reached up into his hair and pulled him closer to her. The fear she felt earlier was replaced by excitement. Letting out a moan, she opened her mouth further to allow his tongue access. Together they stood kissing and touching each other until the elevator doors opened.

Derek broke the kiss and giving her a sad look he walked outside the elevator and said "Forty-eight hours." He saw the look of confusion flash across her face and continued "That's the longest I'm willing to wait. You have two days to decide."

The doors closed leaving Meredith standing there feeling completely and utterly lost.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review.**


	15. Chapter 15

Derek had managed to reign in his anger by the time he reached the conference room. The Chief gave him a curious look as he walked in, seeing as how he was the last to arrive. He gave him an apologetic half-smile and took a seat at the back of the room. His mind was still reeling from what had happened in the elevator. He was angry with himself for being weak around her. Twice in one day, he tried to talk to her and both times resulted in them kissing and having sex in an on-call room. Derek let out an agonized groan and shifted in his seat when a few of the doctors turned to look at him.

"Are you okay, Dr. Shepherd?" asked the Chief, clearly annoyed by the disruption.

"I-I'm okay. I just have a slight headache, that's all," he lied.

Sitting straight up in his chair, he sat with his hands folded on top of the table, pretending to be interested in what was being said. As the meeting dragged on, he found his mind wandering back to the elevator incident. He should have ended it right then and there. Why did he give her forty-eight hours? If she didn't know how she felt by now, she sure as hell won't know in two days.

* * *

Meredith hadn't moved from the spot that she was standing in when he left. Tears were streaming down her face, but she couldn't move her hand to wipe them away. She stood there re-playing the events that just happened. He was giving her forty-eight hours to decide her fate. This type of decision is huge…monumental…and it's supposed to be decided in two days! 

The elevator doors opened to reveal an elderly woman standing there. She took one look at Meredith and asked "Are you okay, dear?" Her voice was full of concern.

Meredith raised her tear-stained face to look at her, giving her a blank stare.

"Are…are you okay?" she asked again, coming close to put a gentle hand on her arm. "Are you here to see a doctor?"

"I didn't get a chance to tell him I loved him," she mumbled pathetically to herself.

"Who, dear?"

"Der…my hus…my soon-to-be ex-whatever if I don't make a decision in two days. Isn't that crazy? Who would make someone decide something like that in two days? Who?!" She was yelling and she could tell the woman was a little shocked by her outburst.

Giving her arm a light squeeze, she said "I don't know what it is you have to decide in two days, but if you love him, it shouldn't be too hard to decide."

The elevator doors opened and she gave her arm another squeeze and said "Follow your heart. It won't lead you astray."

Meredith finally found the strength to walk to her car but instead of heading home, she went to the one place she knew would give her comfort. Belvedere Park.

* * *

She was an hour late and she knew Izzie would be upset, but she needed time alone to think. As soon as she opened the front door, she could smell the sweet aroma of what was probably one of Izzie's famous chocolate fudge cakes. She stood in the entranceway listening for any signs of activity in the kitchen, but it was completely quiet. Throwing her jacket onto the couch, she walked into the kitchen and saw the feast that Izzie had prepared laid out on the dining table. She walked over to one of the cabinets, pulled out a glass and bottle of tequila and went to sit down by the breakfast counter. Pouring herself a double shot, she downed the gold liquid letting it burn a trail all the way down into her empty stomach. She poured herself another and emptied the contents down her throat in one quick movement. 

"You're late," said Izzie, appearing at the doorway.

"I know," she replied, not looking up from the empty shot glass.

"And you're drinking on an empty stomach, no less." She moved further into the kitchen and proceeded to pull out three sets of plates and silverware.

"Where's Cristina?" Meredith asked, looking around for any signs of her.

"She's also late," she replied, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"I'm sorry, Iz. I know you spent a lot of time making dinner for us and I appre—"

"You could've called."

"I know," she said, feeling like a jerk. "What did you make? It smells good." She knew Izzie was proud of her cooking and was hoping the change of subject would cheer her up.

"Chicken Marsala," she said, smiling at her.

"Smells delicious."

"I made my famous chocolate fudge cake."

"Can we have a taste of that now?" she asked, eyeing the cake with a pleading smile at Izzie.

"Why not," she said with a light shrug of her shoulders. She went to the table and carried the cake over to the counter. Pulling out two small plates, she cut a piece for each of them and made herself confortable on the chair opposite Meredith.

"How was your day?" Meredith asked, shoving a big piece of cake into her mouth.

"Good."

"How was yours?" she asked, giving her a curious look.

"Good. It was…good," she said, plastering on a fake smile.

"Good."

"Good," agreed Meredith, putting another big piece of cake into her mouth.

"Are you going to tell me about you and Dr. Shepherd or do we sit here and pretend to have small talk for a little longer?" Izzie asked calmly before putting a small piece of cake into her mouth.

Meredith's head shot up so fast she may have given herself whiplash. The sudden move caused her to choke on the piece of cake she still had in her mouth.

"Wh-Why are you asking me that?" she stuttered. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks and got up from the chair to grab a cool drink from the fridge.

"Hm…let me think... You've been acting weird ever since we got back from Vegas. You literally flew out the door that day in the conference room when you saw him. When I saw you this afternoon, you seemed flustered and then I ran into him as I walked into the on-call room and he looked…well…he looked…angry, but in a sad sort of way."

_Derek was angry? That explains why he was so mad in the elevator._

"I've also heard things, Mer. Lots and lots of things about eye sex and running whip stitch and…other stuff," continued Izzie.

"It's complicated" said Meredith. She moved to the opposite side of the counter and handed Izzie a drink.

"Just tell me, Mer. I know I'm not your best friend like Cristina, but I'm still your friend, nonetheless."

She didn't want to talk about Derek. At least, not now after what had happened earlier. How did her life become so complicated from what was supposed to be a one-night stand? She looked at Izzie and saw the hurt in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she put her drink down and began to tell the story from the beginning.

"Do you remember the first night we were in Vegas?" she asked.

"Yes, we went to Pure."

"Cristina and I went to get drinks and I got lost on the way back to the table."

Izzie nodded her head, her interest peaked.

"I stumbled and nearly fell when he caught me." She took a sip of her drink and continued "The next night at Tao, I made an excuse to leave with Cristina because I couldn't stand all the wedding talk. Instead of returning to the hotel room with Cristina, I stayed in the casino and that's when I found the bar." She said, remembering how he looked that night.

"Go on," said Izzie, leaning in closer to Meredith.

"I had a few drinks and went into the washroom to freshen up. It was quite dark in the bar and when I returned, I tripped on a raised piece of carpet and…he caught me."

"Derek," said Izzie.

"Derek," she said, letting his name roll off her tongue. "We started talking and—," she paused, taking a deep breath. "The next thing I knew, I woke up in his hotel room…naked."

She stealed a glance in Izzie's direction, half-expecting her to preach about one-night stands but she didn't say a single word.

"We left Vegas and I tried my best to forget about him, then—"

"He showed up here," said Izzie, finishing her thought for her.

"As our new boss," she said, laughing at the irony of the situation.

"He tried to convince me to date him, but I was seeing Finn."

"You also broke up with Finn," said Izzie, her tone matter-of-fact. "Was he the reason you ended it?"

"It was never serious with Finn," she said, trying to dodge the question.

"What happened this afternoon in the on-call room?" asked Izzie, her eyes trained on Meredith.

"He…he wanted to talk about us," she said nervously.

They heard the front door open and knew it was Cristina by the sound of her bag and keys being tossed carelessly onto the floor.

Without missing a beat, Izzie said "You and Derek are—"

"So she _finally_ told you they're married," said Cristina, standing in the doorway.

Meredith shot Cristina a stern look. She purposely left out the part about them being married. After what happened today, it was too painful for her to think about it.

Izzie whipped her head around to look at Cristina, then back to glare at Meredith.

"You're married?!" she yelled.

**

* * *

Love. Hate. Review. **


	16. Chapter 16

"I guess you_ didn't_ tell her," said Cristina as she casually strolled into the kitchen and grabbed herself a beer from the fridge.

"No I didn't" she said through gritted teeth. She was trying to keep from strangling her friend. Ignoring the looks Cristina was giving her, she turned to Izzie and said "I'm so sorry, Iz. I didn't want anyone to know."

"What's the big deal?" Cristina piped up from where she was sitting by the counter.

"Shut up!" she snapped back. She was doing her best to remain calm and not let the shocked and injured look on Izzie's face affect her.

"Give me a break," said Cristina as she cut herself a big piece of cake. "He's hot, he's young, he successful, he's probably loaded, and he wants to get into your pants. Boo hoo…your life sucks."

Meredith's anger was barely contained at this point. "Okay. You're my friend and I love you like a sister, but right now in this moment, I hate you."

Cristina smiled satisfactorily to herself, leaned back in her chair and shoved a big piece of cake into her mouth.

"When did you married?" asked Izzie, looking to Cristina waiting for her to answer.

Cristina gave a casual shrug of her shoulders and popped another piece of cake into her mouth.

"It has to be after I met him in the bar. It's still a little fuzzy but when I woke up in his hotel room…naked," she paused to swallow the big lump that formed in her throat "I had a wedding ring on my finger and so…so, um….did he."

"You got drunk in a bar, woke up naked in a strange bed, and married a complete stranger?!!" Izzie yelled.

"Not a stranger. McDreamy," said Cristina with a smug smile on her face.

Meredith and Izzie both turned to give her a deadly glare. Cristina was doing more damage than good, so it was time for her to bite the bullet and tell the whole sordid details.

"When you saw us by the on-call room this afternoon, we just had, um…we had…we sort of had," she was having difficultly saying the last few words.

"Spit it out!" yelled Cristina.

"We had sex!"

"You had sex in the on-call room?!!" yelled Cristina and Izzie in unison.

"It wasn't planned or anything. It just sort of…happened," she explained. "He pulled me in there to talk about the eye sex and we ended up having…real sex."

Izzie and Cristina looked at each other, trying hard not to laugh.

"Which on-call room was it?" asked Cristina.

"What does it matter?"

"It matters because when I'm working an overnight shift and need sleep, I don't want lay in the same bed thinking about you two having dirty sex." Cristina had the biggest grin on her face. She knew Meredith was having a hard time with this, but it was simply too funny to pass up.

"We didn't use the bed so you can rest easy!" she yelled. She was happy that Cristina and Izzie found humor in her mess of a life.

"You did the nasty nasty against the…? Nice. Just when I thought you were boring, you rise."

"What does this mean, Mer?" Izzie asked, feeling sorry for Meredith.

"I don't know what it means. He gave me an ultimatum," she said, recalling the events from the elevator.

"Why would he give you an ultimatum? You two seem pretty, er…compatible," Izzie was trying to be comforting, but it came out sounding sarcastic.

"We're compatible where sex is concerned, but what about the other stuff?" she asked.

"You mean the eye sex?" asked Cristina sarcastically.

"Cristina! You're not helping here!" Izzie yelled.

"He wants to give this marriage thing a try and let everyone know we're married. But I don't want to. I don't want people to think I'm getting preferential treatment because we're married."

"That's it? Who cares what everyone thinks! I agree with Cristina. Derek is hot. He's McFreakingManCandy and he wants to be with you. He obviously doesn't care what other people think and neither should you."

"Did you just call Mer's husband 'man candy'? Cristina asked.

"I think we can all agree that he's hot. If I were married to him, I'd be screaming it from the rooftops. Too bad he's not my type. Dr. Karev…now he's more my cup of tea."

"Alex Karev? He's an ass!" said Cristina, with a disgusted look her face.

"He may be an ass, but he's _my_ ass!" Izzie retorted.

There was a moment of complete silence, then the three of them burst out laughing at what Izzie said.

"In all seriousness, Derek gave me forty eight hours to decide what I want to do," Meredith said after they calmed down.

"Want to know what I think?" asked Cristina.

"Do we have a choice?" replied Meredith, giving her friend a sour look.

"Haha…very funny. I think you already made up your mind," she said, giving Meredith the look as if to say she knew exactly what she was thinking.

Meredith felt a rush of emotion surface and her eyes began to well with tears. She knew Cristina was right. She was always right and that fact irritated her to no end. She wished it was easy to ignore what people said about her. If anything, she should be used to it by now. In college and even to this day, she got a lot of slack from people because of her famous mother. It's because of it that she's so driven to prove that she can stand on her own two feet and not ride on her mother's coattails. People seem so inclined to think she uses her mother's status as one of the world's top surgeon to further her own career. They would be shocked to know that it's quite the contrary. The further she can disassociate herself from her mother, the better off she'd be.

With Derek, she felt the need to protect him from the backlash she suffered. She didn't want people to talk behind his back and speculate about the special treatment he gives her, if any at all. He just started his new job as head of neuro and she didn't want that accomplishment to be overshadowed by the fact that they were married. It may be trivial, but gossip is cruel and can be damaging to one's career. She loves Derek too much to have that happen to him. And now, if she doesn't make a choice, she'll lose him.

"He gave me forty-eight hours, Cristina. He said I had forty-eight hours then walked out on me. I didn't get a chance to tell him." She knew she sounded pathetic , but that was how she felt.

"Go find him and tell him now."

"I can't."

"Why can't you?" asked Izzie, moving to stand next to Cristina. "Go to his place and tell him."

"You don't understand. I _can't_ go to his place and tell him because I don't…I don't know where he lives."

_I don't know anything about him, except for the amazing hot sex. Okay, stay focused Mer._

"Okay, I'm not even going to ask how you can sleep with a guy, who you so happen to be married to by the way, and _not _know where he lives!" Izzie was looking at her with disbelief in her eyes.

"We didn't exactly meet in the most conventional way. We did everything backwards. Marriage, sex, and then the 'let's get to know each other first and see if we're a good match' kind of thing."

"We can break into the Chief's office and get the address," said Cristina, a devious smile began to spread across her face.

"Are you crazy?! I'm not going to break into the Chief's office. I'm not _that_ desperate to talk to him tonight."

"What a brilliant, beyond brilliant idea!"

"Oh no Izzie, not you too." She looked at both their faces and knew it was too late. They were already plotting and planning the break-in.

"C'mon Mer, we need some excitement," pleaded Izzie.

"If you want excitement, go to Joe's. There should be enough drunken nurses and doctors there by now. The stories you get out of them should give you the excitement you need."

"Why hear about you and Dr. McDreamy from them when we can get it firsthand." Meredith was so tempted to wipe the smirk off Cristina's face.

"Seriously, Mer. I need this. I haven't had sex in a _really_ long time and baking isn't working as well as it used to."

"That is not my problem! Besides, how are we supposed to get into his office? It's like freaking Fort Knox and damn near impossible to get in."

"Not if you have the key."

"You have the key?!" Izzie and Meredith asked in unison.

"How did you get the key to his office?" Meredith asked, unsure if she was telling the truth or not.

"Don't ask, don't tell. All you need to know is that I have a copy and we can breeze in and get the address, then breeze back out before his scary secretary notices a piece of paper out of place.

* * *

**Love. Hate. Review.**


	17. Chapter 17

"I can't believe I let you two talk me into this."

They were all piled inside Meredith's beat up old car, heading to the hospital.

"Relax. It's not like we haven't done this before," said Cristina, turning to the passenger seat to see Meredith sulking. Knowing Meredith was going to back out she volunteered to drive which was probably a good thing.

"That was a long time ago and we weren't breaking into our boss' office. We broke into a dorm room to steal a pair of underwear!" Shifting in her seat so she could address Cristina and Izzie who was sitting in the back seat, she continued "This is the _Chief's_ office. You remember him? He's the one who can make or break our career."

"Same difference."

"It is _not_ the same. It is very, very different. We were young, stupid and drunk. Now we're just old and stupid!"

"Well, I for one am grateful to you guys for getting my Hello Kitty underwear back. The kitty and I were very happy," said Izzie. She remembered how funny they looked when they emerged from the room, looking victorious and waving the underwear around.

"See? The break-in was not in vain. We made Barbie and the kitty happy," Cristina reasoned as she gave Meredith a sideways glance. "Now you and McDreamy can be happy once we get inside."

Giving Izzie a once-over, Meredith asked "Why are you wearing all black?"

"Cat burglars always wear black," replied Izzie, raising and lowering her eyebrows suggestively.

"We aren't stealing anything. We're just borrowing Derek's file so we can find his address," said Meredith, pausing to let the full impact of what she was doing absorb into her mind. "Does anyone else think this is borderline stalker-ish?"

"It's not stalking so much as it is 'boundary challenged'," said Cristina, turning to give Meredith a sneaky grin.

"Same difference!" yelled Meredith, annoyed at how Cristina likes to twist things around.

It was late by the time they arrived at the hospital and the parking lot wasn't nearly as crowded as it usually is in the morning. They looked around to make sure the Chief's car was not parked in his designated spot and got out of the car when they saw that it was empty.

"The coast is clear. C'mon, let's go."

They tried to casually walk across the parking lot, but anyone observing them would suspect something was up. Izzie kept giggling, while Meredith had the biggest scowl on her face. They entered the hospital lobby and made way to the second floor where the Chief's office resided. Izzie's giggling resonated in the massive lobby and was made worse by the fact that it was virtually quiet in there. You could probably hear a pin drop. They managed to make it to his office without being caught.

"Some day, you will have to tell me how you got your hands on the Chief's keys," Meredith said, eyeing the key that Cristina pulled out of her back pocket.

Meredith and Izzie stood guard while Cristina was busy unlocking the door. Despite the big glass window that overlooked the lobby, the office was almost pitched black. They've only been to his office a few times, so they would have to rely on memory to guide them to the personnel file cabinet. They heard voices coming from down the hall and in their haste they shuffled inside and closed the door with a loud thud.

_Shit! Shit! Shit!! We're busted!_

Together they stayed huddled on the on the floor and waited, their hearts beating wildly in their chests. They heard the footsteps getting louder as it approached the office. Holding their breaths, they prepared themselves for the worse. It was a few minutes before they heard the footsteps again, this time moving away from the office.

"Phew! That was close," said Cristina, a hint of amusement could be detected in her voice.

"Who's hand is that on my ass?"

"Sorry Mer," Izzie apologized as she moved her hand away.

"The cabinet is this way," directed Cristina as she crawled further into the room with Meredith and Izzie following suit.

"What's that sound?" asked Meredith nervously. She stopped in mid-crawl causing Izzie to collide into her.

"Ouch!" yelped Izzie "_That_ would be my stomach growling from the lack of food."

"Oops. Sorry Iz."

"Stop messing around and get over here!" yelled Cristina from a short distance away.

"Where is here? It's too freaking dark to see!" hissed Meredith.

"Follow my voice," said Cristina as she made soft noises to guide them.

They reached the cabinet and Cristina pulled at the handle, but it wouldn't give. She yanked at it again, but it wouldn't budge.

"Shit!" she hissed.

"What?" Meredith asked. She didn't like the sound of it.

"It's locked."

"It's what?!" she asked in disbelief. "Use the office key. Maybe we'll get lucky and it'll be the same."

"It's not working," said Cristina after she unsuccessfully tried to open it.

"Let me try," said Izzie as she pushed her way up to the cabinet.

She pulled out a bobby pin from her hair and inserted it into the key slot. She jiggled it a few times and within seconds they heard a soft click. Reaching for the handle, she pulled at it and the drawer opened to reveal the personnel files of all the doctors in the surgical department neatly filed in alphabet order.

"Cat burglar." Izzie winked at them and moved aside.

Meredith moved to the drawer, but stopped short of pulling out Derek's file. "I can't do it. It feels wrong."

"I think we passed 'wrong' when we broke into the Chief's office. Move aside, I'll do it." She pushed her way to sit next to Meredith and pulled out the file.

She leaned toward the window to get some light and said "Get a pen and paper."

They wrote down the address and Cristina carefully inserted the file back into its slot. Instead of closing the drawer, she tried to pull out another folder when Meredith grabbed her hand.

"What are you doing?"

"Don't you want to know what makes The Nazi tick? There's good stuff in here, Mer. We could use this information against her when she decides to make our lives miserable."

"No!"

"C'mon, Mer. Just a little peek," she said, trying to pull her arm out of Meredith's grip.

"No! We need to leave…now!"

"Alright, but when she barks at you, try to remember that you had this chance and you blew it.

She shoved the folder back into its place and closed the drawer. The three of them crawled back towards the door.

"Who's touching my ass again?"

"That's what you get for making me put the file back," retorted Cristina, pinching her bottom.

"Ouch! You bitch!" yelled Meredith.

"You know you love it."

When the coast was clear, they snuck back outside and locked the door. They were giggling and whispering to themselves when they rounded the corner and were stopped dead in their tracks.

"What the hell are you three doing here?"

Cristina leaned in and whispered under her breath so only Meredith could hear "I bet you wish I _had_ looked in that file."

Giving each of them a distasteful look, she repeated her question "I said what the hell are you three doing here?!"

Meredith, Cristina and Izzie stood rooted to the spot. They were surprised and a little shocked to see the Chief, Bailey and Derek standing before them.

"We were, um…we…well you see…. Mer?" Izzie was struggling to come up with an excuse. Her cheeks had turned a bright red color. She looked like a ripened tomato, the color made worse by the fact that she was wearing all black.

Meredith barely registered what was being said. She was too busy looking at Derek to care about anything else that was going on around her. She gave him a weak half-smile, not wanting the Chief or Bailey to suspect but the look he gave her was anything but warm. It was cold, distant and unyielding. She gave him another smile, her eyes trying to communicate what her heart was feeling but once again it was met with a blank stare. She began to wonder if he already made his decision to end it.

_He can't end it! He gave me forty-eight hours. I still have time!_

Cristina gave her arm a hard nudge, causing her to break eye contact with Derek.

"What?!" she hissed, turning to give Cristina a questioning glare.

"Dr. Bailey wants to know why we're here," said Cristina, turning her head toward Meredith to give her the "you better come up with something good" look.

"Oh! We were just, um…I forgot my bag so we came back to get it," she lied. She stole another glance in Derek's direction, only to see that his facial expression hadn't changed from before. She was really starting to worry and wished everyone would leave so she could talk to him.

"It takes all three of you to get a bag?" asked Bailey, disbelief in her voice. "Did you also forget where the locker room is?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" asked Meredith.

"The locker room is on the opposite wing of the hospital and on a different floor."

"Oh, well no wonder! That explains why we haven't found her bag yet. Thank you for setting us straight, Dr Bailey. Now if you would excuse us—" said Cristina hurriedly.

"You're lying! You know how I know? Because you're bad liars," yelled Bailey, her glare on them intensified. Meredith didn't think it was possible, but she could literally feel Bailey's eyes burning a hole into her skin.

"We—," The three of them tried to explain when they heard someone cough from behind Derek.

"Richard," said the voice. "I hate to interrupt, but do you think we can get going? I've had a rather long flight and I would like to see the patient and her charts before it gets too late."

"Of course," said the Chief. He gave the three of them a curious look and turned to address Derek and Bailey. "We should get going."

* * *

The three of them let out a collective sigh of relief when they left. Meredith stood watching Derek's retreating back, her eyes darting to the female stranger that was walking noticeably close to him.

"That was close!" said Izzie, fanning herself with her hands. "I thought you said the coast was clear."

"It thought it was!" said Cristina, defensively.

"Did you guys see the woman standing next to Derek?" asked Meredith, a quizzical expression on her face.

"How can you miss? She looked like she jumped out of the pages of Vogue magazine," said Izzie.

"So you _did_ notice her?"

"Yes Mer, _we_ noticed her. _We_ weren't busy ogling over Dr. McDreamy. And what kind of crap excuse was "I forgot my bag"?" asked Cristina.

"I'm sorry! You put me on the spot."

"We were all on the spot, Mer. I could've thought of something better."

"Then why didn't you?"

"Don't give me shit! We came here for you," Cristina yelled. "Now we're going to Joe's and you are going to buy me a drink."

"I can't. I don't have my bag, remember?"

"You really _are_ a bitch." Cristina was trying to be angry, but she couldn't help but smile when she heard Izzie giggling from the other side of Meredith.

The three of them laughed as they exited the hospital and headed across the street to Joe's. Meredith was laughing on the outside, but she was troubled on the inside. The image of the stranger's arm brushing up against Derek's arm flashed across her mind. She had a feeling in her gut that something wasn't right.


	18. Chapter 18

_::Chief's Staff Meeting::_

Two hours into the meeting, the Chief decided to have mercy on them and concluded the meeting. He must've taken note of the disinterested look on everyone's faces when he began talking resource allocation and department budgeting. They are surgeons who thrive on the thrill of blood, surgeries and sutures, not the mundane administrative tasks of checks and balances and overhead issues.

"This meeting ran a little longer than I had intended. I hope this doesn't inconvenience anyone too much. Thank you and good evening, everyone." His phone rang and he walked outside the hall to answer the call.

Derek let out a sigh of relief when the meeting finally ended. He was exhausted and in desperate need of alcohol to numb the pain in his heart. Thinking about Meredith was exhausting and at the moment, all he wanted to do was drown himself in scotch. He made it out into the hallway and was about to enter the elevator when he heard the Chief call his name. He hesitated for a second, thinking he could pretend not to hear him and make his escape into the safe confines of the elevator when the Chief yelled his name again. Letting out a resigned sigh, he turned to see the Chief and Bailey standing next to someone he recognized from his past.

"Did you need something?" He directed his question to the Chief, but was looking straight at the female standing next to him.

"I know it's late Derek, but I wanted to introduce you to Dr. Danielle Perkins. She's here to do a consult on the TTTS case we admitted yesterday. I'm hoping to persuade her to stay and head up the neonatal dept." He turned and gave her a flirtatious smile which earned him a glare from Bailey who was standing a short distance away.

"I'm flattered by your offer, Richard," she said, her eyes never leaving Derek's.

"So I take that as a yes?" The Chief asked with a note of excitement in his voice.

Shaking her head lightly, she laughed softly and said "Not yet, but I promise to give you an answer by the end of the week." She turned to Derek and said "It's nice to see you again, Derek."

"Same here," Derek replied "How have you been, Dani?"

"You two know each other?" asked the Chief, looking back and forth between the two of them.

"Derek and I go _way_ back," she explained. "I was his number one girl until he upped and married someone else." She arched her brow and gave him a mischievous smile.

Derek could see the fiery look in her eyes and knew exactly what she was thinking. They hadn't seen each other since the day of his wedding when she pulled him aside to tell him he was making the biggest mistake of his life. Derek knew Dani never liked Addison. She always thought she was snobby and pretentious and not good enough for "her Derek".

"We're divorced," he stated with no emotion in his voice.

"It's about time." She gave him her classic 'I told you so' grin and winked at him.

Derek was about to open his mouth to respond to her blunt statement when the Chief cleared his throat, rather loudly and said "I'm glad you two know each other, but we need to get going if you want to see the patient tonight."

Derek was glad to finally be free to make his escape. He was about to turn on his heels and leave when the Chief said "Derek, I was hoping you could join us. From what Miranda was telling me, the tests for one of the twins indicate a possible brain abnormality and I was hoping to get your input."

"Can this wait until tomorrow? I'll be in early and will make sure I stop by for a visit before rounds."

He hated having to make the excuse since he firmly believes in the "patient's needs first" policy, but he's had a crappy day and really wanted to be alone with his thoughts.

"I would really appreciate it if you came with us." Dani wasn't giving up and used the "pleading" voice she knew always worked on him. "It'll be quick and afterwards, you and I can go to that little quaint bar I saw across the street when I drove by. We can reminisce about old times."

"Okay," he said, reluctantly.

"Great!" she exclaimed, her smile broadening.

Derek was a little disturbed, yet not surprised by the victorious smile that flashed across her face. She was always a sneaky little brat and oddly enough, he found himself liking the fact that she was here.

Together, the four of them headed in the direction of the patient's room. It was getting late in the evening so they decided to visit her first before she went down for the night. As they turned into one of the corridors, they heard whispering and giggling. As soon as Miranda recognized who the voices belonged to, she shoved her way past Derek and the Chief and demanded "What the hell are you three doing here?"

Derek looked up from the floor and his eyes clashed into Meredith's. His heart skipped a beat at the sight of her. He could faintly hear Bailey grilling them, but he was too focused on Meredith to care and it appears that was all she could do as well. He saw her smile and he tried to smile back, but it seemed his body had lost all function of its muscles so all he could do was stand there and stare at her. He heard her give some reason about forgetting her purse and furrowed his brows together in confusion because he distinctly remembered her carrying it when they were in the elevator.

* * *

Derek was grateful that the visit to the patient's room was short. He was partially annoyed because they didn't really need him until tomorrow after a whole new set of tests were to be perforned. 

He and Dani were walking out to the parking lot when he spotted Meredith's car. He tried looking into her windows to see if they were in there, but it was difficult to see in the dimly lit area. He quickly scanned the parking lot to see if they were standing around when it occurred to him of their exact whereabouts – Joe's.

Turning to face Dani, effectively stopping her in her tracks, he said "Um, let's not go to the bar. I know of a good Italian restaurant just down the street."

"You know I don't like to fill my body with too much carbs. I want to go there," she said, pointing a perfectly manicured finger at the bar. "We can go to dinner tomorrow."

"Alright." He was too tired to argue with her and decided it was easier to give in. He knew it wasn't going to be easy pretending to actual casual with Meredith around, but he'd have to try. Maybe this will be good practice at doing the "casual" thing for when she decides to end their marriage.

* * *

Meredith was drunk. She had just finished downing her eighth shot of tequila and was waving her arms frantically in the air to get Joe's attention to ask for more. 

"Mer, I don't think you should drink anymore tonight." Izzie was drinking the same drink – a diet coke – that she ordered when they first arrived at Joe's.

"The night's _hiccup_ just beginning _hiccup_, Izzz..," Her words were slurred and she was developing a bad case of the hiccups.

"Barbie's right, Mer," agreed Cristina. "You look like shit and Joe's running out of tequila."

"It's too early to go _hiccup_ home. We're celebrating _hiccup_….or…mourning," she said, slamming her fist on the counter. The force of the impact caused the empty shot glasses that she had stacked into a pyramid to fall onto the counter. This earned a worried look from Joe as he came over to clear up the mess.

"What exactly are we celebrating or mourning?" asked Cristina.

"The end to my non-existent _hiccup_ marriage," she said with a bitter laugh at how pathetic her life has become.

At that moment, they heard the bells on the door ring and looked over to see Derek walking in with Dani hanging onto his arm. He looked uncomfortable and seemed to be scanning the room. He stopped as soon as he laid eyes on Meredith.

Giving him the best evil stare she could muster in her current drunken state, she turned her back to him and said in a loud voice "Well, if it isn't McShitHead and McModel!"

"Shh! They can hear you!" hissed Izzie.

"I'm not going to be quiet because they're here. This is my place too and I can do whatever I damn well please!"

Derek gave Izzie and Cristina a weak smile and led Dani to a small table in the corner. He helped her with her jacket and held out the chair for her to sit down. Unable to look away for long, Meredith turned her head slightly and saw the whole thing. She couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy and wished that it was her sitting there next to him instead of Miss ImTooSexyForMyBody.

"Ass!" she hissed under her breath.

"He's just being a gentleman, Mer."

"He's _not_ a gentleman! _hiccup_ He's an ass!" she barked at Izzie. "Fine…. He's a gentleman ass! Are you happy?"

* * *

"I like this place. It's not like those shark-infested bars you and Mark used to take me to." He winced at the mention of Mark's name and looked over to see that Dani was so busy surveying their surroundings that she didn't notice. 

"Aren't those girls the same ones the short scary woman was yelling at earlier?" She pointed her finger to the corner of the bar where Meredith, Cristina, and Izzie sat.

"Yes," he answered without looking over. He could feel Meredith's eyes boring into his very soul and didn't want to look at her.

* * *

Turning back around, she held her shot glass up and yelled "Fill me up, Joe!" _hiccup_

Joe gave her a sad look and came over. "I'm sorry honey, but I have to go see what those two need to drink." He made the excuse and gestured to where Derek was sitting with his companion. "I'll take care of you when I get back, okay?" he said. He had no intention of giving her anything but hot, strong tea when he returned.

When Joe was almost out of earshot, she turned to Cristina and whined "Why is he going over to the dark side?" She dropped her head onto Cristina's shoulder and whined more pathetically than before "First McDevilWearsPrada takes Derek away and now she's taken my Joe away too."

"No one's taken Derek away." Cristina tried her best to be comforting, but her remark came out sounding more sarcastic than comforting.

"She did," she sobbed, waving her hand in a defeated manner in the air.

"You're pathetic when you're all gooey and sappy with love and alcohol. Go over there, whip it out and mark your territory."

"I don't have any boy _hiccup_ penises to whip out. Do you have one I could borrow?" She looked expectantly at Cristina as though she was actually waiting for her to pull out a penis from her back pocket.

"Are you psycho?" Cristina gave her an incredulous look and pulled her head off her shoulder. Cupping her face between her hands and squeezing it together making Meredith look like a fish, she said "I was speaking figuratively!"

She sat straight up when she saw Joe walk back towards their table carrying two drinks. She recognized the double scotch-single malt drink and presumed the dirty martini was for her. She leaped off the barstool and ran towards Joe.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa…where's the fire?" He raised his arms higher, narrowly missing the collision.

"Where are you taking those?" she asked, knowing exactly where he was headed.

"These are for Dr. Shepherd and his lady friend." Meredith almost vomited in her mouth when she heard the last few words.

_Lady, my ass!_

"I'll take it to them," she volunteered.

"Why?" he asked, eyeing her suspiciously.

"Because I love you and I want to help, okay?"

"Good thing Walter didn't hear you say that. He has a raging temper like you," he joked. "Be careful not to spill the drinks, my little firecracker." He smiled and handed her the drinks.

Meredith took the drinks and walked with slow determination towards the happy couple.


	19. Chapter 19

Cristina and Izzie were sitting at the bar watching with peaked interest as Meredith took the drinks from Joe.

"Shouldn't we do something?" Izzie didn't like the look of this, but she couldn't tear her eyes away.

"Are you kidding me? This is too good to miss."

They turned their chairs and watched as Meredith made her way to the table.

* * *

Derek was trying to listen to Dani as she talked about her flight from London, but from the corner of his eyes he could see Meredith precariously carrying the drinks as she made her way over. Dani had her back and didn't see this, but Derek had a good view and he was enjoying every second of it. As she came closer, his amusement turned to panic when he saw that she was planning to empty the contents of the drink on Dani's head. He leaped out of his chair in time to grab her wrists and held them still. 

"Meredith!"

"Shut up," she hissed, giving him a deathly stare.

"Meredith, let me explain," he pleaded with her, his hands still holding onto her wrists.

"I said, shut up!" She tried to pull free of his hold which caused the drinks to spill onto the floor. "I became boundary challenged because of you. I had my ass grabbed not once, but twice and we could've been caught!"

Derek could not make any sense of what she was saying. "Boundary what?"

"Challenged!" she snapped at him.

"Meredith, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"So you're deaf _and_ stupid! Let go of my arms so I can bring your lady friend her drink."

"No."

"Move aside. I may be small, but I can still kick your ass!" Her threat was futile since all it accomplished was making him smile.

Derek was amused and found himself turned on by her jealousy. Pretending to be defeated, he lowered his head and moved aside, letting go of her wrists at the same time. She walked over and carefully placed the drinks onto the table. Dani looked curiously at Meredith, then to Derek and back to Meredith again.

Extending her hand, she said "Hi, I'm Meredith. And you are?"

"I don't think that's any of your business," replied Dani calmly.

"It is very much so my business! Don't you know that he's married?"

"Look, Meredith. I don't know who you think you are, but Derek is _not_ married. He told me so himself."

"You said that?" she asked, turning to look at Derek. "You ass!"

"I didn't mean—," he tried to explain but she shoved him aside and ran out the door. She pushed him so hard it caused him to stumble back a few steps. By the time he composed himself, Cristina and Izzie were already running out after her.

"Wait here," he instructed Dani before rushing out the door after her.

The cold evening chill hit him as soon as he ran outside the bar. It took a while for his eyes to adjust to the darkness as he frantically scanned the street for Meredith. He was about to give up when he saw them walking toward the hospital parking lot.

"Meredith, wait!" he yelled as he sprinted across the street.

Meredith hesitated when she thought she heard his voice, but she immediately shook it off thinking it was her alcohol-induced brain tricking her into thinking he came after her instead of staying with "the other woman".

"Meredith!" She heard it again, except this time his voice was louder almost as if he was standing nearby.

"Mer," Cristina tugged on her arm, forcing her to stop and turn around.

"What?!" She gave Cristina an angry stare, then looked past her shoulders and realized why she had stopped her. Derek was standing a few feet away, hunched over trying to catch his breath.

"Why are you following me?" she demanded. It was an idiotic question to ask, but she was angry and drunk and all rational thoughts flew out the window the minute he decided to bring the witch to _her_ bar.

Looking awkwardly at Cristina and Izzie, he moved closer to her and asked "Can we go somewhere private?"

"No. Whatever you have to say, you can say it in front of them."

"Okay," he agreed, although he wasn't too happy about it. "I know you're upset about Dani. I understand that—."

The familiar, intimate way in which he said her name made Meredith's blood boil. Suddenly, she didn't want to hear what he had to say. Taking a step closer to him, her voice laced with anger she yelled "Do you?! Somehow I doubt it. Because if you did, you would shut up, turn around and go back inside because you would realize that I am this close to getting in my car and running you over in the parking lot!"

She turned on her heels and tried to leave when she felt a firm hand on her upper arm.

"Don't touch me!" She slapped his hand and tried to pry his fingers off her arm but Derek refused to let her go. He swung her around with so much force she collided into his chest, the wind knocked right out of her. Taking advantage of the situation, he wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close, forcing her to look up at him.

"Let me go." she hissed. Her breathing was short and ragged and she wasn't sure if it was because of the collision or the excitement of him holding her so close. Her arms were pinned to her sides and she squirmed from side to side trying to free them from his tight embrace. She stopped moving when she saw a glint of excitement and desire in his eyes. This both infuriated and excited her.

_Ass! I'm struggling and he's getting excited!_

"I'm not letting you go until you let me explain." His face was so close to hers, she could feel his warm breath fanning across her flushed cheeks.

"You may be able to use your strength to make me stay, but you can't make me listen." She turned her head to the side, pretending to look at something on the floor.

"I'm not letting you go." He knew she was stubborn but so is he. He was prepared to stay there for as long as it took. "You can listen to me or we can stand here and freeze to death in the cold."

He pulled her close and leaned in to plant a soft kiss on her exposed neck. He continued to trail hot kisses up her neck, stopping only to whisper in her ear. "Please Meredith…,"

A soft moan escaped her lips but she refused to give in and look at him. She felt his mouth move from her ear to linger close to her lips. "I can do this all night long."

They heard a soft cough and turned to see Cristina and Izzie standing there. "We're going to, um…go inside and give you guys some privacy." Cristina turned and hissed something under her breath in which Izzie could be heard saying "No, we can't watch! C'mon!" Izzie gave them both a big smile and pulled Cristina's arm, literally dragging her away.

As soon as they were gone, Derek turned to her and asked "Where were we?" He gave her his McDreamy smile and lowered his eyes to stare at her lips.

Meredith's pulse quickened her heart beating wildly against her chest. She could feel the barrier she had carefully constructed give way as he continued to hold her close. As much as she wanted to stay in his arms, there were questions that needed to be answered first.

"If I promise not to run, will you let me go?"

Derek was beginning to enjoy holding her, but he nodded his head and reluctantly let her go.

"Who is she?" She crossed her arms over her chest and took a few steps back, putting some distance between them.

"Danielle Perkins. The Chief asked her to come for a consultation on the TTTS case."

"How do you know her?" She let out a deep sigh, not sure that she really wanted to hear the answer.

"We, um…we used to date when I lived in New York." He looked at her intently, trying to read her thoughts.

"But I thought you were married to Addison."

"I was," he said. "We dated for a few years before I met and married Addison."

"How serious was it?" she asked. She suspected that there was more to it than what he was telling her.

"It's not important."

"How serious?!" she yelled. She knew she was going to kick herself later for asking, but she needed to know.

"Meredith..."

"Damnit! Just tell me!"

"We were engaged." He saw her body stiffen and tried to move closer to her, but she took a step back and held her hand up to stop him.

Meredith felt like her world was crashing down around her and she was being crushed by the falling debris. She was struggling to breathe and began hyperventilating. "I…can't…breathe…"

Within seconds, Derek was by her side holding her in his arms. She leaned against him for support as she tried to control her breathing. He gently ran his hand up and down the length of her back, soothing her. For a few minutes, they stood like that until her breathing was normal again.

Everything he said came crashing back and all the anger she felt began to surface. She pulled herself away and began beating wildly on his chest. "I hate you, you ass! I wish I never met you!"

"Don't say that," he pleaded with her. Reaching out he grabbed both her wrists and pulled her back into his arms.

All the tears she had been holding back began to pour out and she started crying uncontrollably.

"Meredith…"

"Shut up!" she yelled. Before she knew what was happening, she reached up and pulled his face down and kissed him hard. She was trying to punish him, to punish herself for being weak. Derek wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her back with the same fervent need. Running her fingers through his hair, she grabbed a handful and tugged at it hard. The sudden pain caused him to open his eyes and it clashed into hers. Together they stood looking into each other's eyes, as each of them fought for control of the kiss. The kiss was meant to punish, but all it did was elicit more desire and desperate need of each other.

The kiss went from hard and unyielding to soft and coaxing. Meredith released the hold she had on his hair and massaged his scalp, loving the feel of its soft silky strands between her fingers. Letting out a desperate moan she moved her other hand to rest against his muscular chest, relishing the feel of its warmth. She could feel his heart beating wildly against the palm of her hand and smiled into their kiss. Moving her hand from his chest, she trailed her fingers lower until it came to linger just above his groin.

Breaking the kiss, Derek gazed deep into her eyes and saw a look of mischief. He felt her hand lightly graze his throbbing penis through his pants and said in a hoarse whisper "God, Meredith. If you don't stop, we're going to end up—." Derek could barely finish his thought when she reached lower and cupped him in her small hands.

His mouth came crashing down on hers again, his lips urging hers apart to allow his invading tongue entry. He pulled back slightly, letting his tongue dart in and out sensually as it trailed a wet path along her swollen lips. Meredith felt the heat pooling at her core and gave his penis a light squeeze. Derek opened his eyes and looked straight into hers as their kiss intensified.

"I still hate you," she said, nipping at his lower lip, her eyes never leaving his.

"I love the way you hate," he teased. He was still fighting for control of the kiss, but if he was completely honest with himself, he had lost all control when she reached for him.

"I hate your lady friend." She unconsciously squeezed him tighter, causing him to wince in pain.

"I know." He reached down and carefully extracted her hand from his manhood and laced his fingers with hers. "You have to know that bringing her here was not my idea."

"I know, but that doesn't make me hate you or her any less."

"She'll only be here for a short while. As soon as her case is done, she's gone."

"You promise?" she asked, sounding hopeful.

"I do." Derek knew he shouldn't have made that promise, especially since the Chief offered Dani the job. But at that moment, nothing was more important to him than having Meredith back in his arms.

"You, um…you should go back to your friend. She's probably wondering where you've gone to." Meredith heard herself talk, but she couldn't believe she was telling him to go…and to go back to his hot leggy ex-fiancé, no less.

Derek looked at his watch and realized that he had been with Meredith for nearly half an hour. Silently cursing to himself, he looked at her with an apologetic half-smile. "Meredith, I'm sorry. She's never been to Seattle and I'm the only one she knows here," he tried to explain, hoping she would understand that he really didn't want to leave her.

"It's okay. I understand," she lied. She's gotten to be really good at lying to herself.

"This thing between us is not over." He looked straight into her eyes, trying to see what she was thinking. "I know I gave you forty eight hours, but I'm not ready to let this end and I don't believe you are either."

"You really _are_ arrogant and cocky." Meredith couldn't help but feel a sense of relief at what he said. He was right. She didn't want it to end and now it seems, neither did he.

"I think you like me arrogant and cocky." He emphasized the last word, causing her to look away blushing. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" He brushed her hair away and lifted her face up so he could give her a reassuring smile.

"Okay."


	20. Chapter 20

He leaned in and gave her a long lingering kiss on the lips before walking back across the street. Meredith stood watching him, her fingers absently touching her lips. She was watching him so intently that she didn't see Cristina and Izzie approaching.

"Is everything okay?" Izzie was the first to speak, breaking the silence.

"He doesn't want it to end," she replied, her eyes still fixated on his retreating back.

"Doesn't want what to end?" asked Izzie, confused.

"Us," she said, smiling to herself. "He doesn't want _us_ to end."

"I can't say I blame him." Cristina moved to stand next to Meredith. "That kiss was…hot!"

"You saw us?" She turned around to look at Cristina, shocked and embarrassed at being seen.

"It's pretty hard not to miss, considering you were standing in the middle of the parking lot groping each other like two sex-starved teenagers!"

"I, um…I wanted to—." She was struggling to find an explanation.

"Give him something to remember you with?" Izzie offered.

"Sort of," she agreed, although she wasn't sure what it was meant to do. She seems to lose all self control around him and the anger only spurs the desire even more.

"So…you kiss him and get him all worked up and then send him back to McHottie? Good job."

"Cristina!" Izzie yelled when she saw the look of worry flash across Meredith's face.

"Don't worry." Cristina turned to glare at Izzie. "I saw the kiss…and then some. He's not over you and he's not bound to forget, even with her around."

"I hope so." She turned to look in the direction of Joe's bar, but he was no longer in sight.

Cristina also saw the worry and tried to make light of the situation. "C'mon Misdemeanor Meredith, let's go home. I'm starving."

Meredith looked over and saw that her friend was trying to make up for the slip-up. "If I'm misdemeanor Meredith, what does that make you two?"

"Your foxy felons." Cristina gave her a suggestive wink and wound her arm around Meredith to drag her to the car.

"We can't leave." Meredith pulled her arm out of Cristina's grasp.

"Mer, I was kidding about earlier. He's not going to do the nasty with her."

"I know and I trust him." Meredith was a little surprised to hear herself say that she trusts Derek. She was taking a monumental leap of faith by following her heart, which goes against every belief her mother had instilled in her. "I…I forgot to pay Joe for our drinks. Unless one of you did before you left?"

Cristina and Izzie gave her guilty looks, indicating they didn't. "We weren't really too concerned with that at the time. I'll go pay now." Cristina began to walk across the street when Meredith stopped her.

"I'll do it," she offered.

"You didn't want to buy me a drink earlier, but now you do?" She narrowed her eyes and gave Meredith a suspicious look. "This doesn't have anything to do with Derek, does it?"

"No."

"Liar."

"Okay, maybe a little," she confessed, feeling a little guilty for wanting to spy on him. "Drive the car and meet me over there."

* * *

Derek was glad his erection had gone down by the time he reached the bar. It was going to be difficult explaining to Dani why he bolted out the door after Meredith and left her alone. He didn't need to do it with an erection prominently pushing up against the zip of his pants. Standing at the entrance, he took a deep breath and looked inside to see Dani talking to a man. His back was facing Derek so he couldn't see who it was, but the irritated look on Dani's face told him all he needed to know. He opened the door and caught the end of what Dani was saying to the stranger.

"…boyfriend will be returning shortly. You'd better leave before he sees you and beats you to a pulp for talking to me."

As soon as she saw him standing at the doorway, she leaped out of the chair and flung her arms around his neck, almost choking him in the process.

"You're back! I've missed you so much!" she squealed, her arms still wrapped tightly around his neck.

"You're choking me," he managed to say, his voice strained from the lack of oxygen.

Turning her eyes, she glared at him and hissed under her breath "That _was_ the plan, but now I need you. Just go with me on this, okay?"

Derek gave her a curious look but before he had a chance to respond, she kissed him. Derek was taken aback by the kiss, but he saw the pleading look of desperation in her eyes and kissed her back.

The kiss lasted longer than either of them had intended. Her breathing ragged, Dani broke the kiss and leaned back to look at him. Derek tried to mask his expression, but even he had to admit that he was affected by the kiss.

"You're a terrible kisser," she teased, her arms still wrapped around his neck.

"So are you," he replied, trying to catch his breath. "What was that about?" He nodded his head to the stranger that had gone back to sulk at the bar, giving them dirty looks.

"The creep tried to hit on me," she pouted as she went on to explain. "Apparently he didn't get the message when I told him I wasn't interested in some big ugly oaf who smelled like he'd been doused in beer. He started getting aggressive and that's when you walked in."

"Ah…. Do you want me to go over there and beat the living daylight out of him?" he teased, knowing that Dani is fully capable of taking care of herself.

"Nah. I don't want you to hurt those pretty hands of yours and the hair…it would be a crime against nature if any damage was done to that hair." She reached up and ruffled his hair, causing a few locks to fall forward onto his forehead.

"A crime against nature, huh? You're going to pay for that!" He grabbed both her wrists and held them high above her head, forcing her to stand on tiptoe.

"Let me go, you big oaf!" she squealed, laughing at him.

They were so busy laughing that they didn't notice someone had walked in the door. They both turned their heads to see Meredith standing there, an injured look on her face. Derek's smile fell and he immediately released Dani's hands.

"Meredith. You don't—,"

"I understand perfectly," she hissed, trying to bite back the tears. She knew the pain would come later, but right now she needed to remain strong. "You want the answer to your ultimatum? Well, here it is…it's over. You and me…we're done."

She turned to leave but Derek grabbed her arm, pulling her back. "It's not what it looks like."

"It never is, is it? Let go of my arm." Her voice was low and angry as she looked down to where his hand was holding her and back up. "Don't follow me because this time, I really_ will_ run you over with my car."

Despite the fierce warning from Meredith, Derek tried to run after her to explain. He had no idea what he was going to say, but he couldn't let her go like that.

"It's no use running after her." Dani grabbed his arm to prevent him from leaving. She looked at him and couldn't help but feel sad at how lost he looked, standing there staring at the door.

"She hates me," he mumbled, the words barely audible.

"Yes," she agreed.

"You're not helping!" he yelled, his voice agitated. Seeing the shocked and injured look on her face, he softened his voice and apologized "I'm sorry."

"You're an ass. I get it." She tugged at his arm and tried to drag him away from the door but he resisted, thinking that if he stared at it long enough Meredith would come walking back in.

"She's not coming back," said Dani, letting out an exasperated sigh when he refused to budge. After a few more attempts at pulling him, she managed to get him to walk away. They went back to their table and ordered new drinks from Joe.

Derek sat slumped in his chair, sulking and refusing to look at her. Once Joe deposited their drinks and left, she leaned in across the table and said "Are you going to tell me what's going on between you two or do I have to beat it out of you?"

Derek's eyes shot up to look directly into hers. "What is it with women threatening to cause me bodily harm today? First Meredith and now you."

"She threatened to hurt you? I like her already."

"Yeah, well she doesn't like you and she sure as hell hates me," he let out a sad, defeated laugh.

"What's this about an ultimatum?" she asked, a quizzical expression on her face.

"You heard?"

"The whole bar heard."

"Earlier today, I gave her an ultimatum in which she had forty-eight hours to decide whether she wanted to be with me or not." He gave her the short version, intentionally leaving out the part about the on-call room sex and the aftermath. It was the reason for the ultimatum, but it was too painful to bring up.

"You gave her _two days_ to decide whether she wants to be with you or not?" she asked, raising her voice at how ridiculous it seemed. When he didn't respond, she continued "Are you stupid or what? Has being with that robot of an ex-wife for so long made you completely insensitive to a woman's needs?"

"Dani—," he tried to protest.

She held up her hand to stop him "Don't "Dani" me. I don't see you for a few years and _this_ is what I come back to?"

The derision in her voice angered him, causing him to slam his drink on the table. "Don't pull the high and mighty card with me," he snapped. He may have lost Meredith forever and he wasn't in the mood for Dani and her accusing tone. "You left _me_, remember?"


	21. Chapter 21

Undeterred by his sudden mood change or the bitterness in his voice, she said "Yeah, I left you. I left because you couldn't decide what you wanted." Leaning back in her seat, she looked him straight in the eyes and said "It seems nothing has changed."

"You're wrong. I knew what I wanted. I wanted a wife, a warm home to come back to each night. I wanted stability, constancy in our lives. I was not prepared to travel the world, moving from city to city." Forcefully running his fingers through his hair, he took a deep breath and continued "We were at different crossroads in our lives and deep down neither of us were prepared to make the sacrifice. But despite all that, I wanted us to work out…but then you upped and left town without so much as a "good-bye"."

Filled with guilt, she reached across the table and placed her hand over his. "I shouldn't have left you like that. It was cowardly and wrong. I tried to make amends, but when I came back I discovered that you found solace in the arms of that witch."

"Addison was a mistake," he said, feeling disheartened.

"I'm glad you admitted it. Too bad it took the slutty bitch to jump into bed with another man to make you realize that." Dani never liked Addison. That fact was obvious when Mark first introduced them at a party. She and Derek were still together at the time and the looks Addison gave him would always send Dani into a fitting rage.

"She didn't cheat on me with just any man, Dani. She cheated on me with Mark."

"That fucking manwhore!" she exclaimed, causing a few of the people sitting nearby to look at her in surprise.

"Can you lower your voice, please? I don't want the whole bar to know every single detail of my life." He could feel all eyes on him and fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat.

"Er…too late for that one. You and the little firecracker have been more than entertaining tonight." She gave a light-hearted laugh and looked over to see him smiling too. "You love her, don't you?"

"Yes," he said without hesitation. "When I'm with Meredith, she makes me feel alive. I look forward to waking up in the morning and going into work knowing I get to see her. I love everything about her – her smile, the way she chews on her lower lip when she's deep in thought, her tendency to fidget with her watch when she's nervous, her laugh…it's not one of those girlish giggles but a heartfelt laugh that makes your heart soar whenever you hear it, and her eyes...they just draw you in and hold you captive, also the way her hair smells…I think she said it was lavender, and her tiny little ineffectual fists that fit so perfectly into mine. So yes...I love her." He knew he sounded like a lovesick puppy rambling on about her, but those are the qualities that he finds so endearing about her.

"And now she hates you," she said, stating the obvious.

"She hates me because she saw us kiss. It was the stupidest thing I've ever done."

"Yeah. That ranks up there with marrying Satan."

"Don't go there. Not tonight." He gave her a warning look and finished the rest of this drink. "Why the hell did you kiss me anyway?"

"Hey! Need I remind you that it was a two-way street?"

"Did you…did you feel something?" he asked, his brows furrowed together as though he's trying to figure out what that feeling was. "I mean, were you affected by it?"

"Affected how?" she asked, not sure where he was getting at.

"No offense or anything—." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"Uh-oh…. It's never a compliment when people start their sentences off with "no offense", but go on."

"Well, it felt like kissing a cold fish."

"You really _are_ an insensitive oaf, do you know that?" she yelled, trying to hit the back of his head.

"I'm being serious. I mean…we were once engaged. I don't remember our kisses ever leaving me feeling…cold. Doesn't that strike you as being a little weird?" he asked, looking perplexed.

"I mean this in the most loving way, but for a brain surgeon you really are brainless. Haven't you considered the possibility that the reason you felt nothing is because you're in love with someone else?"

"I guess you're right."

"What do you mean "you guess"…of course I'm right!"

"I've screwed up and now she doesn't want to stay married to me."

"Whoa!" she exclaimed, nearly falling off her chair. "You two are _married_? Wh-when did that happen?"

"It's complicated."

"Stop pussyfooting around or I swear I will throttle that arrogant throat of yours!" She gave him a deadly stare and asked "Is this why she asked me if I knew you were married?"

"Yes."

"I thought she was talking about firecrotch."

"Dani!" He gave her a stern glare and looked around hoping no one heard. "You're incorrigible! And stop calling Addison names."

"Sorry," she apologized, but she still gave him a defiant look. "I didn't have anything else to read on the plane except those dirty rag magazines."

"Well, get your mind out of the gutter for a minute and help me with this."

"No way! You dug yourself a big hole and I'm not climbing in there with you. I think I'd much rather enjoy seeing her bury you in it."

"You're spiteful."

"This," she said, waving her hand between the space that separated them "is _nothing_ compared to the firecracker's wrath when she sees you." She leaned back, smiling satisfactorily to herself. She loves Derek and hate to see him hurting like this, but a small part of her is going to relish seeing him squirm at the mercy of a woman for once. "Now tell me everything…from the start."

* * *

Meredith burst out of the bar running as fast and as far away as her legs would carry her. Her vision was blurred by the tears that came streaming down her face. She vigorously wiped them away, but the more she wiped the faster the tears fell. In her haste to get away, she recklessly rounded the corner and ran straight into the street. Turning her head, she saw a pair of headlights coming her way but she froze, unable to move. She stood there watching the lights as they came closer, but her legs refused to move her from the spot. She closed her eyes, preparing herself for the impact and flinched when she heard the deafening sound of tires screeching on the pavement.

"Are you trying to kill yourself?!" Cristina yelled as she flung herself out of the passenger seat and grabbed Meredith, pulling her to the sidewalk. Izzie parked the car and ran over to see if she was okay.

"Kill myself?" she asked, looking at Cristina dazed and confused.

"Yes, you idiot! Didn't you see—." She stopped yelling when she saw Meredith's tear-stained face. "What happened? I thought you and Shepherd were okay."

Meredith slowly turned to look at her friend, her face expressionless. "I…he…they…," she panted, struggling to articulate her thoughts and explain what she'd seen.

"Are you okay, Mer?" Izzie reached over and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Can't…breathe…," she said, barely able to get the words out. Her throat felt dry and tight, her head befuddled from the alcohol still flowing through her bloodstream.

"You need to sit down. Let's go inside." Izzie gently tugged on her arm, pulling her in the direction of Joe's bar.

"NO!" she yelled, yanking her arm away."I don't want to go in there. I can't." Wrapping her arms around herself, she fell back against the wall for support.

Cristina looked in the direction of the bar, then back to her friend seeing that she was visibly shaken and said "Okay, we won't go inside." She came up to Meredith, wrapped her arm around her shoulders and said "Let's take you home."

* * *

Meredith lay curled up inside her bed, her eyes red from the tears she shed earlier. She was physically and emotionally exhausted and wanted nothing more than to disappear. As she lay in her room, letting the darkness drown her in her sorrow she heard the door open to reveal the silhouette of Cristina standing in the doorway. Without saying a word, she climbed into bed and wrapped her arms around her. The tears Meredith didn't think she had left came rushing out in an emotional hailstorm and shook her body as she gave in and cried herself to sleep.

* * *

Cristina was leaning against the nurse's desk reviewing a patient's chart when Derek came up to stand beside her.

"Good afternoon, Dr. Yang." She turned to give him a dirty look, then returned to the charts without saying a word.

"I was wondering if you knew where Mer…I mean, where Dr. Grey is today." He knew he was making a mistake even talking to her, given the cold deathly stare she'd given him but he needed to find Meredith. He'd spent a good part of the morning trying to look for her, but she was nowhere to be found.

Slamming the file shut, she gathered her stuff and stormed off in the direction of the elevators. Derek hesitated for a second, but ran after her and stealthily slid inside as the doors were closing. Seeing the look on her face, he wasn't so sure if it was such a wise move as he looked around and realized they were alone in the small confines of the elevator.

"I know Meredith hates—." He stopped speaking when he saw her move to pull the Stop button on the panel. The elevator jolted to a sudden stop and she turned to glare at him.

"Right here, right now…you are not my boss, you get that?" she hissed, her eyes shooting daggers at him. "You have no right to ask where or how Meredith is doing. You lost that right when you decided to play tongue hockey with that slut of a friend of yours."

"Dr. Yang—," he tried to explain.

"Shut up!" she yelled, consumed by her rage. "I watched my friend cry herself to sleep because of you. She deserves nothing but happiness and that is something you can never give her, so use what little brain cells you have and walk away. If you come near her again, I will kill you and _that_ is a promise."

She pushed the button and waited impatiently for the elevator to start back up again. She didn't like being in close proximity with him. The urge to cause him physical pain was overwhelming and the longer they were alone together, the harder it was to control the urge. She clenched her fists tighter feeling her nails biting into her hands hoping the urge would subside. It didn't.

Standing a few feet behind her, Derek was struggling to grasp everything that Cristina had said. His heart fell when he heard that Meredith cried herself to sleep. She was hurting and he was the cause of that pain. The realization hit him like a ton of bricks and suddenly the need to find her became so intense it was suffocating. He knew it wasn't going to be easy to convince her to forgive him. Hell, he didn't know if she was ever going to talk to him, let alone forgive him but he needed to try. He was ready for whatever obstacles stood in his way and right now that obstacle was in the form of a very feisty friend who was not only figuratively but _literally_ standing in his way.

"I know I don't deserve her, but I love her and I can't let her go without a fight. She's become an integral part of my life…my better half even. I need her…_we_ need each other and you can threaten to cause me physical harm or even death but I will continue to fight for her as long as there's a drop of breath left in my body."

"Those are just words," she said, still facing forward. "You want to gain her trust again? Prove to her that you love her. Use your head for once and I'm not talking about your overeager penis." The doors opened and she walked out, leaving him to stare at her in shocked silence.


	22. Chapter 22

Meredith lay in her bed staring aimlessly at the ceiling when she heard the front door open followed closely by the sound of footsteps running up the stairs. After a few minutes, the door to her bedroom burst open and Cristina came walking in.

"Have you been lying in bed all day?" she asked, grimacing at the sight of Meredith's disheveled hair and red puffy eyes.

"Hm-mmm" she replied, her eyes never leaving the ceiling.

"C'mon. You're getting up." She moved to the edge of the bed and reached for the comforter.

"No!" Meredith shrieked, gripping onto the blanket. "I don't want to get up. I like laying here doing nothing. Nothing suits me."

Yanking onto the blanket, she yelled "Get up! I'm _not_ going to let you lose your job over this."

"I'm sick," Meredith whined. "Did you tell Bailey that I'm sick?"

"Yes. I had a hell of a time convincing her since she saw us at the hospital yesterday night. Now get your ass out of bed before I jump in there and drag you out."

"Don't want to!" retorted Meredith, sounding like a petulant child.

"Fine. If you insist on behaving like a child, I will treat you like one." She lunged across the bed and grabbed Meredith by her ankles. With a powerful tug, she pulled her off the bed causing Meredith land on the floor with a loud thump.

"Ouch!" she yelled, rubbing her bottom. "I'm going to have a bruise because of you!"

"Good. Now we both have pains in our asses." Cristina glared at Meredith and reached for her again.

"I'll get up! I'll get up!" she yelled, slapping Cristina's hand away.

"You need a shower. You smell and your hair looks like Phyllis Diller on a bad day."

"No need to get nasty," she said, trying unsuccessfully to tame the tangled mass of hair. She stuck her tongue at Cristina and got up off the floor. Before reaching the bathroom, she turned and asked "Did…did anyone else ask for me?"

"No," she lied. Cristina saw the look of disappointment flash across her friend's face but she didn't want to get her hopes up. "Now go shower."

* * *

Except for the big bruise that formed on her left butt cheek, Meredith had to admit that she felt better after the shower. Pulling her damp hair into a loose ponytail, she threw on her favorite Dartmouth t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants and walked downstairs. She walked in and saw Cristina sitting at the breakfast table with a laptop open in front of her.

"What are you doing?"

"Finding you a divorce lawyer," she said, not taking her eyes off the monitor.

"D-divorce lawyer?" she stuttered.

"Yes. We need an exterminator to help get rid of our pest problem."

"Derek is not a pest."

"You're right. He's more like a rodent," she smirked, then turned her attention back to the computer.

* * *

Meredith stood in the middle of the busy streets of downtown Seattle, looking up at the building that housed the law office Cristina had insisted she go to. They spent a good part of the evening arguing, but she finally conceded and agreed to go, especially since Cristina offered to cover her shift which meant she could avoid seeing Derek for another day.

She stood there for at least twenty minutes, mentally preparing herself to do what she knew she had to do. Pining over him was not healthy for her and she needed to sever all ties to him. It was going to take a lot of effort with the first step requiring her to file for divorce. The work situation was going to be more difficult, unless she transfers to another hospital but that meant having to leave all her friends behind.

She was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn't hear someone yell a warning before they collided straight into her. She was quick on her feet and managed to recover her balance, but she dropped her bag causing all the contents to spill out onto the pavement. The teenager mumbled an apology before rushing off, leaving her to stare after him in disbelief. Silently cursing to herself, she bent down and began gathering up her belongings.

"Are you okay, miss?"

Looking up from the ground, she saw a handsome man squat down in front of her with a concerned look on his face.

"Y-yes…I'm okay," she replied, slightly embarrassed.

The stranger's face broke into a warm smile as he reached out to help her with her stuff.

* * *

Meredith didn't know how she got there but she found herself standing in front of the door to the law office. After the stranger helped her with her belongings, made his excuse and left, she stood there for another fifteen minutes before mustering up the courage and walked inside. The elevator ride was long and she found herself oddly entertained by the tacky music that played overhead. It provided the distraction she needed but that distraction soon disappeared when the elevator doors opened and she stood staring down a long empty hallway.

On shaky legs, she walked down the hallway until she reached a set of double doors at the very end. She looked down at the piece of paper in her hand and back up to read the sign that hung on the door. "Matthews & Smith, LLP". Yep…this was the place. She hesitantly reached out for the handle when the door jerked open to reveal a very pregnant woman standing there. The woman let out a yelp, startled to find someone standing there while Meredith stood looking at her bulging belly.

"Are you coming in or passing by?" the woman asked, a little breathless from the shock.

"Coming in, I think," she replied, resulting in her getting an odd look from the woman. "Are…are you okay?" She asked looking at her stomach with concern.

"You gave me quite the scare, but I should be thankful for that." She rubbed her belly, smiled and said "This baby is late so maybe a good scare will help push her out."

"Oh, okay," she said, still blocking the doorway.

"I don't mean to be rude, but do you think you can step aside? This baby is pushing up against my bladder and I need to…" she trailed off, leaving the rest unsaid.

"Of course! I'm sorry." Meredith stepped aside and smiled to herself as she watched the woman waddle uncomfortably down the hall.

Walking inside the office, she looked around and realized that she was alone. The office was spacious, immaculate, and the contemporary décor was very fitting of a law firm. She moved to sit on one of the leather chairs and could tell by its soft feel that it was very expensive. She shifted uncomfortably in her chair uncertain as to how she was going to pay for this on her measly salary at work.

The office was quiet…a little too quiet for her liking. It gave her the opportunity to think and she didn't want to think. She needed to get this done as soon as possible without letting her emotions complicate things. She nervously fidgeted with her watch, feeling her pulse beating wildly against the soft skin of her pale wrist. Just then, the door opened and the pregnant woman came waddling back inside. She gave Meredith a smile and proceeded to move behind the reception desk.

Flipping open the day planner on her desk, she looked up at Meredith and said "You must be Meredith Grey."

"Yes," she replied, nervously playing with her watch again.

"Are _you_ okay?" she asked, noticing her shaky fingers as she played with her watch.

"I'm, uh…I'm a little nervous," she admitted, smiling at the woman.

"Don't be nervous." She gave Meredith a reassuring smile and said "My name is Claire. Do you need me to get you some water?"

"I'm okay," she lied. "I just want to get this over with."

"In that case, let me go tell Mr. Matthews you're here." She gave her another warm smile and walked into the double doors behind her desk. She emerged a few minutes later and said "You can go in now."

"Th-thank you."

"Take a deep breath. It'll be over sooner than you think…or at least that's what my doctors keep telling me." She gave her a friendly smile and turned to look at her computer.

The office was unoccupied when she walked in. She hesitated almost ready to turn around and leave when she heard water running from inside what she assumed was the washroom. She slowly moved to sit down on the plush leather chair in front of the deep mahogany desk.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting. My pen broke and—," he looked up from wiping his hands and stopped in mid-sentence.

"It's you!" Meredith said when she realized that Mr. Matthews was the same stranger that helped her earlier.

"It's me," he replied, smiling at her.

"Are you Mr. Matthews?" she asked, sounding rather stupid.

"The one and only…and please call me Ryan. I would shake your hand, but I have ink all over and I don't want to dirty your pretty hands." Still smiling he moved across the room to sit at his desk, his eyes trained on her the whole time.

"So what can I do for you today, Ms. Grey?" he asked, lacing his fingers together and placing them on the desk in front of him. His smile broadened and he was staring intently at her.

"Meredith. You can call me Meredith."

"Okay, Meredith," he said, letting her name roll off his tongue. "To what do I owe this pleasure of seeing you again? Are you following me?" He gave her a winning smile and sat back in his chair.

"I, uh…I'm here for a, uh…a…divorce," she said, smiling awkwardly and nodding her head like a bobble-head.

"A divorce?" he repeated, stealing a glance at her ring finger. "I didn't notice a wedding ring earlier. I mean, not that I was looking or anything." His face turned a deep crimson red and he looked away momentarily to grab a pad of paper, lookng for a much-needed diversion.

Seeing him blush made Meredith smile. She found his boyish charm refreshing and the fact that he was handsome helped a little. She was starting to relax which is a little strange, considering the reason that brought her here. It was not the best of circumstance and one that she never envisioned herself ever being faced with.

"I don't have a ring," she lied, thinking about the small gold band that was safely tucked away in a small jewelry box in her nightstand.

"You don't," he said, giving her a curious half-smile. "And now you're here looking for a divorce."

"I guess so."

"You guess so? You don't seem very certain about this."

"When are people _ever_ certain about getting a divorce? Divorces are messy and the clean-up is always a bitch."

"Touche." He smiled, which was something he hasn't stopped doing since he saw her standing on the street from the coffee shop across the way. Pulling out the pen and pad of paper, he stretched his arms and said "Okay. Let's get started."

* * *

Nearly two hours had passed before Ryan put down the pen and paper and stood up from the chair. "I think I have all I need to get the paperwork drawn up."

"H-how soon can I have them?"

"It typically takes about a week or so." He walked around his desk and moved to stand next to the chair she was seated on.

"That long?" she asked weakly. Straining her neck, she looked up at him with pleading eyes and asked "Can't I have it sooner?"

"A week is the earliest that I can get it to you." He bent down and sat on the edge of the table with his legs outstretched beside her and crossed them at the ankles. Crossing his arms over his chest, he gave her a reassuring smile and said "I'll try my best to make it happen sooner, okay?"

"Okay," she smiled and looked away so he didn't see the tears that formed in her eyes.

It was too late. Ryan saw it and reached inside the pocket of his suit jacket to pull out a handkerchief and handed it to her.

"Thank you," she said with an appreciative smile and reached for the handkerchief. "You're probably used to having people cry around you."

"I have that affect on people," he joked.

"Oh! I,uh…I didn't mean, um…I didn't mean that _you_ make people cry. It's just that when they see you, they…cry?" she finished, wincing at her stupidity. "Crap!"

"It's okay. People do tend to cry around me…mostly men." He gave her a playful wink. "That's why I keep an ample supply of handkerchiefs in my top drawer."

"Thank you."

"For what?" he asked.

"For not making this more uncomfortable than it already is." She stood up and handed the handkerchief back to him. "I really should get going."

He stood up with her and said "Keep it. I have an ample supply, remember?"

"Okay. I guess I'll be hearing from you in a week." She reached for her bag and turned to leave.

"Meredith?" He called her name before she reached the door.

"Yes?" With her hand on the door handle, she turned to look at him.

"I hope you don't think I'm being too forward, but would you like to get some coffee or something? There's a small coffee shop across the street and they have the best scones in the city."


	23. Chapter 23

Meredith was running late. She forgot to set her clock and now she's running late, which isn't smart on her first day back from being out for two days.

She sprinted across the parking lot and up the stairs as fast as her legs could carry and slid into the locker room, unnoticed. She hastily got dressed and peeked out into the hallway to make sure the coast was clear, silently praying that Bailey wasn't on the warpath. She let out a sigh of relief and casually strolled out into the hallway, her hands busy tying her hair into a loose ponytail.

"Grey!" Meredith winced when she heard Bailey bark her name from behind her.

_Shit! I swear that woman is Houdini reincarnated._

She plastered a fake smile on her face and turned around, trying not to take notice of the scowl on Bailey's face and said in a cheery voice "Good morning, Dr. Bailey! It's so nice to see you."

"Do I look like I _like_ having my ass kissed, Grey?" she snapped, unfazed by Meredith's remark.

"I wasn't—."

"Don't bother. You're late and now you're in SCUT." She gave Meredith a once-over and walked away smiling satisfactorily to herself.

"Yes, Dr. Bailey." Meredith gave her a defeated look and turned to walk in the opposite direction.

"One more thing, Dr. Grey," Bailey yelled after her. "You might want to fix your clothes."

Meredith looked down and realized that her top was on inside-out. Feeling like a complete idiot, she yanked the door to the locker room and went back in to adjust her top. Sitting down on the bench, she laid her head in her hands and closed her eyes. Today was not going to be an easy day. She barely survived Bailey's wrath, but that would be a walk in the park compared to when she runs into Derek. She knew she'd eventually have to see him, but she was going to do her damndest to avoid that moment for as long as humanly possible.

She heard the door to the locker room open and shut with a soft "whoosh", but she couldn't open her heavy-lidded eyes to look and see who it was. She just assumed it was another intern and hoped they would do their business and leave without speaking to her. Her wish was short-lived when she heard a familiar voice ask "Are you okay?"

Slowly opening her eyes, she looked down to see a pair of dark blue scrub pants and let out an agonized groan.

_Why me? Why now? Why HIM?_

"Meredith?" She felt his hand on her shoulder and jerked away so fast she lost her balance and fell off the bench.

"Shit!" she yelled, glaring up at him.

He reached down to try to help her up, but she slapped his hand away and barked "Don't touch me!"

"I'm just trying to help—"

"I don't need your help! I was doing fine until you walked in; so do me a favor and walk back out."

Undeterred by her snarky comment, Derek did not move from where he stood. He's been waiting to talk to her for two days and he wasn't going to give up so easily. "I know you're upset, but please let me explain."

"You're wrong! I'm not upset because being upset means that you actually care and _this_…" She pointed her finger back and forth between them "…is me _not_ caring. So don't waste your breath trying to explain. Now if you'll excuse me, Dr. Shepherd, I have work to do." She stormed past him, leaving a disheartened Derek to stare after her.

As soon as Meredith rounded the corner, she collapsed against the wall letting out the breath she didn't realize she was holding. Her head was spinning from the events of the morning and she'd only been there for all of thirty minutes. Today promises to be a very long day, indeed. Bending her head, she stood hunched over trying to catch her breath. Just then, a pair of light blue scrub pants appeared in her line of vision and she gave another inward groan.

"Bailey's not here so you don't have to pretend being sick."

"I already saw Bailey and I think I'm going to be sick," she mumbled, still hunched over with her arms wrapped securely around her waist. "I saw Derek."

"You saw Derek?" Cristina asked, uncertain that she heard right.

"Yes," she said, straightening up to look at Cristina. "He came into the locker room while I was there and wanted to explain."

"Ass! I'm going to have to put a little more pressure on him." Cristina mumbled under her breath.

"A little what?" asked Meredith with a puzzled look on her face.

"Nothing," she said, brushing it off. "I think McHeadInAss needs to pay a visit to Dr. Snyder. He's got his head so far up his ass, he needs professional help."

"Dr. Snyder is a proctologist."

"Exactly."

Meredith's shoulders began to shake and her face broke into a huge grin as it erupted in laughter from Cristina's comment.

* * *

By some miracle, Meredith managed to avoid seeing Derek for the next few hours. She busied herself by taking every case that came walking in through the door. Being assigned to SCUT is every intern's nightmare, but Meredith didn't mind it so much…at least for today.

She finished up her fifteenth suture and was in the midst of cleaning up when Derek walked up to her. She let out an exasperated sigh and opened her mouth to talk when he stopped her by holding his hand up.

"I know you hate me, but please let me speak." He hesitated for a few seconds waiting for her to protest, but when she didn't, he continued "I shouldn't have kissed Dani. It didn't mean anything…and I know that's what people say, but it really didn't. She and I…. It was over years ago. The thing is…," he smiled sadly into her eyes, struggling to speak "…the thing is…I'm in love with you." He saw her flinch and said "I'm a little late…I'm a little late to tell you that…and whatever you decide, I just want you to know."

"Derek—,"

"It's you!" said a voice from behind Meredith.

_Shit! Why now? Why HIM?_

"It's me," she said, averting her eyes from Derek's questioning look. "To what do I owe this pleasu— oh my god! What happened?" She turned around to see Ryan standing there with streaks of blood running down the side of his face.

"This?" he asked, absently reaching out to touch the cut on his forehead. "It's not as bad as it looks."

"Don't touch that!" she yelled, grabbing hold of his hand. "Let _me_ decide how bad it is." Placing her other hand on his forearm, she pushed him back to sit on the hospital bed. "Sit here and don't move until I get back," she instructed. She turned around and nearly collided into Derek. Mumbling a quick apology under her breath, she side-stepped him and began walking away towards the supply room.

Derek was fuming as he watched the exchange between Meredith and this stranger. They seemed too comfortable with each other and he did not like it one bit. When she nearly ran into him, she purposely avoided making eye contact with him. She was hiding something and he had a feeling it involved the stranger. He saw her go into the supply room and turned to head in that direction.

Meredith's heart was beating wildly against her chest as she frantically searched the shelves for the supplies she needed. Her head was spinning with everything that's going on, but the one thought on the forefront of her mind was Derek telling her he's in love with her. She catches him kissing his ex-fiancée and he has the nerve to tell her that he loves her? She spent the last two days moping around the house, trying desperately to get over him and even going so far as filing for divorce and he tells her he loves her? Seriously?

She heard the door open and shut and without turning around, she knew he had followed her. She closed her eyes, half hoping he would stay but the other stronger half was praying he would leave. Being alone with him in small confined places is never a good idea since it always result in them being in rather...compromising situations.

"Meredith," he said tentatively.

Squeezing her eyes shut tighter, she winced slightly at the sound of him saying her name. Just hearing his voice brought back so many memories – painful and joyful ones alike. Her heart was breaking, but she needed to be strong. She needed to feign indifference, despite the overwhelming news he'd given her a few minutes ago if she were to survive this.

"I'm busy, Dr. Shepherd," she said, her voiced laced with cold indifference. She mentally gave herself a congratulatory pat on the shoulder for succeeding in sounding indifferent to him. Feeling indifferent was a whole different matter and one that she was nowhere close to being. "I have a patient waiting for me. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to him."

She turned around then and looked straight into his eyes, mentally giving herself another pat on the shoulder for not going weak at the knees. Her resolved slightly gave way when he looked into her eyes and smiled. Averting her gaze, she took a deep breath to try to regain some composure and turned back to him.

"Say what you need to say so I can go. Ryan is waiting—"

"Ryan? Since when do we call patients we've just met by their first names?" he inquired, his voice strained from the underlying anger in his otherwise calm demeanor.

Releasing a heavy exasperated sigh, she said "Don't play dumb with me. You listened into my conversation with him so don't pretend like you think we don't know each other."

"I'm sorry."

"You're sorry!" she yelled. "You're sorry for what, Derek? Sorry for pretending to play dumb? Sorry for letting me believe you wanted us to be together? Sorry for holding another woman in your arms after only a few minutes of leaving mine? Sorry for being caught sticking your tongue down another woman's throat? Sorry for being a selfish bastard? Sorry for telling me you love me after pulling a stunt like this? Or sorry for making me lo— Dammit!"

The sound of her pager going off was her saving grace. Forcefully pulling it off the clip on her waist, she looked at it and gave an inward groan. Looking up at him, she took a deep breath and said "Bailey's paging me 911. I need to go."

Derek's mind was still reeling from everything she had just said. He knew he should walk away, but his heart wouldn't allow it. As odd as it may seem, her anger gave him the reassurance he needed. She wasn't over him. She was upset and according to her, being upset meant she cared.

She nervously bit on her lower lip, having an internal struggle trying to decide what to do. She needed to respond to Bailey's page but didn't want to leave Ryan bleeding in the ER waiting for her to return. As if sensing her struggle, Derek reached down and took the supplies out of her hand nerveless fingers.

"You go see what Bailey wants and I'll take care of, er…your friend." Derek couldn't say his name so he used a word that was more neutral, hoping that that was all they were to each other.

Relenting a little, she said "You don't need to. Your skills would be of better use in surgery."

"It would, but I don't have anything scheduled for another hour. Besides, he's got a head injury which falls under my area of expertise." He smiled, trying to make light of the situation, hoping she would give in and allow him to help. He wanted to show her he wasn't selfish. Plus, being alone with the stranger will give him the time he needs to find out what his intentions are with Meredith.

Releasing the tight grip she had on the bag, she gave a half-smile and said "Th-thank you."

"You don't need to thank me, Meredith. It's just a small laceration that requires some minor stitches." And it shall remain small if he keeps away from Meredith, Derek thought to himself. The "friend's" injuries may become more severe if it turns out he wants more from her than the casual friendship or whatever. Shaking off his last thought, Derek gave her another reassuring smile and walked out the door.


	24. Chapter 24

Derek's smile dropped as soon as he closed the door. Taking a deep breath, he stood there for a few seconds gathering his thoughts. He needed to have his game face on if he's going to get through this without causing Ryan any physical harm. The enamored look he gave Meredith almost sent him into a flying fit of rage. Meredith must have missed it or she didn't react to it on purpose because he was standing nearby. Either way, he was going to get to the bottom of this. With long determined strides, he made his way to the ER…to where Ryan sat waiting for Meredith's return.

Meredith was halfway down the second set of corridors when she came to an abrupt halt. "Shit!" she yelled the expletive, prompting a few doctors and nurses standing nearby to turn and look at her. She was so distracted that she let slip the one important fact that she had allowed Derek to be alone with Ryan. They were going to be alone and they may start talking and if they started talking, Derek would know about the divorce. She wasn't ready for him to find out. Not like this. Not from Ryan. How could she be so stupid?

_This isn't good. This is SO not good. I need to go back. I need to get there before it's too late._

She turned and began walking in the direction she came when her pager beeped once more. "Double shit!" she yelled again, getting agitated looks from patients as well as the hospital staff. She already felt the sting of Bailey's wrath this morning. Ignoring her pages would be like digging her own grave. Then again…being buried in a hole right now wouldn't be such a bad idea. It would certainly help her out with her little predicament.

As she was debating over what she was going to do, she heard Bailey bark her name from the end of the corridor and silently prayed the floor would open up and swallow her whole. She has got to be the unluckiest person alive. Putting on a fake smile, she turned and said "Dr. Bailey! Sorry I'm late. I was finishing up with a patient in the ER." She lied, her voice faltering slightly. She stood there in the deafening silence praying Bailey's hawk-like senses didn't pick up on it.

"Hm-mmm," she sneered, giving her a once-over. "We have a full house and everyone is busy, so I need you on the Katie Bryce case that just came in. I'm taking you off SCUT" Handing her the file, she gave her a disapproving look and said "Today must be your lucky day."

"My lucky day?" she asked, confused by that statement. "Wh-what…wait! You're taking me off SCUT? I, uh…no…I need to go back. You don't understand…I need to go back now." she nervously rambled.

"Look, Dr Grey! I don't need to understand what the hell you were just rambling about. What I do understand is that we have a patient in need of a doctor to run a tox screen. Unfortunately, you are the only one available so take this chart and get going!" Giving her yet another disapproving look, she walked off muttering under her breath.

* * *

Derek stood at the entrance to the ER, peering in through the glass pane on the door looking straight at Ryan. He could see a few nurses and female doctors flirting and smiling at him as he sat on the bed waiting. It was nauseating, but even he had to admit that the guy was slightly good looking. Putting his official doctor smile on, he opened the door and walked over to stand a few feet from him.

Looking up, Ryan saw Derek and remembered him from earlier. He looked past him to peer over his shoulders expecting to see Meredith standing there, but when she was nowhere to be seen, he turned back and asked "Where's Meredith?"

Derek had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep his anger in check. Hearing the familiar way in which Ryan said her name didn't bode well with him. "Meredith got a page and had to leave."

"Oh," said Ryan. The disappointment was very obvious in his face as well as his voice.

"She asked me to take care of your injury, so if you don't mind I'd like to take a look and clean you up." He gave a strained smile and hope it came off sincere.

"Of course," said Ryan, recovering from the disappointment gave a smile in return.

Taking off his lab coat and placing it on the bed, he put the gloves on and proceeded to clean the blood from his face. "So you and Meredith know each other well?" he asked, looking down to see his reaction to the question.

Smiling at the mention of her name, Ryan said "Not really. We only met yesterday but from what I've got to know of her over coffee, I find her to be…amazing," he sighed. "She has this quality about her that just draws you in and keeps you wanting…. Ouch!" he yelped.

"Sorry," Derek apologized, trying to mask the satisfied look on his face. "I was so caught up in what you were saying that my hand slipped."

"Er…that's okay," Ryan replied, giving Derek an uncertain look.

"You were saying?" said Derek, urging him to continue.

"Yes, well…I knew the minute I saw her that she was different. Not like all the other girls. I can't quite put my finger on it," he paused, looking up at the light as though he was deep in thought. "I know what it is!" he said excitedly "It's her eyes…and the smell of her hair. It smells like—"

"Lavender," Derek finished his thought for him.

"Exactly," replied Ryan, his eyes lighting up as he smiled in remembrance.

"If you don't mind me saying so, you seem rather infatuated with Meredith. I wonder if she feels the same." Derek vomited a little in his mouth, but he needed to continue with this façade if he's to find out the truth.

"I wouldn't quite say I was infatuated, but I'm definitely intrigued."

"You do realize that she's married?" Derek asked, hoping the bombshell would be enough to end whatever feelings he has for Meredith or at least end any thoughts he has of pursuing her.

"Yes. As a matter of fact, that's how we met. She came to see me in my office."

"Why would she want to see _you_?" Derek asked. He had a sinking feeling in his stomach and his head was pounding.

"Oh…I'm sorry. I feel like a complete jackass. From the way you two were behaving earlier, I assumed you knew each other well."

"We do. Meredith and I are _very_ close," he emphasized. "We're practically partners."

Ryan frowned at the use of the word "partners" to describe their friendship, but he let it slide feeling slightly relieved that he didn't let Meredith's pending divorce out to a stranger. "Well then, I assume you know about the divorce."

"She's seeking a divorce?" he asked, his heart sinking by the minute.

"Yes, that's why she came to see me. To have divorce papers drawn. She seemed to be in quite the hurry, even desperate, to get the paperwork" Ryan explained. "At first, I didn't understand but after hearing what she had to say about her husband, she's better off getting rid of him now. Personally, I think he's an ass and a complete moron for letting her go. Ouch!" He flinched in pain as Derek finished tying up the stitch, giving the string a hard tug as he used the scissors to cut the excess thread off.

"Are we finished here? I need to find Meredith to return the watch she left behind" said Ryan, standing up from the bed. He had a feeling that what he did was intentional and didn't care to stick around for much longer.

"I'm afraid Meredith is going to be busy for the next couple of hours." Derek replied, his back stiffening up as he stood back to let Ryan move past him.

"Oh, I see." Stuffing the watch back inside his pant pocket, he said "I'll give it to her tonight.

"You're seeing her again?" Derek asked the hurt and shock clearly visible in his eyes. "I didn't realize divorce attorneys worked late hours."

"We don't and I don't think it's any of your business."

"Have you met Meredith's husband, Mr…?"

"Matthews. Ryan Matthews and no I have not."

"Then don't you think it is rather presumptuous of you to call him an ass and moron without having met him?" Derek's question was met with a shocked stare from Ryan but he didn't care. He just found out Meredith is seeking to divorce him from none other than her pretty-boy lawyer and the guy has the audacity to call _him_ an ass and moron? "Do you impose your personal opinions on all weak unsuspecting women that walk into your office or is this reserved especially for women you find…intriguing," he finished, looking at Ryan with obvious disdain.

"You're being out of line and quite frankly, what Meredith does outside of work is none of your concern."

"You see, now that's where you're wrong," he said. He leaned in so their faces were inches apart and looking him dead in the eye, he hissed "I'm her husband and what she does outside of work is very much my concern."

"You didn't seem to be too concerned about her when you kissed the ex-fiancée," he said, giving Derek a smug satisfied look.

"We're inside a hospital with real sick people so I'll keep this as civilized as possible. You'd be wise to leave Meredith alone," he hissed, his fists clenched together at his sides to keep from throttling Ryan's neck "As I recall, she and I are very much married and unless the divorce papers are signed…which I can assure you they won't, I suggest you stay away from her."

"You don't scare me with your sorry attempt at a threat. I have no intention of leaving her alone unless Meredith tells me so." Straightening his shirt and tie, he gave Derek a smug smile and said "Right now, it's a safe bet to say she prefers _me_ over you so perhaps you should heed your own advice and stay away from—."

Ryan barely finished his sentence before he felt the sting of Derek's fist landing squarely on his jaw, causing him fall backwards. Glaring up at Derek, he stood up rubbing his jaw and hissed "If it weren't for Meredith, you'd be bleeding on the floor in pain."

"You don't scare me with your sorry excuse of a threat. Instead of hiding behind a woman, why don't you man up and show me, you fucking coward!"

"Oh, I'm going to hit you where it hurts alright. I'll make this divorce happen so fast it'll make your head spin. Enjoy your last days in marital—."

The second blow landed just below Ryan's right eye. The force of the impact caused Ryan to stumble back a few steps, his arms flailing about as he blindly reached for something to steady his fall. His hand missed the bed by a few inches and he fell ungracefully on the floor with a loud thump. By this time, a big crowd of people have formed just outside the ER cheering and shouting words of encouragement for both of them.

Meredith was on her way back from the lab when she heard yelling at the end of the hallway. She looked over curiously at the spectacle to see people pushing at each other trying to get a good look of what was going on inside the ER. A few of the younger nurses ran by and she heard one of them muttering something that sounded like "McDreamy's kicking McFudgeCake's ass."

Her heart fell when she heard it and barely allowing herself time to recover, she sprinted down the length of the hallway, carelessly pushing people aside until she managed to open a small hole and see inside. She let out a shocked gasp at the sight before her. Derek had Ryan in a choke hold and was punching him in the stomach. With strength she didn't know she had, she shoved her way past the people and grabbed Derek's arm as he was getting ready to throw another punch. "Stop it!"

"He started it!" accused Ryan as he massaged his neck after Meredith managed to pry it free from Derek's firm hold.

"You coward!" yelled Derek, trying to lunge at Ryan. Meredith stepped in between the two men and grabbed a hold of Derek's waist, pushing him back a few steps with her arms still wrapped tightly around him. His breathing was ragged and she could feel it fanning her cheeks as she looked up at him. He looked so angry and seeing him like this made her feel… Shaking her head, she turned to look at Ryan and said "I think you should leave."

"Meredith, you don't understand—," Ryan tried to explain, moving towards her.

"Please just do as I ask," she pleaded with him.

"He's going to hurt you again."

"I know…but he's my husband and I love him."


	25. Chapter 25

There was a collective gasp of shock from the group of doctors and nurses in the crowd. Meredith felt Derek stiffen but she didn't dare speak or move until Ryan was gone, mumbling under his breath as he walked out. The crowd parted to make way for him, their heads turning as they watched him exit the hospital doors. As soon as he was out of sight, they turned their heads as if in a trance to stare with peaked interest at the couple standing before them, her arms still embracing him. Slowly moving her head to one side, Meredith glanced past Derek's shoulder and winced when she saw that everyone stood rooted to their spot, waiting with bated breath to see what would happen next.

"You lo—,"

"Do _not_ utter another word!" she hissed, her voice low and demanding. "Your office. Now!"

"You're being bossy. I like it," he teased, a wicked glint in his eyes as he moved to wrap his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. He was either oblivious to the crowd of people still milling around or he didn't care, but either way Meredith had to stop it before she let herself succumb to him. His fingers were wreaking havoc on her nerves as they gently stroked her bare midriff that was left exposed just above the waistline of her pants.

Summoning up all the strength she had, she yanked herself out of his hold and slapped him. "Whoa…," she gasped, running her hands through her hair as if by doing so, it would ease the numbness from the sting of the slap.

For a second time that afternoon, the crowd let out a collective gasp as the people pushed up on each other to get a closer look. Absently rubbing his red cheek with his hand, he looked at her with a half shocked; half amused look on his face. He could see her open and shut her mouth a couple of times as she struggled to speak. Finally finding her tongue, she said "I…I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?"

"Yes," he said, smiling when she gave a gasp of horror at his unexpected response. "But I deserved it."

"Can we go to your office where it's private and I don't feel so much like a fish in a fishbowl?" she asked, lowering her voice as she nodded her head in the direction of the crowd.

"And ruin the show?" he smirked.

"This is not a show. We are not a show here for their entertainment. If you don't want to talk, I will just—"

"Fine. My office. Now" he responded, placing his hand on the small of her back as he led her out into the hallway. Their eyes never leaving the couple, the crowd parted once again to let them through. Meredith heard a few of the female nurses snicker as she walked by and her back stiffened, prompting Derek to ask "Are you okay?"

"Just get me out of here." Together, they walked down the hallway in complete silence.

"Mer?"

"What?" she snapped, her voice agitated.

"Can you say it again?"

"Say what again?"

"Say that you love me."

"I…," she paused when she saw the satisfied smirk on his face. "I hate you!" she snapped, pulling him inside his office and slamming the door shut. Releasing his arm, she walked to the opposite end of the room and stood with her arms crossed over her heaving chest, fuming with anger. "What the hell was that?" she demanded.

"What was what?" he asked, feigning innocence. The look of mischief dancing in the deep blue of his eyes, his perfectly shaped mouth spreading into a big grin.

"Don't play the innocent with me, because the way you were hitting and choking Ryan, you were anything _but_ innocent."

"He provoked me."

"So? You are a doctor. Doctors are supposed to help _save_ people, not inflict pain…and in a room full of patients no less! I mean, what were you thinking? Were you trying to prove your manhood? Prove who is the better man?" Letting out a bitter laugh, she continued "I'm surprised you didn't whip it out to see who had the bigger penis!"

"Meredith…"

"No! You had no right to do that. Ryan did not deserve any of that. He's the innocent party who unwittingly got dragged into this mess…our mess!"

"You're right," he agreed. "I am a doctor and I should have known better. It was juvenile and beneath me and I'm sorry."

"Well, okay then," she said, a little surprised that he agreed without so much as a fight.

"Is it true?" he asked, looking deep into her eyes searching for the answer. "What he said about the divorce…is it true?"

"I…we…it's…yes," she finally said, lowering her head in shame.

"You're not going to go through with it now, are you?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? You said you love me and you meant it. You did mean it, right?" he asked, sounding unsure.

"I…I don't know," she said, clearly struggling with the decision.

Taking a few short strides, he moved to stand right in front of her. "Meredith, please don't end this. Don't end _us_. I shouldn't have kissed Dani…I know that. It was stupid and if I could go back, I would change it in a heartbeat. I screwed up and don't deserve your forgiveness but I'm begging you. Please give us a chance." Placing a firm hand under her chin, he lifted her face so he could look into her eyes and said "Please forgive me."

"You hurt me," she said, her voice filled with pain.

"Yes," he agreed, saddened by the pain in her voice. "I'm sorry."

"How will I know it won't happen again? That you're not going to wake up one day and decide that you want to be with her.

"I won't."

"How can I be sure?" she asked her voice quivering as she fought to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. "You two were engaged! That's a huge commitment. You have history together. How am I supposed to compete with that?

"You don't. There's no competition here. There never was. Dani is a part of my past and that's not going to change, but you…you're my future and that is more important to me than anything. But I can't do this alone. If we're going to make it, I need to know you want it as much as I do. So…" he let out a long deep sigh and continued "do you want to be part of my life?"

"If we're going to do this, I need to know I can trust you."

"I'll do whatever you want me to do."

Smiling at his eagerness, she said "I haven't decided what I want yet. But when I do, it's going to be big." She reached for his right hand and turned it over to see that his knuckles were red and slightly swollen. Carefully running her fingers over the red mark, she looked up and asked "On a scale of 1 to 10…how bad is it?"

Feeling excited from the way her gentle fingers were touching his hand, he pouted and said "Eight."

Bending her head so her lips lingered a few millimeters from his hand, she looked up to steal a glance at him and noticed that his eyes had turned a deep smoky blue color as he watched her, transfixed. He let out a soft sigh when her lips touched the first knuckle, kissing it lightly. "And now?"

"Seven," he replied, his voice barely above a whisper as he felt her warm breath brush over the next knuckle.

"How about now?" She kissed it, letting her tongue dart out to trail a wet path from that knuckle to the next before planting another kiss.

"Six," he sighed, his breathing becoming ragged.

Meredith let go of his hand and moved to stand on tiptoe so she could wrap her arms fully around his neck. She leaned in and kissed him tentatively on his lips, looking deep into his eyes. "And now?" she teased, sucking lightly on his lower lip, their eyes never breaking contact.

Wrapping his arms tightly around her slim waist, he expelled a deep ragged sigh and said in a hoarse voice "Five." He lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her lips. "Four" Taking her lower lip into his, he sucked on it until it was swollen and releasing it, he continued with the countdown "Three" Suddenly, Meredith reached up and pulled his hair down so their lips crashed together and in that instant, the floodgates to their desire came bursting open and they deepened the kiss, letting their tongues explore the inner depths of their mouths, moaning softly and urgently as they sought for more. Moving his hand down her back, Derek reached his hand inside her top and began an erotic trail up her bare midriff, moving across her ribcage to cup an aching breast, loving the feel of its weight in his hands. Slowly, he began to massage her breast, increasing the tempo when he heard her moan his name.

They heard a soft knock on the door and quickly pulled apart. Meredith was blushing like a schoolgirl as she tried to adjust her top. He looked at her and waited until she gave him a nod before answering the door.

"Dr. Shepherd." Meredith heard a female voice on the other side of the door. She recognized the voice and knew it belonged to the Chief's secretary. "The Chief wants to see you in his office."

"Tell him I'll be there in 5 minutes. Thank you." He shut the door and turned to look at her. "I wonder what he could possibly want to talk to me about," he said, trying to make a joke when he saw the worried guilt-ridden look on her face.

"It's all my fault," she said, her voice coming out a little shaky. "I'll come with you and explain that it's my fault and you had nothing to do with it."

Smiling at how thoughtful she was being, he looked at her and said "It's going to be tough believing I had nothing to do with it when it was me that had Ryan's neck in a choke hold." He let out a small chuckle.

"It's not funny!" she said, hitting his arm. "I'm serious, Derek. I feel like it's my fault that you're in this mess."

"It's not your fault and stop saying it is. I'm a grown man and I should have had more restraint. I will explain to the Chief and he will either understand or fire me"

"Stop it!" she yelled, cupping her ears with her hands. "I can't let you take the fall for this."

"Meredith. I love you and I love that you want to take the blame but I can handle this. Promise me you won't beat yourself over this. Everything will be okay."

"It will?" she asked, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"It will. Now wipe those tears off your pretty face. I'm going to talk to the Chief and when we finish our shift tonight, you and I are going on our first date."

"Second."

"What?"

"Our second date."

"Ah… I thought the first one was not a real date. As I remember, you went through great pains to convince your friends and me that it wasn't a date."

"Shut up," she said, smiling at him as she wiped her tears away. "You're late and you don't want to piss the Chief off more than he is already."

"I'll just tell him I have a demanding, bossy wife that wouldn't let me leave. I'm sure he can empathize with me," he winked and leaned down to plant a swift kiss on her lips before walking out the door.


	26. Chapter 26

Derek reached the Chief's office and stood outside the door, nervously adjusting his coat before he held his hand up and firmly knocked on the door. The knock was met with silence as he stood waiting a few more seconds before knocking again. This time, he heard a loud bump followed by an even louder "ouch" and sharp expletive. He cringed for he knew the Chief's disposition was probably made worse by whatever it was that caused him to scream pain. He was about to turn and leave when the door was yanked open to reveal the Chief standing there with a growl on his face and one of hand rubbing a spot on the back of his head.

"Is this a bad time?" asked Derek, hoping it was so he could make his escape.

"No. Come in," replied the Chief as he stepped aside to allow Derek to walk past him. Derek scanned the room and saw the top filing cabinet sitting open behind the Chief's desk and suspected that he probably hit his head on it. Turning back to look at the Chief, he asked "Are you okay?"

"Of course I'm not okay!" snapped the Chief as he moved to sit in his chair. "I hit my head on the damn filing cabinet. I thought I locked it. I always keep it locked, but the damn drawer slid open and I bumped my head. I need to tell Marge to stop oiling the tracks so much."

Derek didn't know how to respond to the Chief's rant so he leaned back in his chair and waited patiently for him to finish. Most people get intimidated by the Chief. Derek; however, find him amusing and knows that his bark is always bigger than his bite. Richard is a kind, understanding and reasonable man. Those qualities will definitely be put to the test today thought Derek to himself.

"We both know why I called you here, so let's get down to it," said the Chief as he leaned back in his chair, lacing his fingers together to lay rested on his lap.

"There's no excuse for what I did. It was irresponsible and unethical of me as a doctor. Before you say anything, I want to make it clear that it was all my doing and no one else's."

"Nice try, but I know Meredith is as much involved in this as you are. She may not have been the one throwing punches, but she was involved nonetheless."

"Richard. Leave her out of this. She's young and has great potential as a surgeon. If this goes on her record, it's going to ruin her career. If you want to punish someone, punish me. I take full responsibility."

"Who said anything about punishing? I'm tough, but I'm not heartless. I know Meredith has great potential. It's in her genes. I called you here to try and understand what happened to provoke you into hitting a man. The board is going to want an explanation as well as the attorney for the hospital. I want to make sure I have the facts so if and when we're slapped with a lawsuit, we'll be prepared."

"I'm sorry, Richard. I never meant for any of this to happen."

"Yes, but it did happen, so explain it to me make me understand"

Derek took a deep breath and began to tell the story, starting in Vegas. After twenty minutes, the Chief leaned back in his chair and let out a deep breath as he struggled to absorb everything Derek had just told him.

"So you two met and got married in Vegas?"

"Yes."

"You met _before_ you came here and already knew each other when I first introduced you?"

"Yes."

"You wanted to give the marriage a try, but she felt pressured so you gave her an ultimatum?"

"Yes,"

"That was stupid, by the way"

"Thanks."

"She saw you with Dr. Perkins and thought you were having an affair?"

"Yes."

"You and Dr. Perkins were once engaged?"

"Yes."

"But that was _before_ you married Addison?"

"Yes."

"Geez, man! Who do you think you are? Ross?"

"I don't know what's scarier…you watching 'Friends' or me knowing exactly what you were talking about."

"Er…let's move on."

"Fine."

"So she thinks you're having an affair and seeks a divorce?"

"Yes."

"This divorce lawyer makes a move on Meredith, then shows up and calls you an ass and a moron?"

"Yes."

"And that's when you punched him?"

"Yes."

Letting out a deep breath, the Chief leaned forward in his chair and looked at Derek solemnly. "Well, there's only one thing left to say."

Derek held his breath as he waited for the Chief to speak. After a long pause, he got antsy and asked "Well?"

"Did you put your weight behind it?"

Derek's face broke out into a big grin and he replied "Sure did."

"Okay," said the Chief as he stood up to walk around his desk. "I have all the information I need. Thank you."

"Wait a minute," Derek said, looking up at him in confusion. "Aren't you going to fire me?"

"Fire you? Why would I do something stupid like that?"

"Not to dig a hole in my own grave, but I beat up a man in full view of the hospital staff and sick patients."

"Well, now that you put it that way."

"Let me—"

"Relax Derek. You are the best neurosurgeon there is. What you did was wrong, but you did it to defend your marriage and that is honorable. I will talk to the Board and explain."

Getting up from the chair, the Chief walked Derek to the door and said "So where do you and Meredith stand with this marriage?"

"We're going to give it a try," he replied, smiling as he remembered the way she kissed his hand earlier.

"I'm happy to hear that. I guess congratulations are in order," he said, giving Derek a firm pat on the back.

"Thanks Richard. Thanks for everything."

"Don't thank me too soon," replied the Chief, giving him another pat. "There may come a day when I will need to call on you for a favor."

The last comment worried Derek a little, but he shrugged it off, grateful that he still had a job and he could be close to Meredith. When they reached the door, he turned to smile at the Chief before reaching for the handle.

"Derek!" the Chief called to him, causing him to turn around. "The next time you and Meredith get into an argument, make sure you keep it outside. I don't want to have any more brawls in my hospital. Got it?" He smiled and turned away, rubbing his head.

* * *

Meredith was sitting at a corner table on the outdoor patio, absently playing with her fruit bowl when Cristina and Izzie walked up, dropping their trays onto the table with a loud thud.

"Ugh…I'm so tired, I don't think I have the energy to eat," complained Izzie as she collapsed onto the chair.

"At least you _can_ eat," replied Cristina, giving her food a distasteful look before shoving her tray away. "Bailey's got me digging through shit for stupid Monopoly pieces. I'm a surgeon! Surgeons don't stick their hands in shit!" She jabbed her fork into Meredith's fruit bowl and shoved a piece of watermelon into her mouth. Waving the fork at Izzie, she continued with her rant "It would've been easier to cut him open and take it all out at once. That way, I'd still get to be in surgery."

"You're sick," said Izzie, frowning at Cristina. "We're here to help everyone."

"Whatever, Barbie. Go take your bright and shiny rays somewhere else," she snapped. "You got to help on the TTTS case with Dr. McKissy so don't preach to me."

"You're just jealous!" replied Izzie, sticking her tongue out at Cristina.

"So?"

"So you're a mean bitch when you're jealous."

"I'm a mean bitch all the time. What's your point?"

"Whatever. I'm too tired to argue with you." Turning to Meredith, Izzie asked "Did you do anything interesting today? I've been stuck in Peds all morning."

"Yes Mer, did you do anything interesting today?" asked Cristina.

"No…nothing…interesting," she said, averting her eyes to pretend to pick at a seed on a melon.

"Hmm…well I heard something interesting," said Cristina, stealing a glance in Meredith's direction "It seems McDreamy got into a scuffle with a patient in the ER."

Meredith's cheeks turned a deep crimson red as she slightly lowered her head, letting her hair fall forward to cover her face. For the second time, she wished the ground would open up and swallow her.

"Oh no, he didn't!" shrieked Izzie, her eyes nearly bulging out of her head.

"Oh yes, he did" replied Cristina calmly.

"What happened?" Izzie whispered excitedly as she moved to scoot her chair closer to the group.

"I don't know," Cristina answered, shrugging her shoulders. "Maybe Mer can tell us."

Meredith snapped her head up and glared at Cristina "Me? Why me? I—I don't know anything." She lied, nervously tugging at the band of her watch. "Why are you asking me?" she continued defensively. "Just because it involved Derek, you assume I know?" She knew she had to bite the bullet and tell them eventually. But at the moment, she was too preoccupied thinking about Derek and his meeting with the Chief.

"Well…yeah" replied Cristina and Izzie in unison.

"That and also the fact that you were assigned to SCUT today," said Cristina.

"Well I wouldn't know. Bailey took me off SCUT and assigned me to the Katie Bryce case."

"Hmm… Was that _before_ or _after_ you told half the hospital you two are married?" asked Cristina casually as she took a bite into a melon and looked at Meredith with a raised brow. Izzie gasped so hard, she almost choked on her sandwich.

"You told _everyone_ you and Derek are married?" Izzie yelled once she recovered.

"Not everyone, but thanks to your outburst, I'm sure everyone knows now," she snapped before turning to address Cristina. "If you knew, how come you didn't just come out and say it?"

"I wanted to see you squirm a little," she replied, smiling smugly. "Now tell me what the hell happened."

She sat back and told them everything that happened from when Derek told her he loved her, to them being interrupted by Ryan, to her being paged by Bailey and leaving the two men alone together.

"What are you going to do?" asked Cristina.

"I don't know. He got called into the Chief's office and I'm a nervous wreck."

"I meant what are you going to do about the divorce?"

"I don't know," she said, looking down at her hands. "I can't stop thinking about that kiss. I want to forget it, but whenever I close my eyes that's all I see." Wringing her hands together in her angst, she continued "As much as he hurt me and as badly as my heart is hurting right now…it hurts a hundred times more when I'm not with him. I'm pathetic."

"You're not pathetic, Mer. You're in love and that's okay," consoled Izzie.

"Th—" she stopped when she heard her pager go off. Fumbling to reach for the pager with nerveless fingers, she silently prayed it was Derek. She looked at the display, then to her friends curiously before shoving it back into the clip and rushed off with a quick "I talk to you later."


	27. Chapter 27

Meredith's legs were trembling as she approached the nurse's station. Walking up to one of the nurses sitting behind the desk, she asked "You paged me?"

"I had you paged," said someone from behind. Meredith winced when she recognized the voice and turned to see Dani standing there.

"There has been a mistake," replied Meredith, with cool indifference. "Dr. Stevens is on your service. I have nothing to say to you." She turned to give the nurse a cold stare, knowing she had listened to the whole thing and stormed off.

"Dr. Grey!" Dani called after her, her heels could be heard clicking on the tile as she ran after her. "Dr. Grey! Wait!" Meredith silently cursed her for being so damn persistent and picked up her pace, almost running towards the elevator. "Meredith! Please stop! I want to ex—"

The elevator doors opened and she ran in and frantically pushed the button, praying it would close faster. She looked up and saw Dani running down the corridor towards the elevator. She let out a sigh of relief as the doors began closing, knowing she wasn't going to make it on time. She was about to collapse against the wall when Dani stuck her hand between the 3 inch opening and pushed the door open. She rushed in and used her body to block the door as Meredith made a move to leave.

"Please, let me explain."

"What's there to explain? You kissed Derek and he kissed you back," she hissed her voice low and controlled.

"I didn't _know_ you two were together, let alone married."

"But you said—"

"I know what I said, but I was referring to his ex-wife Addison when I said it," she explained, looking straight at Meredith. "I never should have kissed him and I'm very sorry you had to see it. This is not an excuse, by any means, but I was trying to get rid of a pesky guy who wouldn't take no for an answer and asked Derek to play along as my boyfriend."

"So that's all it was? Just an act?"

"That's all it was," she said, giving Meredith a tentative smile. "If it's any consolation, he said kissing me felt like kissing a cold fish."

"He said that?" Meredith asked, feeling slightly embarrassed for Dani and annoyed with Derek's insensitivity. "He's an ass for saying that."

"I know. He's also an ass for giving you the ultimatum," said Dani hesitantly, unsure of how Meredith would react to her knowing. When she saw Meredith's eyes soften and her lips curl into a smile, she continued "I hope it isn't too late."

"It's not," said Meredith, her mind already made up after talking to Cristina and Izzie. "I mean, I did talk to a lawyer about drawing up divorce papers but I don't think I can go through with it." She smiled when she saw Dani let out a big sigh of relief. "He's an ass, but he's my ass and I kind of like having him around."

"It makes me very happy to hear that."

"Thank you for explaining. You didn't have to, but I'm glad you did."

"I only did it because of Derek. He means the world to me and I hated seeing him in so much pain," she paused to look at Meredith. "He deserves to be loved and I trust you will be the one to give him what he never got with Addison."

* * *

Over three hours had passed since Derek left his office to meet with the Chief. Three long agonizing hours, in which Meredith continually checked her pager, even going so far as changing out the batteries, waiting anxiously for Derek to page her with some sort of news. She was a nervous wreck and found it difficult to concentrate, even while she was busy tending to her needy patient. Katie Bryce was turning out to be a difficult patient, always demanding Meredith's time, even if it's to sit there and listen to her endless stories about beauty pageants and rhythmic aerobics. She was beginning to nod off after the umpteenth pageant story when her pager went off. Her face fell when she discovered that it wasn't Derek, but was grateful all the same for finally having an excuse to leave the chatty little teen.

She was exhausted as she made her way down the hall toward the nurse's station yet again. She almost reached it, when a door to her left suddenly swung open and she was pulled inside.

"What the hell!" she exclaimed as she forcefully yanked her arm free from the grip. When she looked up and realized who is was, she began punching him in the chest.

"Where have you been?" she yelled, while continuing to hit him on the chest. "I was worried crazy thinking about you! I couldn't eat. I couldn't concentrate. I had to endure hours of listening to a teen talk about beauty pageants and rhythmic aerobics! What the hell that is, I have no idea! I changed the batteries to my pager, not once…but TWICE!" She yelled as she continued to pound on his chest, pushing him backward so he bumped up against a desk. "Why didn't you call or page me?"

Taking a firm hold of her wrists to prevent her from doing more damage, he pulled her in close to him and tried to explain "Mer—"

"Shut up! I'm not done yelling!" Her rant continues as she tries to pull her wrists free. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? What would I have done without you? How am I sup—"

"Meredith…" he pleaded with her.

"I said shut up!" she yelled, her chest rising and falling, her anger barely contained. "All I wanted was a page…a simple page to let me know you were okay." Giving him a quick once-over, she looked up at him and said through gritted teeth "Now that I can see you're okay, I can kill you!" She tried to pull her wrists free, but to no avail. "Let me go!"

"Never," he said before his lips came crashing down on hers, preventing her from finishing her sentence. The feel of his lips on hers left her breathless and in shock as she tried to resist. Capturing his lower lip between her teeth, she bit down on it hard, seeing the sudden pain that darkened his gaze. Despite the pain throbbing in his lower lip, he deepened the kiss, his lips demanding and unyielding as they plundered hers.

"I hate you," she said before standing on tiptoe to gain better access to his lips. Derek smiled into their kiss and eased the pressure as his lips trailed a wet path across her swollen lips, his tongue darting inside to coax her lips further apart. Meredith swayed unsteadily towards him as she gave into the kiss, moaning as his tongue met and mate with hers.

Without breaking the kiss, Derek shifted their position so he sat on the edge of the desk, effectively lowering himself to her level and parting his outstretched legs to maneuver her to stand between them. Letting go of her wrists, he moved his hand up to hold her face between his hands as he angled his mouth over hers, kissing her with long drugging kisses that seduced his senses, leaving them both with an intense feeling of mindless abandon. He moved his hands down to wrap them around her waist and pulled her into closer contact with his body. Her lashes veiled her green eyes as her tiny hands moved to spread across his chest, relishing the feel of the muscled wall underneath her delicate fingers as it trailed further up over his shoulders to rest at the nape of his neck. As she leaned in even closer, her breasts flattened against his chest and she heard him moan "I've missed you so much."

Playing with the soft curls, she reached higher into his scalp and grabbed a handful of his dark raven hair, tugging at it as she pulled her lips free from his. Together they stood with his hands still wrapped tightly around her waist, her hands entangled in his hair, their faces millimeters apart as they stared deeply into each other eyes, letting their ragged breathing calm down to a steady pace. "You scared me," she whispered, her voice laced with emotion.

"I know," he said, his eyes searching hers, silently asking for forgiveness.

"Don't do it again."

"Okay."

"Where did you go?"

"I had to take care of a few things after I talked to the Chief," he explained, kissing her again.

"What kind of things?" she asked, reluctantly breaking the kiss. "Is…is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine. It's perfect." He planted a swift kiss on her lips and released his arms. "I have to prep for a surgery soon, but I'll see you tonight okay?"

"Okay," she nodded and moved back to fix her clothing. "I should get going too."

He gave her a reassuring smile and walked over to the door. "Derek?" she called after him. With his hand on the door, he turned to her with a questioning look. "I don't hate you."

"I don't hate you either," he replied, giving her a wink before walking out.

* * *

The rest of the day seemed to fly by as Meredith checked on Katie Bryce one last time before going to change for her date with Derek. After seeing him kiss Dani three days ago, she never thought she would be going on a date or doing _anything_ with him, for that matter. Things were starting to look up and she was finally allowing herself to be happy. Even the gossip and snickering from the young nurses did not dampen her mood. She could see their jealous eyes trained on her as she walked down the hall and all it did was make her smile at their envy. She knew Derek was a catch and a lot of the nurses had tried to vie for his attention when he first showed up at Seattle. With a slight bounce in her step, she began to hum softly under her breath as she walked into the locker room. From the corner of her eyes, she could see Cristina and Izzie lying on the bench rubbing their temples, groaning about how tired and achy their muscles were.

"Today is the day people. Today is the day when 'dark and twisty' Meredith disappears forever! And 'bright and shiny' Meredith takes her place." Cristina and Izzie both opened their eyes to look at her in annoyance at her happy demeanor. Cristina lifted one of her legs and tried to kick her in the butt, but she was quick and moved away. Still smiling, she stuck her tongue at Cristina and continued "You're probably not going to want to be friends with me anymore, because the sheer intensity of my happiness is going to make your teeth hurt. That's okay, because life is good. Life is good!"

"Why are you so happy?" grumbled Cristina as she placed a hand over her eyes to shield the light.

"I have a date!"

"A date?" repeated Cristina, as if that word sounded foreign to her.

"Yes…a date. It's what people do when they want to know more about each other. They wear nice clothes, go to nice places, eat a nice dinner, and have a nice conversation that is not related to work" answered Izzie as she sat up and began to undress.

"What the hell is the matter with _you_?" snapped Cristina, as she turned to sneer at Izzie.

"I'm jealous, okay? I'm jealous because Meredith's got Derek…er, I mean I don't…I'm not jealous because _I_ want Derek," she corrected when she saw Meredith raise a questioning brow and continued "I'm just jealous because Meredith is married and going on a date and being all couple-y. Alex and I are having sex in supply rooms, yet I can't get him to commit to having coffee with me outside of this damn hospital. All he ever talks about is surgery and blood and slicing people open!"

"Maybe you two should take a road trip to Vegas. It seemed to have done wonders for the McDream team over here," retorted Cristina, sarcastically. "Marriage is over-rated. Stick to the penis. It's less complicated."

"You're bitter!"

"You're desperate!"

"You're jealous!"

"You're blond!"

"I got to operate while you sifted through shit!"

"Is that the best you could do, big-breasted Barbie?"

"Shut up, flat…" paused Izzie, struggling to think of a witty comeback and weakly finished with "bread"

Trying to restrain her laughter, Cristina looked at her with a raised brow and asked "Flatbread? Seriously? Was that the best you could think of? Rice paper would've been better." The three of them exploded into laughter and finished getting dressed.


	28. Chapter 28

Meredith saw him as soon as the elevator doors opened in the main lobby. He was sitting in a chair, typing into his Blackberry. He looked up as soon as he heard footsteps and gave her his best dreamy smile. Cristina mumbled something underneath her breath and both she and Izzie walked out, yelling their goodbyes over their shoulders.

"I think Dr. Yang hates me."

"Yes," she replied, not bothering to deny it. She let out a soft giggle when he pretended to be hurt.

"But you don't hate me," he said, giving her a boyish grin.

"I don't hate you."

"Good. Because the night would be ruined if you did."

"Where are you taking me?" she asked her excitement showing in her eyes.

"We're going to dinner?"

"Dinner?" she asked, her voice dropped in disappointment. She didn't know why she felt disappointed, just that she was.

"Yes dinner…real food, waiters, big chunks of carbs in a basket."

"Oh…"

"Were you expecting something else?"

"No! It's just that this afternoon…well, I thought that we'd…. Nevermind." She shook her head and put on a happy smile, hoping it would mask her disappointment. It didn't.

"I have a surprise for you after dinner."

"A surprise? Really?" she asked, her eyes lighting up in obvious delight. "What is it?"

Tapping the bridge of her nose with his finger, he smiled at her and said "If I told you, it wouldn't be much of a surprise then, would it?"

* * *

"Where are you taking me?"

"For the hundredth time, I'm not going to tell you so just sit back and enjoy the ride." Derek gave her a sideways glance and smiled at the pout she gave him.

"Can I get a hint?"

"No."

"Not even a tiny little one?"

"No."

"A little, itty bitty one?"

"No."

"Just give me one word. I'm really good at guessing."

"Meredith," he said, trying to feign frustration when in reality he found her childlike eagerness rather endearing.

"I'm not asking for much…just one word. Please?" she pleaded, batting her eyelashes at him unashamedly.

"If I give you a word, will you promise to stay quiet until we get there?"

"Yes."

"Promise me first."

"Okay, I promise"

"My word is…. Are you paying attention?" he asked, grinning at the broad smile of satisfaction that flashed across her face.

"Yes! Now tell me," she demanded, shifting in her seat as she eagerly awaited the hint.

"My word is….," he paused to take a deep breath, seeing the anticipation building in her green eyes. "No."

"What?"

"No."

She reached across to the driver's side and slapped his arm. "That's not a word!"

"It is _too_ a word."

"You cheated!"

"I did not," he said, smiling smugly to himself. "We never discussed the terms of the agreement."

"You knew—."

"Uh-uh…you promised not to say another word, remember?"

"But you—"

"Shh!"

"Cheated!" she finished her sentence and glared at him challengingly.

"No talking!"

"You—"

He reached across and placed a hand on her mouth, effectively stopping her from finishing her sentence. "I said, no more." In sheer frustration, Meredith opened her mouth and bit down hard on his hand.

"Ouch!" he yelped at the pain. Turning his head to glare at her, his brows furrowed together when he saw the smirk on her face. "Say you're sorry."

Crossing her arms over her chest, she shook her head emphatically and stared at him like a petulant child. "Mm-hmm," she mumbled, her hand gesturing to her mouth indicating that she is not supposed to talk, per their agreement.

"What am I going to do with you?" he asked, rubbing the red spot on his hand.

She stuck her tongue out to him and crossed her arms over her chest more firmly. Derek released a hearty laugh and reached for her hand, bringing it up to kiss her palm. "We're almost there, my stubborn wife." As hard as she wanted to remain mad, she couldn't help but smile at the way he called her his wife.

* * *

Not more than five minutes had passed before Meredith started up with her questions again. "Are we there yet?"

"We're close."

"How close is "close"?" she queried.

"Close," he said, trying to stifle a laugh at the face she made.

"Derek!"

"Meredith!" he grinned at her.

"You're making this hard on purpose?"

"_I'm_ making this hard? Me?" he asked, looking at her incredulously.

"We've been driving _forever_," she whined.

"It's only been forty-five minutes."

"Seriously?" she asked in disbelief.

"Seriously."

"Why does it feel like we've been driving for weeks?"

"Because you keep thinking about it."

"That's because I have nothing _else_ to think about," she complained, her face clearly showing her unhappiness. Her grin went from unhappy and pouty to one of confusion as the car made several small turns down a dimly lit street and slowed to a halt. She looked outside the window and began to panic as she asked "Uh…Derek, are we lost?"

"Nope," he quickly replied as he killed the engine and opened the door to get out.

Reaching for the buckle to her seatbelt, she hastily unfastened it as she turned to kneel on the seat. Her gaze followed Derek as he made his way to retrieve something from the trunk of the car. Her eyes did a quick sweep of their surroundings and all she could make out in the semi-darkness were shadows from the tall trees all around them. She could see the moon through the small gaps between the thick tree trunks.

_Where are we?_

Just then, the passenger side door opened and Derek extended his hand inside to offer her help out of the car. She took hold of it and jumped out, wrapping herself tightly around his arm. He bent his head and planted a swift kiss on the top of her head as he led her down a small dirt path that cut into the trees. Meredith's heart was pounding against her chest, her nerves on edge as she followed his lead.

"Derek?"

"Hmm?"

"Where are we?"

"I know I said we were going to dinner, but there's something I want to show you first."

He reached for her hand, his fingers lacing with hers as he picked up his pace. Within a few short strides, they walked out onto a vast open area, the rich earthly soil covered by a nice layer of lush green grass. Meredith sucked in a deep breath as her eyes took in the breathtaking view before her. To her left, the soft rolling hills led down to a lake whose calm and serene waters reflected the full moon that hung overhead.

A faint smile spread across Meredith's face as her eyes moved from the lake, across the expanse of the land before her, up to her right where she saw a silver trailer perched atop the highest part of the hill. Her smile faded slightly as her brows furrowed together in confusion and she turned to Derek and asked "What is this place?"

"This," he said, his hand gesturing to the trailer "is where I live."

"You live here?"

"Are you okay with that?" he asked. He was nervous that she was going to be turned off by the fact that he lived in a trailer instead of a big expensive home in the rich suburbs of Seattle. His thoughts immediately went to Addison and he knew that she would scoff at the mere idea of living in what she classifies as "sub-standard".

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Nothing," he quickly replied. "It's just that most people don't expect world renowned surgeons to live in a small confined trailer that barely fit two people on a good day."

"I am not like most people," she retorted.

"I know," he said, feeling guilty for assuming the worst.

"And…" She released his hand and walked a few steps toward the trailer. A soft smile spread across her lips as she took in the quaint setting. Her eyes fell onto a hammock that was situated off to the side of the wooden deck and she could envision her and Derek laying together on it, gazing up into the starry summer nights. "I happen to like small confined places. It's nice and cozy."

Derek's heart leaped into his throat as he released the breath he had been holding while he waited for her to finish what she had to say. Suddenly, he felt silly for being so nervous about her reaction. After the fiasco with Dani and Ryan, he meant what he told her in his office about him wanting to share his future with her. Today was going to be a new start to their life together and he wanted no secrets…big or small…to be kept between them.

"You and I seem to do very well in small confined places," he said with a devilish grin as he remembered their stolen kisses in the elevator, the amazing on-call room sex, and the hot kiss they shared in his office earlier in the day.

It seemed that Meredith also remembered those moments as she turned to him, a twinkle in her eyes as she reached her hand out to him and whispered in a desire-filled voice "Take me for a tour, Derek."


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N – Thank you everyone for reading my fic and leaving a comment. I truly appreciate each and every one of them.**

**This chapter is rated M, so please read at your own risk and enjoy. :-)**

* * *

With their fingers laced together, they walked up the short path to the trailer and climbed the steps leading onto the large wooden deck. Meredith noticed that the hammock was bigger than she had originally thought as it gently swayed back and forth to the light breeze, its slow movements hypnotic and inviting as she pictured her and Derek cuddling together on it. Her eyes darkened as her mind strayed to something else that they could be doing on it, but she quickly shook her head to rid herself of her very porny thoughts. Being sex deprived after all this time was not good for her mental state as her mind wandered, yet again, to the trailer and how sturdy the supports were.

Derek was busy searching in his jean pockets for the keys and was completely oblivious to the fact that Meredith's eyes had become desire-filled as she watched the way his jeans tightened across his perfectly shaped ass every time he stuck his hand inside the pockets. The tip of her tongue slipped through her slightly parted lips to moisten them as her soft panting became more erratic, making her throat and lips dry. The longer she stood staring at his ass, the more she wanted to rip his clothes off and have her way with him out in the cold, crisp open air. She shook her head a little more forcefully to reign in her urges and even had to resort to flexing her fingers to keep from reaching for him.

"Stop it!"

The sudden outburst caused Derek to stop what he was doing and turn to look at her, his eyes questioning. "Stop what?"

"Huh?" she asked her mind still fuzzy from her impure thoughts. She hadn't realized that she spoke out loud and feigned innocence when he gave her a quizzical look.

"You said stop."

"I did?"

"Yeah."

"Oh."

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"What do you want to stop?"

_This torture your body is putting me through with this long agonizing wait. Where are those damn keys?!_

"N-nothing" she lied, her eyes lowering to stare at his lips.

"Are you okay?" Derek's brows furrowed together as he tried to figure what was going on with her odd behavior.

"Yeah, I'm fine!" she replied, her eyes moving to his muscled chest as her throat became dry as she imagined her hands touching it.

_This is sad. I'm ogling my husband and he's too busy searching for those damn keys to notice._

"Are you sure? Because your cheeks look a little flushed."

"I'm fine. I need…I just…I'm a little anxious to get inside, that's all," she replied weakly, her voice becoming more desperate as the minutes passed.

"Found them!" he exclaimed, smiling proudly as he held a key up to show her.

"Thank god," she mumbled under her breath. "Do you think we can go in now?"

Derek sensed the urgency in her voice and mistook it as nervousness at being outside in a dark, secluded, wooded area. "It's safe here, Mer."

"What?"

"I own several acres and this land is private property so there will be no outside intruders," he explained. "It's just you and me."

"Good."

Derek opened the door and stepped aside to allow her to walk in first before following her in and closing the door. He turned the locks and flipped on the light switch before tossing the key onto the small dinette table. "Let's get this tour started," he joked, knowing that they had a good view of the entire trailer from where they stood.

"Before we start, there's something I want to do first."

"Oh? What's tha—"

He barely finished his sentence before Meredith pushed him up against the door and began kissing him frantically. Her lips were hot and eager as her mouth sought and plundered his in a rush of uncontrollable need. Derek was taken aback by her sudden onslaught as she ravaged his lips.

Smiling into their kiss, he released a deep, throaty moan and opened his mouth to allow her tongue entry to seek and mate with his. His arms went around her slim waist to pull her in for a tight embrace as his fingers playfully stroked the bare skin left exposed by her small baby tee. His fingers deftly slipped underneath her shirt to touch her heated flesh as he gently massaged her ribcage and moved further still until his fingers grazed the underside of her silk clad breasts.

Together they stood with their bodies pressed up against each other, letting the kiss continue while their moans echoed throughout the trailer. Meredith reached her hands up to twine into his hair and tugged on it silken strands, pulling his head down further so she could deepen their kiss.

Derek was thoroughly enjoying how aggressive she was being, but he knew that if they didn't stop kissing, they would end up having sex against the hard, cold metal door.

"Um…Mer?"

"Hmm?" She released his swollen lips and began planting soft kisses along his jaw to his ear where she nipped and tugged on the soft lobe. "What do you want?" she whispered.

The sexual undertone of that question along with the feel of her warm breath fanning his cheek was enough to make him lose all train of thought and soon he didn't care if they made love on the floor as long as he was inside her again.

"You. I want you," he groaned, his fervent desire threatening to consume him as he cupped her swollen breasts in his hands, gently kneading it until he felt her hardened nipples straining against the silk fabric.

"Oh my god, Derek…" she whimpered, her body writhing against his.

The need to feel his naked body against hers became too much to bear and in her frustration, her hands reached out and pulled his shirt free from his pants. She began to unbutton his shirt, kissing the exposed skin of his muscled chest. Grabbing onto the collar, she pulled him away from the door and began walking backwards towards the bedroom where the king size bed was beckoning to them. She released a small giggle as she stumbled, but he caught her in time and with slow purposeful steps, they continued to make their way to the bed.

Meredith let out a yelp in delighted surprise as the back of her knees hit the edge of the bed and she fell backwards to sit on the bed. Her eyes became eye level with his bulge as it strained against his pants, begging for release. Looking up so their eyes met, she gave him a wicked smile and began to unbuckle his belt. Next, her hands deftly pulled the zipper down and she reached inside to release his hardened penis.

Derek's eyes darkened into deep pools of desire as he watched Meredith's fingers gently stroke his shaft, bringing his aroused state to a whole new level he didn't know existed. He took a sharp intake of breath as his eyes fell onto her mouth, watching it move within an inch of his throbbing erection. He stared, mesmerized, as her lips parted slightly and holding his breath, he waited in eager anticipation to feel its warmth enclose all around him. He let his eyes flutter shut as he felt her hot breath on him.

Instead of taking his thick member into her mouth like she knew he wanted…like _she_ wanted, she stood up suddenly, causing his eyes to snap open to see her face a mere fraction of an inch from his. He saw the look of mischief in her eyes as she stood up on tiptoes and gave him a long drugging kiss.

"Tease," he groaned, pretending to be upset but the flicker of amusement in his eyes gave it away.

"Isn't it much more fun this way?" she whispered.

"Fun for whom?" he replied, his voice caught in his throat as she gave his erection a light squeeze.

"For me," she kissed his lips and continued "for you". Reaching her hands inside his open shirt, she ran her fingers up to his broad shoulders and slipped the shirt off as she tossed it carelessly on the floor. She turned them around and sat him down on the bed, her hands moving to rest on his chest as she pushed him back onto the cool sheets. Looking deep into his lust filled eyes, she began to undress, their eyes never breaking contact. Once she was fully naked, she kneeled down onto the floor and quickly helped him dispose of whatever remaining pieces of clothing he had on. "And…for him," she finished, her eyes falling onto his erection that was on prominent display to her adoring gaze. Still kneeling in front of him, she took his swollen length into her small delicate hands and gingerly moved her fingers up and down, eliciting a gasping moan from Derek.

"Oh my god, Meredith…" he sighed.

She continued to touch him, her movements slow and tentative at first. His gasping moans seemed to spur her on as her strokes became more feverish, her fingers moving in a faster rhythm. Derek's body shook in a mixture of pleasure and pain as she squeezed and rubbed his sensitive tip with the pad of her thumb. He felt his muscles tighten and tried to raise himself off the bed to still her movements if he was going to last the night. Before his mind was able to register what she was doing as she lowered her head, he felt her warm breath tickle the tip of his penis as her mouth enclosed around him.

"Jesus, Mer!" he gasped in shock, as his hips bucked at the feel of her taking his full length into the warm recesses of her mouth.

Her teeth lightly grazed him and he nearly lost it as his hands reached out to grab her hair and pull it back so he could see what she was doing to him. He watched, mesmerized, as she moved up and down his shaft, pulling her mouth away to flick her tongue on its swollen tip before taking it into her mouth to continue sucking and licking.

From his reaction, she knew that the tip was his most sensitive spot so she took great care in giving it the proper attention it craved by running the tip of her tongue in slow circles, alternating it with quick strokes, moving up and down at a slow agonizing pace before quickening it.

"If you don't stop doing that, I don't think I'm going to last."

Meredith giggled softly as she released him and began to move up over his body, her legs straddling him as she moved to position herself above his hardened peak. She was about to lower herself onto him when he reached out and in one swift movement, he maneuvered their bodies so that he was now on top of her. "Not yet, my beautiful wife."

Meredith watched, her eyes glowing with excitement as he moved down her body, his hot lips trailing a burning path from the valley of her aching breasts, across her hardened rose-tipped nipples, down past her ribcage to her navel where his tongue shot out to run small lazy circles as it elicited an excited gasping moan from her parted lips. Meredith felt a sharp, electrifying ripple rush through her body down to her heated core which was where Derek's lips were headed to next.

"Derek, please…" She moaned, her voice pleading as she felt his mouth lingering just above her swollen flesh. "Oh god, please don't make me wait too long."

"Patience, my love," he whispered, his voice hoarse as he felt his erection harden at her arousal. With each hand on her inner thighs, he gently massaged the sensitive flesh as he parted her legs and positioned himself so he could rest them on either side of his shoulders. Her hips shot off the bed when his fingers lightly grazed her soft folds, parting them as he carefully inserted one finger into her warmth. With slow purposeful strokes, he began to move in and out of her, smiling as she moaned and moved her hips against his finger. With her body writhing to his touch, he quickened his pace and unable hold back any further, he replaced his finger with his mouth and began to suck and lick her. Skillfully using his lips and tongue to part her folds, he delved deeper into her and pushed the tip of his tongue inside her, slowly moving in and out as he mimicked another intimate act.

"Oh my god, Derek!" she screamed as her hands reached out on either side of her and grabbed a fistful of the sheets. "Oh my…oh…oh my god! Please Derek…I need to feel you inside me."

Derek didn't need to be asked twice as he moved up her body and in one quick move he entered her with a long deep powerful thrust. Their eyed locked as he began to pump into her. Running her fingers up his back, Meredith let out a satisfied moan at the feel of him filling her. He continued thrusting into her, slowly at first then increasing the tempo when he felt her muscles tightening around him. Moaning his name, she arched her back off the bed to meet his demanding thrusts. Meredith's moans became louder and more urgent as the first wave of her orgasm wash over her. Her muscles tightened around him as he continued to pump into her, her body shaking at the intense spasms shooting through every part of her body. Derek felt his own orgasm start and held back from his release until her orgasm had subsided and only then did he let go as his seed filled her.


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N - As always, I loved everyone's comment, so... Thank You! **

**This update is also rated M. Enjoy!**

* * *

_Once upon a time, in a place known as Sin City_

_A boy met a girl whose beauty was as alluring as her personality is witty_

_Fate must have been looking out for him or it may have been his charm_

_For this astoundingly beautiful creature fell right into his arms_

_He asked her for her name as they sat down for a drink_

_They were like two peas in a pod, their minds and bodies in sync_

_What started out as mere flirtation soon became desire_

_For he finally met his match in a woman that he admired_

_They let their need consume them and woke to discover they're newlyweds_

_In her haste, she panicked and left to clear her head_

_As time flew by and she was gone, he knew they'd dance their last dance_

_But Fate was looking down on him and gave him one more chance_

_He moved from New York to Seattle to start his brand new life_

_It was there that he saw her again, his beautiful bride…his wife_

"That was…."

"Amazing."

"Yeah," he agreed as he collapsed onto the bed beside her, pulling her back into him as they lay spooning each other.

He brushed her hair aside to expose the soft lines of her neck and moved closer to nuzzle up against it as he planted hot kisses up and down its smooth length.

"Derek…," she sighed, unable to form a coherent thought as his kisses became more feverish.

A soft gasping moan escaped her lips as he began to do wonderful things to her body while he continued his assault on her throat and shoulders, his teeth gently nipping on her soft flesh.

"Mmm…Derek…if you don't stop…," her voice trailed off as he ran his hand down the length of her body, his fingers lightly grazing her sensitized flesh as he moved along the curve of her slim waist. "Derek, stop…" she pleaded.

"Isn't this fun?" he teased.

"For whom?" she whimpered as his hand moved further still to rest on her soft mound, his fingers dangerously close to where she was already wet and ready for him.

"For you…" he kissed her ear, his warm breath tickling her inner lobe. "For me…" his lips moved to kiss her jaw. "For h—" He didn't get to finish what he was going to say before Meredith abruptly pulled away from him as she felt his fingers tease her swollen folds.

"Where are you going?" he groaned in protested when she pulled away and stood up. Her hair was a tangled mess and her body was still glowing from the aftermath of their amazing sex and she never looked more radiant as she stood there before him.

"I want the rest of my tour," she replied, her breathing ragged from her arousal.

"But we haven't finished touring the bed yet," he husked, patting the spot she'd just vacated, hoping to tempt her into coming back. "There's plenty more to this bed we have yet to explore."

Meredith had to admit that she was tempted, but she had other things in mind. "Hmm… That offer is hard to resist, but I want to explore the rest of this trailer. I was thinking perhaps we should start with the shower."

She moved to stand beside the shower and opened the door to turn on the water, letting the jets shoot out as she peeked around the door to where Derek still laid on the bed. "Are you coming?"

Derek did not need a second invitation as he quickly leaped out of bed, nearly knocking her over as he shuffled her inside and closed the door.

"Derek! The water's freezing!" Meredith shrieked as the cold drops hit her back.

"Don't worry. Things will heat up soon," he replied, cocking his brow suggestively.

All thoughts of the freezing water were soon forgotten as Derek began to rain hot kisses from her temple, moving alongside the fine bone structure of her face, down to rest on her collarbone. His tongue darted out to flick against her soft damp skin, eliciting a gasping moan from Meredith as her head fell back in complete abandon. Derek released a deep throated groan as her movement exposed more of her heated flesh for his hungry lips to tease and nibble on. She expelled a soft sigh and opened her eyes slightly to see her breath move in small circular waves through the steam that had filled the small shower.

Things were definitely heating up and it had nothing to do with the water temperature, but rather the two heated bodies moving and gyrating against each other.

"I told you things were going to heat up soon," he teased as his fingers found her clit and began to tease it vigorously, while carefully inserting one finger inside and withdrawing it with slow purposeful strokes.

Hearing Meredith moan excited him more as he used the pad of his thumb to rub and tease her while his lips worked at coaxing her lips to part to allow his invading tongue entry to dance and mate with hers.

"You are so wet," he whispered against her mouth and deepened the kiss, while his fingers continued to tease.

"Oh god, Derek…" she moaned as her muscles began to contract around his fingers. "I'm going to…oh… OH MY GOD" She barely finished her thought as the first wave of her orgasm washed over her and instead of stopping, Derek continued to stroke and push his fingers into her to prolong her orgasm.

"You're very good at that." She gave him a devilish smile and leaned in to give him a long drugging kiss as she came down from the waves of her orgasm.

"So are you," replied Derek as he broke the kiss. "The night is not over and there are many places left to explore in this tour of ours."

Derek pulled her into his arms and moved so they stood underneath the shower to let the warm spray wash over their bodies. He reached behind her and grabbed a bar of soap off the small tray on the wall and began to run it up and down along her body, creating a thick lather of sweet smelling soap bubbles between their bodies. He moved the soap across her hardened nipples, letting his finger graze its sensitized tip before moving around and down her back to rub the soap in small circles across each butt cheek.

Just when Meredith didn't think she could take it anymore, his hand moved around to the front to her navel as he continued to lather her body. A soft excited moan escaped her lips as his fingers moved yet again, this time dangerously close to her throbbing core. Her body was still tingling from her orgasm from a few minutes ago and the thought of his fingers laying so close to her core, made her breath catch in her throat as she waited in anticipation. Instead of moving down as she had expected, his hand left her body to place the soap back in the tray. In one quick effortless move, he picked her up so she could wrap her legs around him and settled her down onto his slim toned waist.

"Derek!" Meredith shrieked in delighted surprise as she felt the tip of his hardened penis rubbing against her.

With one hand behind her back, holding her securely to him and his other palm pressed flat against the wall behind her, he maneuvered their bodies so that he could thrust into her. Meredith gazed deeply into his eyes and felt herself drowning in the blue depths as he began to push up and into her with long deep strokes.

"I love you, Meredith," his voice barely audible as he looked into her eyes.

"I love you too," she replied, her voice soft and raspy.

Upon hearing Meredith utter those words, he began to pump faster and harder into her. The soft satisfied smile that spread across her lips was all the encouragement he needed to continue to push into her.

Meredith felt sharp spasms shoot throughout her body and she felt her muscles loosen as the pleasure he was giving her intensified to an all new height. She unhooked her legs from around his waist and placed her feet flat against the wall behind his waist for support as she leaned back against the cool tiled wall. Derek gave her a wicked grin at this new position and moved his free hands down her ass to lift her up and push her down onto his thick shaft. Meredith hands reached around his neck and laced together as she held onto him for support as he continued to pound into her. In a slow painstaking movement, he withdrew himself completely from her and used the tip of his penis to tease her swollen flesh as he inserted himself half way, eliciting a gasping moan in response. Meredith had to bite down on her lips to keep from screaming her need for him as he continued to tease her by only inserting himself half way into her.

"Derek, please…" she begged, her eyes pleading as it clouded over in obvious desire. "Please give me what I want."

"And what is that, my love?"

"You. All of you!" Her breath caught in her throat as he thrust into her, filling her completely with his thick throbbing manhood.

Meredith screamed his name as her second orgasm began to build from deep within her. In her angst and pleasure, she extended her legs and simultaneously pushed herself back harder against the tiled wall while pressing her feet against the wall on the opposite end. Derek felt her muscles contract tightly around him and continued to thrust into her until he felt his own orgasm build and they both screamed each other's names as they came together.


	31. Chapter 31

"I'm hungry."

"Again?" asked Derek incredulously. "We've just had the greatest mind-blowing sex I've ever had on a dinette table and I need some time to get my energy back before we—"

"I'm not talking about that!" She slapped him on his chest, feigning annoyance at his one-track mind but her smiling eyes gave it away. "I want real food this time."

"That's what you said the last time."

"Are you complaining?"

"No. Never," he said, kissing her bare shoulder as they lay entwined in bed with her head resting in the crook of his neck. "You have an insatiable appetite and I love that."

"Is that all you love? My _appetite_?" She emphasized the last word, the distaste evident in her voice.

"When that includes me…yes," he teased.

This earned him more slaps on his chest as she tried to move off him, but Derek was quick to react and grabbed her wrists, flipping her over and pinning her to the bed with his naked body.

"Let go of me!" she demanded, her eyes challenging as she waited for him to move.

"No."

"Get off," she demanded once more through gritted teeth.

She tried to move out from underneath him but all that served to do was get him more excited.

"You're turning me on," he teased.

"Is this all I am to you?" she asked, her voice quivering slightly.

"You know you mean more to me that that," he responded, before lowering his head to plant a kiss on her lips, but she moved her head and his lips landed on her cheek instead.

"Give me your hand."

"No," she said stubbornly.

"Meredith."

"No!"

"Do you want to know how much you mean to me?"

She nodded her head, unable to speak.

"Good. Now give me your hand."

She unfurled her fingers from the bedsheet that she had been gripping onto and placed her smaller hand into his. He shifted their position so they lay on their side, facing each other. Derek moved her hand up over his chest, his big hand covering hers.

"Do you feel that?"

She nodded her head once more as she gazed, mesmerized, into the blue depths of his eyes.

"That is my heart beating for you and only you." The love in his eyes reached into her very soul. "You, Meredith Grey, mean everything to me. Don't ever doubt that." He moved one strong hand up to cup her face as he leaned in and gave her a long drugging kiss. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"C'mon, let's go eat so we can get to the dessert."

Meredith let out a playful giggle at the wicked grin he gave her and allowed herself to be pulled out of bed. The sounds of their laughter echoed through the trailer.

* * *

"Mmm…yummy." Meredith closed her eyes momentarily in sweet delight as she took a spoonful of strawberry ice cream into her mouth. "Want some?"

She scooped another spoonful and held it to his mouth as she tried not to laugh at the scowl on his face.

"You know, when I said dessert, this was _not_ what I had in mind," he sulked.

"Aw…my poor, sex-deprived husband," she teased before licking the spoon dry. "I'm giving you time to rest, like you asked."

"I'm well rested now. C'mon, Mer…please," he begged as he ran his hands up and down the length of her smooth thighs.

Meredith was sitting on top of him, her legs straddling his hips as she sat eating the ice cream, wearing nothing but his shirt. Her hair fell in soft curls around her flushed cheeks as she made soft satisfied moans with each spoonful of ice cream. This display of obvious pleasure from the sweet dessert made Derek more aroused as his throbbing penis strained against the thin fabric of his boxer shorts. Meredith let out a soft giggle as she felt his penis pushing up against her core and her hips began to move involuntarily in small circles, eliciting an agonized moan from deep within Derek's throat.

"Jesus, Mer…you're killing me."

"Not yet," she teased. "I kind of like having you around."

Derek moved his hands further up her legs, around the back to cup her bare buttocks as he gave each cheek a hard squeeze. Meredith had to admit that she was beyond aroused, but she didn't want to give in…not yet anyways. She lost interest in the ice cream five bites ago and now she was only eating cold dessert to cool her flushed body down. She knew she should have climbed down off him, but she liked how his warm body felt pushing up against hers. The feel of his strong hands moving assuredly all over her body, sent tingling waves of pleasure all throughout.

"I'm around and I'm aroused." He began to unbutton her shirt, but she slapped it away and moved to place ice cream carton and spoon on the nightstand.

"Derek?"

"Yes," he moaned as he pushed up into her.

"I want to get to know you."

"Mmmm…you already know me so well," he answered, his voice strained.

"No, I mean I want to know you and your family. Your likes and dislikes. If we're going to make this marriage work, I need to know what makes you tick."

"I'll tell you anything you want to know, just please don't make me wait too long."

"Tell me about your family."

"Now is _really_ not the time to be talking about my family."

"Tell me or I'm getting off!"

"Fine," he agreed, holding her hips still to prevent her from moving.

"My parents, Michael and Kate, are happily retired and live in Long Island. I have four annoyingly girly sisters and more nieces and nephews than I care remember."

"What's your favorite hobby? Favorite ice cream? Favorite band? Favorite movie?"

"My favorite hobby was fly fishing, but I think I like having sex with my wife better."

"Having sex with me is a hobby?"

"Correction…it's more like an addiction."

"Much better."

"Favorite ice cream is coffee, although strawberry is fast becoming my new favorite."

Meredith smiled at his answer and sat waiting for him to continue.

"Favorite band…The Clash," he answered after thinking about that for a second.

"Favorite movie…Tequila Sunrise."

"Let me guess, you're a fan of Michelle Pfeiffer."

"She's hot!" he exclaimed. "But she pales in comparison to you."

"Good answer."

"Is there anything else you want to know?"

Meredith nibbled on her lower lip, pretending to think long and hard before asking "Favorite sexual position?"

"The "bendy" thing," he answered without thinking about it.

"Bendy thing, it is."

With that, she lowered herself down and gave him a long drugging kiss before sitting back up to dispense of her clothes.


	32. Chapter 32

**Thank you for reading this fic and your wonderful comments!**

* * *

Meredith was running late again. She knew Bailey would have her ass for being late two days in a row, but she didn't care. She just spent the last few hours in Derek's arms, making passionate love and her body was sore from all the new positions they tried last night, but she was happy and completely sated. Today was a good day and nothing was going to ruin it for her, not even Bailey's wrath.

"Good morning, beautiful."

Meredith didn't need to turn around to know who that voice belong to. She was familiar with that deep voice, especially when he is in the throes of a red-hot orgasm.

"Hi." She turned to smile up at him when he fell into step beside her.

She jumped when he snaked an arm around her waist and pulled her in for a deep kiss.

"Derek!" she shrieked as she tried to wrestle out of his arms. "Stop that! People are looking."

"Let them look. I miss my wife and want to give her a kiss. What's the harm in that?"

"We've done enough kissing last night AND this morning!"

"I like the kissing. More kissing, I say."

"I like the kissing too, but not at work. At work, we're Dr. Grey and Dr. Shepherd. Off work, we can be whatever you want."

"Really?" he asked, his eyes widening in excitement like a child lost in a candy store. "Oohh…the possibilities."

"You're sex-craved!"

"You've woken the beast and he wants more."

"Tell the beast to go into hibernation because I have a long day ahead of me," she checked her watch and cursed. "Shit! Now I'm REALLY late!"

"If you'd let me drive you to work instead of insisting I drop you at home first, you wouldn't be late."

"I needed a change of clothes after you dragged me into the shower, fully dressed." She looked at him accusingly, but her cheeks flushed at the memory of the sex they shared under the hot spray of the water. "Bailey's going to make me do SCUT again today. I just know it."

"Want me to talk to her?"

"And say what? "Please excuse Dr. Grey for being late. She was up all night having sex and overslept?" I don't think she's going to buy that."

"I can be very charming when I want to be, you know?"

"Yes, I DO know. That's what got me into this mess in the first place."

"Mess? You think this is a mess?"

"I…I don't know what I think! I'm late and I need to change."

"Tell me you love me."

"What?" she asked, wondering where that came from.

"Tell me you love me," he repeated his voice more firm.

"You know I do."

"I want to hear you say it. Here. In front of other people."

"Wasn't the omission yesterday in front of the ENTIRE hospital staff enough?"

"Stop stalling, Mer. I just want to hear you say it, okay?"

She looked at him straight in the eyes and let out a frustrated sigh before saying "I love you, you big oaf! Are you happy now?"

"Extremely," he said with a pleasing smile. He gave her a light pat on her butt and said "Now get going before Bailey comes looking for you."

"Aren't you running late too?" she asked as she began walking backwards through the front lobby.

"Yes, but I don't have Bailey to answer to so I can take my sweet time"

He gave her a sheepish grin and nodded his head in amusement when she made a face and stuck her tongue at him before running into one of the elevators. He felt his phone vibrating in his coat pocket and reaching inside, he pulled it out. The smile on his lips fell when he saw the number on the display. He flipped the phone open and turned it off before slipping it back into his coat pocket.

* * *

"You're late, Grey!" Bailey barked, not bothering to turn around to know that it was Meredith running to catch up with them.

"How does she do that?" Meredith whispered to Cristina as she worked at tying her hair up into a loose ponytail.

"She's got eyes behind her head," replied Cristina as she looked at Bailey's head, almost expecting to see a pair of eyes popping out.

"Seriously."

"How did your date with McDreamy go last night?"

"Amazing. He gave me a private tour of his home. We explored every nook and cranny."

"That sounds dirty."

"It was."

"You woke the beast?"

"Oh yeah…," she answered with a devilish grin on her face.

"Grey!" Bailey bellowed her name as she turned to give Meredith a death glare. "Your new husband may be my boss, but don't for one second, think that that will get you any special privileges with me. You are MY intern and I expect you to be on time every morning for rounds, do ya hear?"

"Yes, Dr. Bailey."

"Good. Just so you don't forget, you will be on SCUT today. Maybe a few rectal exams will teach you not to be a pain in my ass and show up when you are expected to show up."

"Yes, Dr. Bailey."

"What are you still doing here? Go!"

* * *

It was the afternoon before Meredith finally had some breathing room. She had performed over a dozen rectal exams, 15 stitches, had a little four year old girl throw up on her while she was checking her reflexes, and had to fight off the advances of an overweight middle-aged man with severe intestinal problems. She was exhausted and in no mood for company which is why she was slouched over a small table in the far corner of the lunch area with her head buried in her arms.

"Are you okay?"

"im esaused." She mumbled, her head still buried in her arms.

"You're what?"

"im esaused…toomanybutts…lilboogerhurled…feldupbyhornymanwhocantpoo…ugh!"

"Meredith, honey, I can't understand a word you're saying."

"no…n…g."

"No what?"

"No energy!" She lifted her head long enough to yell at him before letting her head plop back down onto her arms.

Derek gave up trying to talk to the top of her head and came to squat down next to her. He poked his head underneath her arms so he could see her face.

"Do you want to lie down in my office?"

"Can't"

"Why not?"

"Bailey."

"Forget Bailey. You can barely stand— What's that smell?" He wrinkled his nose at the foul smell that wafted past his nose and slowly eyed Meredith wondering if the smell was coming from her. "Are you…?"

"It's me! That hideous smell is coming from me!" She sat upright and stared at him. She looked defeated with her shoulders slumped and her eyes were weary. "A little girl threw up on me when I was trying to examine her and a big overly amorous man tried to feel me up as I was taking his vitals. I had to do 14 rectal exams…FOURTEEN! Aside from the fact that I can no longer look at food the same way again, I can barely feel my fingers from all the stitching and poking…and…and I know when I go back, there will be more waiting for me. The nurses and Bailey hate me."

"They don't hate you."

'Yes they do, Derek. They're jealous because I'm married to you," she stated matter-of-factly. "Well, Bailey isn't jealous. She just hates me period. I think she gets a high from torturing us interns."

Derek had to laugh at her last comment. He hasn't known Bailey for long, but he knows that she's tough because she wants them to succeed. He had his own Nazi resident when was doing his internship and understand that they're tough on purpose so they can weed out the weak ones. He knows his Meredith is not weak and he has every confidence that she will pass her first year with flying colors and go on to become a brilliant surgeon.

"You're going to survive this."

"I know. I'm a survivor. If there's one thing my mother taught me, it's to survive. I have to— Are you going to answer that?"

"What?"

"Your pocket is ringing."

"Oh." He already knew who it was calling, but he reached inside and pulled the phone out to look at the number on the display.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" she asked when it appeared that he wasn't going to answer it.

"No. I'll let it go into voicemail."

"What if it's an important call?"

"It can wait. You can't."

"I'm fine, Derek. You don't need to fuss over me like I'm a child."

"When I see you slouched over a table, I tend to worry."

"You needn't worry about me either."

"I worry about you because I love you. Deal with it."

Meredith gave him a weak smile and leaned over to give him a deep lingering kiss.

"I thought we aren't supposed to show any PDA at the hospital."

"I love you and I want to kiss you. Deal with it."

"So kissing is allowed? How about we meet in the on-call room later to, you know…kiss some more?"

"Don't push your luck. I have to go, but I'll meet you tonight at Joe's."

"Okay." Derek smiled as he watched her run off. He let out a frustrated sigh when he heard his phone ringing and instead of letting the call go into voicemail, he reached for the phone and answered the call.

"Hi," he said into the phone. "No, I'm not avoiding your calls. I've been busy, that's all."


	33. Chapter 33

**I apologize for taking so long to update this fic. I've been working on a new PD/EP fic and it pretty much consumed most of my free time. Thank you for all the wonderful comments! **

* * *

Derek let out a long sigh of relief as he exited the OR room. The usual rush of adrenaline he gets before each surgery failed him today as he found himself anxious for it to be over. Being the consummate professional, he made sure each incision was precise; each and every dead cancer cell carefully extracted with meticulous precision, but his heart and mind was just not in it.

His thoughts kept straying to the phone call earlier in the day. He knew he should've let the call go into voicemail, but he also knew this person would not be deterred from getting a hold of him, even if that meant getting onto a plane and flying halfway across the country to deliver a simple message.

Ever since his divorce, the calls were more frequent, especially when he moved to Seattle. At first he didn't mind it so much, but now things were different.

After putting his lab coat back on, he went through the motions of informing the patient's family that the operation went well and the patient was expected to have a full recovery, barring any complications from the surgery.

He was leaning against the nurse's desk jotting some notes into the patient's file when the now familiar ring tone of his phone stopped his writing in mid-sentence. He mentally counted the number of rings, knowing that it would soon go into voicemail and sure enough the ringing stopped on the fourth ring. He turned his attention back to the file and continued writing when the blasted phone began ringing again.

"Shit!" he hissed, prompting a few of the nurses to look at him oddly.

He gave them a friendly smile and continued to write, all the while counting the rings. One…two…

"Aren't you going to answer that?" asked a voice from behind.

He slowly turned to see Dani staring at him, her eyebrow raised as she glanced to his right pocket and back up at him once more.

"Nope," he answered brusquely as he inserted the file back onto the shelf and began to walk away.

"What if it's important?" she asked, falling into step beside him.

"It's not."

"What if it is?"

"It's not!" he snapped, turning to eye her carefully as he rounded a corner.

"You're avoiding something."

"Why are you following me?" he asked, annoyed.

"I want to know who you're running from."

"Do you want to know? Do you REALLY want to know?" he barked. He stopped so abruptly, she collided into his chest, nearly knocking the wind out of her. "You. That's who I'm running from."

With that, he turned on his heel and walked in the opposite direction they came from.

"You're going to have to tell her eventually, you know?" she yelled after his retreating back.

Derek was in mid-stride when he stopped and turned to glare at her. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"The phone call," she said smugly. "I know all about it and she needs to know."

"No, she doesn't," he said, his voice terse. "It's too early for her. For us. We just got back together and I don't want to scare her away."

"You're not giving her enough credit, Derek. She may seem small and fragile, but she's tough and I know she can handle it."

"She's never had much of a family growing up and I don't want to overwhelm her with too much this early on in our relationship."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Not go."

"Yeah. Good luck with that one."

"How do you know about this anyway?"

"I got a phone call. Several, to be exact. She knew I was out here doing a consult and since she couldn't get a hold of you, she called me."

"Sorry," he apologized, feeling bad that she had to get involved.

"Tell her. You know you can't get out of this and deep down, I think you want to go."

"But—"

"She's going to find out eventually. Tell her before she opens the door one day to find her mother-in-law standing there."

* * *

Meredith's exhaustion had reached an all-time high by the time her numb legs carried her back to the locker room. Instead of going to change and get ready for Joe's, she slowly dragged herself across the length of the bench and laid down with her head tucked into her arms. She let her heavy-lidded eyes fall shut and she wasn't sure how long she had been out when she felt something tickle the nape of her neck. With her eyes still closed, she pulled an arm out from underneath her face and waved it aimlessly in the air as if to swat at a fly. Satisfied that she had gotten rid of the nuisance, her arm returned to its previous spot and she let out a soft yawn with every intention of returning to sleep.

A few seconds later, she felt the tickle again accept this time it was accompanied by a warm breath that sent an electric tingle down her spine. She smiled deeply and slowly opened her eyes to look straight into a pair of baby blues.

"Hi," she said her voice still groggy from sleep.

"Hi."

"When did you get here?"

"Fifteen minutes ago."

"Fifteen minutes!" she gasped, sitting straight up. "Why didn't you wake me?"

"You looked so peaceful; I didn't have the heart to. Besides, I like watching you sleep."

"You watched me last night AND this morning. Are you some kind of sicko that likes to watch people sleep?"

"I only have eyes for you."

She blushed deeply at his response and leaned in to give him a lingering kiss, their tongues mating as they explored and delved deeper. Their breathing was ragged, and their cheeks were flushed with desire when they finally broke the kiss. "Let me change and we can walk over to Joe's"

There was a long pause before Derek spoke. "Why don't we skip Joe's tonight and you and I spend a quiet evening at home."

"But I promised Cristina and Izzie…,"

"They'll understand. Please?"

Meredith opened her mouth to protest, but her heart melted when she looked into his pleading eyes. "Your place or mine?" she finally asked with a resigned sigh.

"Yours. The only knowledge I have of your home is the front porch where I dropped you off on our first date. I think it's rather appropriate for a husband to know how his wife lives. Are you a slob or a neat freak?" he teased.

"You will soon find out." She grimaced when she opened her locker and half of its contents spilled out onto the floor. Her clothes lay in an unfolded heap on top of her oversized bag.

"I think I already know the answer," he said dryly.

"Shut up," she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Why don't I get a head start," he suggested, getting up from the bench. "I need to go home and pack an overnight bag first, then pick up dinner on my way over."

* * *

Meredith was getting anxious as she checked herself in the mirror for the umpteenth time ever since she got home and jumped in the shower. She called Cristina to tell her that she wouldn't be able to make it and after letting her friend rant for a good ten minutes, she explained that Derek wanted to spend some time alone together. This explanation earned her another ten minutes of cursing and yelling, until Cristina ran out of breath and said the sex had better be good for her to ditch her friends. If she only knew what that man can do, she thought wickedly to herself.

She was getting aroused as she recalled all the positions they tried at his trailer. She's always known that she was flexible, thanks to yoga and Pilates, but the bendy and twisty things really put her muscles to the test. She'd have to remember to call her old college friend, Angie, and thank her for telling her about the twisty thing. Her cheeks turned a deep crimson red as she recalled the way Derek filled her to the hilt and gave her one of the most intense orgasm she's ever felt.

Deciding against the t-shirt and yoga pants she threw on after her shower, she quickly undressed and rummaged through her closet until she found what she was looking for – a powder blue silk chemise with a lace trimmed bodice that came down mid-thigh. She slipped it on her lithe body and returned to the mirror to see how she looked, and more importantly, to see what Derek would see when she greeted him at the door.

Meredith was never one who liked to fuss over her looks or dress to impress any guy, but today, all her thoughts were on Derek and her need to make herself desirable just for him. She let her eyes sweep her full length as she took in the way her golden hair lay in soft curls around her slim shoulders. Her cheeks were slightly rosy from the shower as well as those wicked thoughts of their tryst at his place the night before. She thought of applying a light coat of gloss on her lips, but decided to leave it alone with its naturally soft pink coloring. Derek had told her over and over again how much he loved her natural beauty and she didn't want to disappoint him tonight. She could see the soft outline of her nipples at they jutted against the silky fabric. The chemise framed her body perfectly as her eyes trailed further down to see that her body was glowing.

_Where is he?_

Just then, she heard a car drive up and ran over to the window to see him pull his car into the driveway. She felt her pulse quicken as she watched him get out of the car and go around the back to pull several bags from the trunk. Her eyes watched as his shirt stretched over the taut muscles of his back and broad shoulders. Unable to be away from him any longer, she walked out of her room and down the stairs, her steps brisk as she tried to reign in her excitement.

She threw the door open just as Derek was about to ring the doorbell. A big smile spread across her face as she saw his jaw drop when he saw her.

"Wow," he breathed, as his eyes made an appreciative sweep up and down her body.


	34. Chapter 34

**Thank you so much for all the wonderful comments!**

* * *

Meredith was secretly excited to see that she was able to evoke such a heady response from him. She struggled to keep a straight face as her eyes swept over his entire length, taking in his toned physique as the dark green shirt lay against the muscled wall of his chest. Her eyes continued to survey him as they trailed past his slim waist, stopping at the crotch of his jeans to take notice of the large bulge straining against the fabric.

"Hmm…," she inhaled deeply. "Something smells delicious. What's for dinner?"

She stepped aside to let him through and let her eyes wander down to his firm buttocks as he bent to put the bags onto the floor.

"Forget dinner." He turned and let his eyes devour her in her skimpy attire as his gaze fell on the soft outline of her nipples. "Let's go straight to the dessert," he suggested, his voice laced with sexual need.

"But I'm hungry," she whined.

"Me too." He made a low growl deep in his throat before reaching out to pull her into his tight embrace.

He dipped his head to hers and their lips collided in a heated kiss. Derek's lips were soft and pliant as they teased and coaxed, intoxicating her senses. On a soft sigh, she gave in to the demand and parted her lips to allow his to delve deeper as it searched for her tongue. The kiss deepened as they fought for control, each seeking and exploring as their tongues and lips moved in an erotic dance of foreplay.

Meredith was left gasping for breath when they finally broke from the kiss. Derek smiled at her wickedly as he dipped his head to the smooth lines of her throat and began to nuzzle on the soft flesh. His hand moved down her back and cupped her pert bottom, giving it a light squeeze.

"Derek…," she moaned when his hardened penis rubbed against her stomach. The feel of the wisp of silk gliding across her heated skin sent an electrifying shudder down her spine.

"God, Meredith…you have no idea what you're doing to me."

She knew. She knew very well because she was feeling the same way. She was tempted to dispense with dinner and let herself succumb to the feverish desire that they both desperately needed to have assuaged. She could very well have her way with him in the foyer and Derek wouldn't protest one bit, but she wanted tonight to be special and if that meant having to wait, then so be it.

With strength she didn't know she had, she pushed him away. The sudden move caused Derek's body to falter slightly as he took a step back to keep from falling.

"I DO know," she admitted, "and I want the same thing, but we have all night and I want it to be special. Our relationship didn't exactly go through the normal dating, courtship thing and I want us to talk and learn about each other. I kinda like you," she said, grinning sheepishly, "and I like having you around."

As much as it pained Derek - literally, given the large bulge still straining against his pants, he had to agree that they need to talk.

"I like you too," he responded in kind. "And I like having you around as well."

The smile that graced her face tugged deeply at his heart strings. Extending his hand out to hers, he said "C'mon my beautiful vixen. Let's go inside."

* * *

Dinner was rather eventful as they tried to feed themselves through fits of laughter at their clumsiness while they struggled to manipulate two small wooden sticks between their fingers.

"Why aren't we using forks again?" Derek asked, as he tried with all his might to keep the noodle from slipping between the chopsticks.

"Because Chinese food is meant to be eaten with chopsticks," Meredith explained as she carefully brought the chopsticks that was carrying three grains of rice to her lips.

"The key word here is 'eat' which neither of us have had much success doing."

"I did it!" she exclaimed cheerily when she managed to get the rice into her mouth.

"Good. Now you can feed me."

"Nah-uh. To each their own, my love."

They were sitting on the loveseat in her living room, each holding a take-out box in one hand with chopsticks on the other. The lights were dimmed low as the flames from the fireplace Derek lit gave off a warm illuminating glow. The setting was intimate with Derek sitting in the middle of the loveseat and Meredith leaning back against one armrest with her legs propped up over his thighs.

"I can do this," Derek said, his voice determined. "I'm a surgeon. If I can do a running whip stitch with my eyes closed, I can certainly use this contraption to pick up a noodle."

He dug into the box, swirled the chopsticks around a few times and pulled out the biggest ball of noodle Meredith's ever seen.

"Oh my god!" she shrieked. "You're going to choke on that."

"No, I won't. Watch." He carefully inserted the food into his mouth and made a big, goofy grin as he chewed and swallowed the food, ending it with a satisfied moan.

"You're a goof," she smiled, returning to her own box to try to grab a broccoli.

"Yes, but I'm a well-fed goof," he teased as he inserted a second ball of noodle into his mouth.

They continued to eat in silence.

"Mer?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"You just did."

"Very funny." He reached across to lightly pinch the bridge of her nose which earned him a small slap on his hand as she stuck her tongue out at him.

"What do you want to ask me?

"When I first got here in Seattle, you mentioned something about a note. What note were you talking about?"

"A note?" she repeated, feigning ignorance to buy herself some time. She thought he had forgotten about it, but apparently not.

"Yes. You said something about me choosing to ignore the note. Did I miss something?"

Taking a deep breath, she put her food down and used the napkin to wipe her hand and mouth before discarding that onto the coffee table. Derek watched her slight change in mood and followed her actions before he leaned back and looked at her, his eyes imploring.

"Do you remember when I left that morning?" she asked, her voice tentative.

"How could I forget."

"When I left, I had every intention of going back home and forgetting about you and the night we shared."

She felt a vice tighten around her heart when she saw a pained look flash across his face at her confession. "Let's talk about something else."

"No," he said firmly. "I want to know why you wanted to forget me. I NEED to know."

"Derek," she whispered, her eyes silently pleading. "It was a long time ago…and you and I…we're at a good place now. Why do you want to talk about something that is well in the past?"

"Meredith," he reached out to cup her face, his thumb gently stroking her cheek. "This thing between us is real and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of our lives together. I want to get to know you…to learn and grow with you. In order for us to do that, we need to be able to talk and tell each other things…even though it may be hurtful." He paused to take a deep breath and wipe a stray tear from her cheek. "Please talk to me."

Meredith was taken aback by his words. Aside from her closest friends, Cristina and Izzie, she's never had anyone who's taken an interest in knowing who she really is. Even her own mother, whom she attributes her dark and twisty behaviors, never bothered to get to know her. She knew her mother regretted having her. She was a big mistake in another equally big mistake when she married her father, Thatcher. Thinking about her father brought a bitter taste to her mouth. The hatred Meredith felt for her mother paled in comparison to the loathing and disgust she feels for the man who abandoned her when she was five years old.

"Mer?"

She snapped out of her thoughts and looked at him. "I'm dark and twisty, Derek. I'm damaged goods. People say they want to get to know me, but once the effects of alcohol wears off, they go running in the other direction."

"How can you say that when I'm sitting here next to you?" he asked. "The last I checked, water does not have any alcohol content in it. I am very well aware of who I'm with and what I want. You, Meredith, you're what I want. I hope you believe me."

"I do. It's just that I didn't know it back then," she quickly explained. "When I saw you that first night, I felt this…," she struggled to find the word, "…this strong connection to you and it frightened me. That night at the bar was the first time I had opened up to anyone, besides Cristina and Izzie, about my life. I don't know why I did it, but you…you had this way about you that made me feel good about myself and I hadn't felt that way for a very, very long time."

"I'm so sorry, Mer." He moved closer and pulled her into his arms as he gave her a soft kiss on her lips. "I didn't mean to bring up old wounds from the past."

"I know. To be honest, I'm glad that you brought it up. I mean, you and I, we have a lot to learn of each other. We're married. We should be able to talk and tell each other everything. Growing up, my life was filled with nothing but lies and secrets and I want it all to stop. I'm an adult and I should start acting like one."

"I'm proud of you, you know that?"

"I do now."

Together, they sat in comfortable silence watching the fireplace as Derek absently ran his fingers through her hair, playing with the ends as they slipped through his fingers. He loved being with her like this. Ever since his divorce, he never imagined he would ever feel complete or whole again. But that was exactly how he felt sitting there with Meredith in his arms.

"Mer?"

"Hmm?"

"There's something I need to tell you."

"Okay."

"It's about the phone calls I've been getting."

Lifting her head from his shoulder, she looked at him, her eyes searching as she waited.

"Remember when I told you about my parents and that they've been married for forty years?"

"Yeah," she said tentatively, unsure of where this was going.

"Well, their anniversary is coming up in a few weeks and—"

"Oh!" she said, releasing the breath she had been holding. "I thought you were going to tell me something bad."

"Well…"

"What is it, Derek?"

"Every year, my sisters throw a big anniversary party for my parents at their house in Long Island and…," he trailed off to take a deep breath as he continued, "my mom's been calling me lately because she…"

"The thing is…last year I didn't go because Addison and I were having major problems in our marriage and I didn't think it was right to go because I didn't want to ruin their happy celebration. I lied to them and used work as an excuse, but in reality, I could've moved my schedule around if I wanted to. Anyways, when my mom called, I felt bad for missing her party last year and sort of…kind of…committed to going and I may have told—"

"Oh! Is that all?" she asked, laughing at the nervous look on his face. "You should go, Derek. I'm sure your family misses you a lot and you should go see them. A fortieth anniversary is huge and you shouldn't miss it."

"But you—"

"Silly man. I'll be fine without you for a couple of days. I'm sure I can find lots of things to do with Izzie and Cris—"

"Wait, Mer," he interrupted. "You didn't let me finish what I was going to say. The thing is, when I talked to my mom, I sort of told her that we would be coming."

"You told them WHAT?" she yelled, pulling further away from him.

"I told my mother I was bringing you. My wife."

"Wha—why?! Why did you tell them that? WHY?" she demanded when she found her voice again.

"Please don't be upset with me," he pleaded. "It's just that when I talked to her, she was really worried and I hadn't talked to her for so long that I felt guilty. She thought I was going to say I couldn't come and began to cry and…you know how I get when the women I love cry and…pretty soon I found myself promising to come no matter what and somehow…somehow it slipped that I was married and as soon as she found out, she gave me an earful for keeping you a secret and made me promise to bring you along, so…"

"-----"

"Please don't be mad at me. I know I should've talked this over with you first, but she really had me cornered and I…oh my god, I'm SO sorry."

"-----"

"Please forgive me. Please…say something."

"You're an ass."

Derek hung his head as he prepared himself for a long lonely night because the cold stoney look on her face pretty much told him what he feared. He was going to have to call his mother first thing tomorrow and fix what he had royally messed up.

"I'm sorry. I'll call her tomorrow and tell her we can't go."

"You will do no such thing."

"But…"

"While I don't agree that you made the promise to your mother BEFORE talking to me, I don't want you to break her heart by not coming."

"What are you saying?" he asked his voice hopeful.

"I'm saying that I'll go with you, you ass."


	35. Chapter 35

**Thank you for the wonderful comments. **

* * *

"I'm saying that I'll go with you, you ass."

"You will?" he asked, his eyes beaming at the good news.

"Yes, but don't think you're off the hook just yet. You owe me and you owe me…BIG."

"Anything you want. I'll do whatever you want. Just name it," he said, pulling her back into his arms as he rained tender kisses all over her lips and face. "What do you want? A foot massage? A back rub? A car?"

Meredith was giddy from his silliness as well as his eagerness to make her happy. "I don't need a car, silly."

She pulled her legs off his and moved around him so she sat straddling him on the couch. With her legs pulled up on either side of his hips and her hands holding onto the back of the couch on either side of his head, she leaned in and whispered, "No secrets. I want no more secrets between us."

She kissed his lobe and blew softly into his ear, eliciting a long anguished sigh in response as his penis hardened and became fully aroused. He let out a deep guttural moan at the feel of her warm body pressed up against his while her hips undulated in soft erotic movements against his hard, aching groin. He looked down to see that her panties were damp as they rubbed against him, her juices dripping out onto his pants.

"Jesus Mer. You're so sexy, I'm hard just looking at you."

"Promise me there will be no more secrets between us." She swept her lips lightly across his and stopped short of fully kissing him.

"I promise." Their warm breaths mingled together as their lips touched and teased lightly. "God Mer, I want you so badly. Please…," he begged, his need and arousal evident in his hoarse voice, "please…I need to be inside you…NOW."

"I'm not done telling you what I want," she softly reprimanded him before pulling away as he moved his lips closer to seek entrance into her warmth.

"What do you want, baby? Tell me and I'll give it to you."

She reached up and slid the thin spaghetti strap of her chemise off her shoulder and said, "I want you to kiss me here."

Derek willingly obliged as he pressed his lips to her bare shoulder and began to kiss the soft creamy flesh.

"And here," she directed, pointing to her collarbone.

Always ready to appease her, Derek moved his lips to trail hot, searing kisses from her shoulder to her collarbone. Instead of stopping to wait for her next command, he continued on his path until his lips came to rest between the valley of her breasts.

"Oh my god…," she moaned when he took an aching nipple into his mouth and began to suckle on the hardened peak.

"Do you like this?"

"Yes…god yes," she replied, her whimper a mixture of anguish and pleasure as he tugged and laved her swollen peak.

Meredith felt the rush of blood return to her arms and fingers as she released the tight grip she had on the couch to run her fingers through his hair. Her nails scratched and her fingers tugged as she massaged his scalp, leaving his hair a disheveled mess atop his handsome face. She released a soft gasping sigh when the sensitized flesh of her inner thighs rubbed up against his shirt. To gain better access to her supple breasts, Derek leaned forward as he gently pushed her back, her soft and pliant body arching to his satisfaction. He continued his gentle assault on her breasts until he heard her cry out his name, begging for release.

Barely able to muster enough strength to move her legs, she pushed her body down his long legs so her hands could work at unbuttoning his shirt. Only when his shirt lay completely open to her adoring gaze did she allow her fingers to move down the muscled wall of his chest to his belt. Her fingers deftly undid his belt and the top button and zip of his jeans in a matter of seconds.

Meredith was on a whole new level of sexual awareness as her eyes traveled up his lean torso, her hungry gaze taking in every inch of his exposed body.

"Oh, Meredith…oh my god. I love your mouth." His moan was barely audible, but the vibrations that reverberated through his chest peaked her excitement as she kissed and captured a nipple into her mouth. Her lips teased and nipped on the hard bud until she released it to move to the crook of his neck where she blew hot, wet kisses and licked the taut muscled cords of his throat.

With her legs still straddling him, he lifted his hips off the couch and worked at carefully removing his jeans and boxer briefs. Meredith let out a shocked giggle as her body teetered on his legs and Derek put his hand on her lower back to steady her while he finished undressing and kicked his pants to the floor.

Their lips crashed together in an all-consuming kiss as Meredith moaned at the feel of his throbbing penis pushing up against the wet fabric of her soaking panties, demanding entry. Meredith opened her eyes to see him looking straight at her. They continued to kiss and explore each other with long drugging kisses, their mouths fused together as their tongues dueled and fought for control.

With a sexy, wicked glint in her eyes she moved off him, being careful not to break their kiss as her hands deftly pulled at her panties, letting them fall to the floor. Deepening the kiss, she moved her lithe body to straddle him once more, her legs opening wide to accommodate his body between hers. Her eyes widened in pleasured excitement at the feel of his engorged tip rubbing at the entrance of her swollen lips.

Her breathing was ragged as she moaned into his mouth, "I want you inside me. I want to see your eyes darken as I take all of you in."

Derek nearly lost it as she slipped her tongue inside his mouth to seek and play with his. His throbbing penis ached as it moved across her wet folds in long sweeping motions. Just when they didn't think they could handle the anticipation, he lifted his hips off the couch and thrust into her, plunging hard and deep into her slick center.

"Oh shit!" she screamed when he filled her completely. "Oh my god…"

Her moans echoed throughout the room as he pumped into her, hard and fast. "Is this how you want it? Tell me, my beautiful vixen. Tell me how you want it," he coaxed, pushing her body down onto his thick penis as he thrust up simultaneously.

"Yes…yes…YES!" she screamed as her muscles stretched deliciously around him, his tip pushing up against her g-spot with each long, deep stroke. "Just like that, baby…..Mmm…oh my…shit! Fuck me harder, Derek! Harder!"

Meredith was lost in complete rapture as her senses took over and she moaned and writhed against him. The chemise slipped lower onto her body as her breasts jutted and moved with each driving force. Derek exhaled a deep growl from within his throat at the sight of her bare luscious body moving up and down his thick shaft. His eyes fell onto the soft spot at the base of her neck which he knew she was very sensitive to and he reached out to tug her hair lightly as he brought her to his lips. His teeth nipped the spot tentatively at first and then became more urgent and demanding as her muscles contracted around him. Her movements were feverish as she met each upward thrust with her own powerful downward move.

Their bodies moved in perfect unison, their cries echoed through the halls as they continued to please and give each other pleasure. The red-orange hue from the fireplace provided a soft illuminating glow as it fell in a soft swathe across their sweat-slicked bodies.

"Oh my god, Derek! I'm cumming, baby…I'm cumming!" she screamed, her body convulsing in pleasurable spasms as her orgasm rippled through her body in waves.

Her body collapsed onto his and she bit his shoulder hard as he spilled into her.

"I'm hungry again," he said as he moved their still connected bodies onto the floor in front of the fireplace.

"Me too," she moaned when she felt his penis hardened inside her.


	36. Chapter 36

**I apologize for taking so long to update. Thank you for the wonderful comments and for being so patient.**

* * *

Sleep was eluding Meredith as she laid awake in bed long after Derek had fallen asleep while spooning her. Her fingers absently ran up and down the length of his forearm as he hugged her close with a possessive arm draped across her slim waist. 

She was conflicted and she couldn't get herself to fall asleep. She had no idea what prompted her to agree to accompany him to his parent's anniversary celebration, other than to blame it on the lack of oxygen to her brain at the time. Her breath had caught in her throat at the way his piercing baby blues silently pleaded with her and she was lost. If her brain had been fully functional at the time, she was sure she would've come up with many good reasons not to go.

She thought of trying to talk her way out of it, but after several rounds of amazing sex in front of the fireplace, in the shower, and then on her bed, she was too exhausted to think straight. Afterwards as they lay in bed, he had been so happy that she didn't have the heart to disappoint him. She vowed she'd talk to him about it tomorrow. That's it. She'll do it tomorrow…

* * *

Meredith was sitting in really old guy's room reading…or rather hiding behind a magazine when Cristina breezed into the room, carrying her lunch tray. 

"So this is where you're hiding today." Cristina stated matter-of-factly, eyeing her friend as she dropped her tray onto the bed and sat down.

"I'm not hiding. I'm keeping old guy company," she lied. From the corner of her eyes, she could see the doubtful look on her friend's face and let out a defeated sigh before confessing. "I'm hiding."

"Why don't you just tell him that you don't want to go?"

"I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Because!" snapped Meredith. She gave Cristina a glare in response to the smug look on her face. "He's excited about the trip. That's all he talks about when we're at home. I've tried to tell him many times, but every time I open my mouth, I get nervous and we end up having sex instead."

"Am I supposed to feel bad for you? Because I don't."

"I'm serious!"

"So am I! Do you know how long it's been since I've had sex?"

"What am I going to do, Cristina? I am scared shitless at the thought of meeting his parents and I'm terrified to tell Derek. I don't do well with parents. We're like oil and water. We just don't mix. Look at my mother! I need to tell him. I SHOULD tell him….I can't tell him. You tell him. Yeah…that's it…you tell him that I can't go," she ranted like a madwoman on a mission. "Oh my god, he's going to think I'm crazy. Maybe…I should let him THINK I'm crazy, then he won't want me to go…and I'll be off the hook. What do you think?"

"I think he's gonna want to divorce your neurotic ass, if he heard all this crazy shit you're spewing," Cristina replied drily. "Just tell him that you don't want to go."

"Oh my god, you're right. I need help."

"No kidding."

"I need you to help me think of an out."

Cristina reached for her apple and leaned back in the chair. "You need me to help you think of an out?"

"Yes."

"YOU need ME?"

"Yes!"

"Me? The person you call your best friend. The same person you ditched and left with Barbie and Evil Spawn."

"Yes," replied Meredith, guiltily. "You're my person. You need to help me because you're my person and if the shoe were on the other foot, I would help you."

"See? Now that's where you're wrong because if that were me, I WOULD TELL HIM!" Cristina's loud shrill echoed in the room and made Meredith flinch.

After a long pause, Meredith let out a deep sigh and said, "Fine. I'll tell him, but you'd better have a crap load of tequila ready for when he throws me to the curb."

"I doubt that, but good luck and I'll be at Joe's after work with your poison ready at the waiting."

* * *

_**Six weeks later…**_

"Hello?"

"Joe's. Tonight. 9pm. Don't be late or the first few rounds are on you. On second thought, being a little fashionably late never hurt anyone."

"No. It just leaves a big nasty dent on my nonexistent bank account, that's all."

"What are you complaining about? Your sugar daddy's got deep pockets. He couldn't have spent much on that old tin box of his."

"I love his trailer and I don't care about his money. I don't even know how much he makes."

"Riiight."

"Shut up, you jealous whore!"

"Make me, Suzie homemaker!"

"Bitch!"

"Slut!"

"Surgery skank!"

"Domesticated!"

"Okay, that was fucked up," said Meredith after a long pause.

"I know," replied Cristina.

Meredith could tell her friend probably had the biggest smirk on her face at that moment. "Why are you calling?"

"I told you. Joe's. Tonight."

"And I told you when you asked me this morning, and this afternoon, and once more in the locker room that I can't make it. I have to pack."

"I can't believe you chickened out and didn't tell him."

"I tried, but really good sex always got in the way."

"I hate you. You know that, right?"

"I know," she replied with a satisfied grin on her face. "I'm actually starting to look forward to this trip."

"Wow."

"What?"

"He's really fucked you up with that penis of his. Did I just hear you say you're looking forward to the trip?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Oh I don't know…maybe it has something to do with the constant bitching from you for the past six weeks about how much you dreaded this trip."

"I've decided to turn over a new leaf or whatever the hell that saying goes. We're married and I need to support him. That's what married people do, right? Support each other and stuff."

"You're asking me; your SINGLE friend, because…?"

"Because I need you to convince me that I'm doing the right thing."

"Doing the right thing would be coming to Joe's and keeping me company. I swear I will kill Izzie if I have to listen to any more of her stories about Evil Spawn and how much she loves him."

"Izzie's in love, leave her alone. Love is good. Love is bright and shiny and…it's good."

"Oh, shut up and get your ass down here!"

Meredith surveyed the mess in her room with her clothes strewn all over the floor and bed and after another moment's pause; she said "Be there in fifteen."

* * *

Meredith had a nasty hangover. If the incessant pounding in her head was any indication, she knew this one probably ranked up there as one of the worst hangovers in history. She was lying faced down on her bed, her hair a tangled mess and still dressed in her clothes from the night before. The shoe that was dangling precariously on her right foot slipped onto the floor with a loud thud, startling her into opening her eyes which was a big mistake as it was immediately met with a nasty glare from the sunlight filtering in through the opening of her curtains. 

"Shit!" she grumbled, pulling the pillow over her head.

She had almost fallen back to sleep when she heard the muffled sound of the phone ringing. Grumbling to herself, she pulled the pillow tighter over her head to block out the insistent shrill coming from her nightstand.

_Go away!_

Whoever it was must have gotten the message because the ringing stopped and just in time before the answering machine picked up. Shifting to a more comfortable position, she released a yawn and settled back into bed, prepared to return to her peaceful slumber.

Just then, she was disturbed once more with the sound of the phone ringing. _Argh!_ Doubling up on the pillows, she piled them onto her head and silently pleaded for the obnoxious intruder to stop calling. She mentally counted down the rings, expecting the answering machine to pick up and like clock-work, it did.

"It's me. I'm not home so leave a message." She laid there listening to her familiar greeting.

Beep!

"Mer? I know you're there. I'm on my way over, so get out of bed and get dressed. Our flight is at 10am and we need to get there early to check in. Mer? I'm serious, honey. Get up and get dressed or we're going to be late." There was a short pause before Derek spoke again, his voice cautious. "Are you hung over? Did you go to Joe's last night? You did, didn't you? You promised me you were going to stay in and finish pa—"

Beep!

"Shit!" she quickly bolted upright in bed. She immediately regretted the quick movement because the dull throbbing pain in her head soon felt like someone took a sledge hammer to it and was making her head spin and her stomach nauseous. _Shit! Shit! Shit!_

Looking around her room, she let out another groan when she saw pile upon piles of clothes strewn about her room and an empty suitcase lying open on the floor. She looked at the clock on her nightstand to see that it was 8:15 and quickly scooted off the bed, making a mad dash to the bathroom for a power shower. She purposely left the water on the colder side in hopes that it would wake her hungover ass up.

The shower took longer than she had hoped. All the cold water did was succeed in making her avoid contact, whereby making her really late. She quickly left the bathroom and instead of getting dressed, she began to throw things into her suitcase, stopping every once in a while to actually fold some of the items.

Finishing the zipper to her suitcase, she smiled satisfactorily to herself when she looked at the clock to see that it was 9am. She began to mentally check off the remaining items she needed to do when the doorbell rang.

_Shit!_

Without thinking, she bolted out the door and ran down the stairs, taking two steps at a time. She narrowly missed slipping on her bottom when her damp feet slipped on the wooden steps. She stopped just short of reaching the door and took a much needed deep breath before unlocking it and throwing it open.

"Nice distraction," came Derek's reply when he looked up from his shoes to see her standing there wrapped in nothing but a towel, her damp hair falling around her shoulders.

Still trying to catch her breath, she smirked at him and asked "Did it work?"

"Are you offering?"

"Maybe," she replied, her lips curling into a smile as she gave his immaculately dressed appearance a once-over. "Are you accepting?"

"If we weren't running late for the airport, I would be ravishing you on the floor instead of having this very frustrating conversation that will lead to no sex, so I'm going to take a rain check."

"Who says it will be on offer later?" she teased before stepping back to let him in.

"Me!" He tried to grab her towel, but Meredith was quick on her feet and sprinted upstairs, being sure to drop the towel as she ran.

At the sight of her naked backside retreating from him, Derek quickened his pace and ran after her. "Tease!"

Meredith's giggles could be heard at the top of the stairs as she tried to shut the door before Derek got there. There was a loud thud as the door crashed open.

"Derek, stop! I'm ticklish!" she shrieked amidst fits of laughter.

"I just want a kiss from my wife!" replied Derek as he pulled her naked body into his hard frame.

"Stop," she said before reaching up to pull his lips down to her hungry ones. "Oh god…um…we can't…we shouldn't…," her voice trailed when his skillful hands began to roam across her body, eliciting a moan from her.

"Five minutes."

"You know it's never five minutes when we get started and…," she gulped, trying to think straight. Gathering all her strength, she pushed him away.

"What was that for?"

"Your family. Airport. Extremely late. Remember?"

"Spoilsport!"

"Get out and let me get dressed in peace."

Derek stuck his tongue out at her before bending down to pick up her luggage.

* * *

Taking one last look at herself in the mirror, Meredith smiled nervously as she fidgeted with a stray hair. Today was the day she was going to meet Derek's family. She had spent the last six weeks mentally preparing herself for this moment and convinced herself she was okay with it, but now that that day has arrived, she was a pile of nerves. 

She heard Derek call for her from the base of the stairs to tell her that the driver was waiting to take them to the airport.

"Are you ready, honey?" he called up when he didn't see or hear her coming.

Meredith moved back from the mirror and ran to her nightstand where she stuffed a small box into her bag and called down. "I'm coming!"

_Here goes nothing._


	37. Chapter 37

Meredith yawned and sat up, stretching her legs and arms. She looked over to see Derek watching her curiously.

As soon as they got settled into their seats in first class, she laid her head down on Derek's shoulders and fell asleep, making him promise to wake her up after an hour.

"How long have I been asleep?"

"Four hours."

"Four hours?! Why didn't you wake me sooner?"

"You looked tired. I assumed you didn't get much sleep after your night out with Cristina."

"How did you—?" She started to question him, then gave up when she saw the knowing grin on his face. "I needed some stress relief and Cristina threatened to hurt me if I didn't go."

"If you wanted stress relief, I would've been more than happy to—ouch!"

"I didn't mean THAT kind of relief." She hit him on the arm.

"Hey!" He grabbed her arm before she slapped him again. "I was just kidding. I know you've been worried about this trip and let's face it, a weekend with my family is enough to drive anyone to a drinking binge."

"Not helping with the stress thing." She gave him a worried look.

Derek's laughter rang in her ears as he pulled her in close. "Come here. I'm kidding with you. My family is great, except maybe for Nancy, but you can ignore her like the rest of us do."

"I can't ignore your sister! She's going to hate me."

"Relax. They're going to love you. How can they not?"

"I can think of a hundred reasons."

"And I can think of a million reasons why they will."

Meredith looked at him then and her heart skipped a beat at how handsome he looked, gazing at her with so much love in his eyes. She leaned in to give him a quick kiss, but Derek captured her lips before she pulled away and deepened the kiss. She moved the hand that was laced with his away and reached up to run her fingers through his hair, pulling his head down. "I love you," she whispered against his lips.

"I love you too."

Her tongue slipped out between her parted lips and ran across the soft contours of his before dipping inside to mate with his. Derek released a soft moan and opened his mouth to allow hers access as she did the same. Her hand wandered down across his shoulder blades to his chest where she was about to slip it inside his shirt before they were interrupted by a soft cough.

Breaking the kiss, they looked up to see a very red-faced flight attendant looking at them. Meredith felt her entire body grow warm as she blushed to a color as equally red as the attendant's cheeks. Derek had a frustrated look on his face that Meredith would've found rather amusing under different circumstances.

"I…uh…I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need to take your order for dinner."

They gave the attendant the order and no sooner had she written it down did she leave in a bit of a hurry.

"Betcha wished you had taken me up on that offer," he winked at her.

"What offer?"

"You. Me. And the amazing sex at your house."

"Five minutes of hurried sex? No thank you," she grinned at the look on his face.

"Hurried? No. Frenzied, hot, pleasurable? Most definitely," he answered cockily, raising a suggestive brow at her.

"So you think," she retorted, trying not to smile at his arrogance.

She knew that he knew their sex is always amazing. They've had many frenzied, hot, pleasurable encounters in the hospital on-call and exam rooms to know that those fleeting moments were the best. The risk of being caught only intensified their need, culminating into multiple explosive orgasms. Given how vocal Meredith has a tendency to be at the peak of her orgasms, it's a wonder they haven't been caught in an uncompromising situations yet.

"Cocky."

"Is it that obvious?" he asked looking down at his pants.

"That's not what I was—oh my god, Derek! Can you please put it away or hide it somehow?" she whispered, being careful not to attract attention.

"I can't help it. All this talk about hot sex and the kiss and…just sitting next to you is making me horny."

"Shh!" she hissed. She looked down to see his obvious bulge still straining against his pants and threw her jacket and arm across his lap as the flight attendant walked on by.

"Uh, Mer? This isn't helping."

"I'm trying to make it go away," she whispered frantically.

"Believe me, Mer. You touching me like that is NOT making it go away."

"You're incorrigible!"

"I'm horny!" He leaned close to her ear and whispered. "Let's join the club."

"Club?" she asked, raising a curious brow at him. She pulled back when she realized what he was talking about. "Nuh-uh. No way. Nope. We're two hours from seeing your parents and I don't want to be flashing a "just had sex on the plane with your properly raised son" written all over my face as their first impression."

"They won't know."

"I'LL know! So, no sex until we get back home."

"No sex?! Mer…," he whined. "I need sex. Two days without it will surely kill me."

"No."

"Please?"

"NO!"

"Pretty please with me on top?" he begged, pouting his lips for more affect.

As hard as she tried, she couldn't help but smile at his silliness and after a moment's pause, she said "Fine. Meet me in there in ten minutes and NOT a minute sooner."

With that, she stood up and pretended to straighten her clothes before she casually walked into the restroom.

* * *

Derek did what Meredith asked and waited ten minutes before he casually got up in his seat and walked to the lavatory. The flight attendant from earlier gave him an odd quizzical look, but he ignored it and gave her his best dreamy smile which worked because she blushed and rushed away to tend to anther patron.

He held his hand up, ready to knock when the door slid open and he was forcefully pulled inside.

"What the hell took you so long?" Meredith asked her voice breathless from the way their bodies collided in the small confined space.

"You told me to wait ten minutes," he replied, his voice equally breathless from the impact, not to mention the shock of being hauled into the room by someone as small as Meredith.

"I didn't think you'd actually wait," she said, her fingers fumbling with his belt.

"What are you doing?"

"Undressing you."

"Okay," he said tentatively, raising his hands up to give her room since it was really cramped. He didn't realize that space would be such an issue.

"I, uh…I've never—"

"You've never what?" she stopped what she was doing to look up at him, her eyes questioning. "Oh my god, you've never?"

"Well, no…not exactly."

Meredith had to bite down on her lips to keep from laughing. "Wait. You were the one who suggested airplane sex, but you've never actually done it before?"

"No," he confessed, his cheeks flushed. "Addison wasn't really into that kind of stuff."

"She didn't like sex?" Meredith asked, her curiosity getting the better of her.

"Oh no, she liked sex. She liked it a lot," he remembered. "We've done it in the shower, the living room, the kitchen, of course the bedroom. We even did it in Central Park one crazy night, but we've never—"

"Okay!" she snapped, cutting him off in mid-sentence. "Now is really not a good time to be telling your current wife of all the places you used to have sex with your **ex** wife," she emphasized. "Not good for my ego, Derek. Not good at all."

"Right. Sorry." He looked at her apologetically. "So how do we do this? I mean, it's kind of small in here. Should I move over there? Or will it be better if I stood here?" Meredith watched in amusement as he tried different positions. "How about if I lift this over here? Wait, my arm is a little cramped."

"Derek!"

"What?"

"We don't have all year."

"Right."

Her hands shot back out and with deft fingers, she removed his belt, undid the zipper and let his pants fall down to pool around his ankles. She hitched up the skirt to her dress and raised herself to sit on the small sink, facing him. Derek watched with pure desire when she manipulated her legs around the small space and he somehow found himself snugly positioned between her legs. He could see that her panties were damp through the dark silk fabric. She opened her legs more to accommodate his frame and leaned back against the mirror. Her eyes turned a dark, smoky green and her lips parted slightly on a breathless sigh.

Derek watched the wanton way her body swayed, her breasts jutting out against the thin silky fabric. He could see the faint outline of her perfect breasts, her nipples hardened to taut peaks. The heady scent of her arousal mixed with his thrilled and intoxicated their senses and in seconds their lips crashed together in a heated kiss, each demanding and seeking to fulfill their hunger.

Their mouths were fused together, their kiss deepening as the urgency of their need consumed them. Derek reached his hand down and pushed her panties aside as his fingers swept up and down her wet, plump folds, teasing it.

"Oh god," Meredith moaned when his fingers slipped inside, but not going as deep as she wanted. She tried to move her hips, to encourage his fingers to go deeper, but his other hand held her still as he continued to lavish her with attention. The pad of this thumb teased and rubbed her clit, making her moan into his mouth.

"Derek," she moaned. "Please…honey…oh god, I need you inside me now. There's no time and I really can't wait."

"But we haven't—," he protested, knowing how she favors foreplay and wanting to please her as much as he could for as long as he could.

"I know, but seriously, I just need you inside me now. Please…"

Her pleas did him in and he immediately released her and grabbed her firmly by her shoulders as he thrust hard and deep into her welcoming warmth. "Oh my g—" Derek's lips clamped down on hers in a searing kiss to stop her from screaming. He knew they were playing with fire by having sex on a plane full of people and he was not about to risk being caught. Not now when they're so close to reaching their climax.

Meredith broke the kiss; their faces were millimeters apart as they stared deep into each other's eyes while he thrust into her, each driving force bringing her closer to her climax. She could feel her muscles contract around him, threatening to collapse altogether as he continued his pleasurable assault on her sensitized flesh.

Meredith's orgasm washed over her in wave after wave of heated pleasure as she bit down on her lips to keep from screaming. Each driving force of his thick manhood touched and teased her g-spot as he pumped into her with slow purposeful strokes, then quickening to a driving force that kept her breathless as she tried to keep up with him.

Her head fell back against the mirror as her orgasm subsided and before she could register what was happening, Derek had moved her off the counter and turned her around to face the mirror. With heavy-lidded eyes, she looked into the mirror and saw for the first time, how she looked from the aftermath of an orgasm and that aroused her all over again. She looked past to see Derek watching her with desire filled eyes as he smiled lovingly at her.

"What are you doing?" she asked, half teasing as he grabbed her hands and spread them on either side of the counter.

He bent her slightly forward and leaned down to kiss the nape of her neck. She moaned and her legs almost gave out when she felt his hardened penis push up against her buttocks. Derek released her hand and reached down to grab his penis as he teased her with long sweeping strokes across her lips. She pushed her buttocks back against him, her lips gyrating in circles around his hardened shaft, seeking fulfillment. Derek pulled back and leaned down to kiss her bare back as he nipped and licked her sweat-slicked skin.

She tried to turn around, but his other free hand reached around and pressed her back against him, effectively holding her still. She stood back up and reached her hands over her shoulders to his hair where she grabbed fistfuls and tugged on the silken strands until he whimpered in pain. She was playing with fire by doing that for it spurred him on even more. He released his throbbing penis and reached up to free her hands from his as he pulled them forward to splay palms flat on the mirror high above her head on either side.

She loved it when he took control and he was definitely in control of the situation as his hands held hers still. She turned her head to the side and their lips crashed together as he kissed her deeply and with so much love that it scorched her senses. His tongue darted inside to seek hers and soon became entangled in an erotic dance, each licking and sucking until it left them breathless. Meredith felt his hardened shaft at the juncture of her thighs and screamed his name into her mouth when he pierced her body in one long, deep, powerful thrust that she thought surely rattled the mirror.

Together, their bodies moved in a lover's dance that was theirs and theirs alone. The love they felt for each other, provided a blanket of warmth as they sought to fulfill the need that only they could provide one another. Derek released her hands to wrap them around her waist as he held her close while he continued to thrust into her. Meredith brought her hands around back to wrap around his heck as she held him close as they climaxed together.


	38. Chapter 38

**Thank you so much for all the wonderful comments.**

* * *

"She's looking at us." Meredith whispered into Derek's ear as the flight attendant walked by. 

"No, she's not."

"She just looked at me again."

"She's not looking at you. She's looking at me."

"Your eyes are closed. How do you know she's looking at you?"

"Because I'm hot and she wants me."

"Arrogant much?"

"You like it when I'm arrogant," he smirked, opening his eyes to wink at her.

Meredith wanted to smack him on the head, but he did speak the truth. His arrogance annoys her to no end, but she loves the control that is borne out of that arrogance.

"She knows."

"So what?"

"So…she knows."

"Mer," he said, straightening in his seat to look at her. "I don't care if everyone on the plane knows that you and I had amazing sex a while ago. You're my wife. I'm your husband. We're married and that's what married people do."

"We don't look married, Derek. Our last names aren't even the same," she reminded him.

Derek shook his head in defeat and reached inside his pant pocket. "Give me your hand."

"Why?" she asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

"Give me your hand," he repeated.

"Not until you tell me why," she continued to stubbornly resist.

"I must really love you to…," he muttered to himself as he tugged on her reluctant fingers.

Meredith tried to pull her hand away, but stopped resisting when he pulled out a small black velvet box. Her mouth was agape as her eyes darted eagerly from the box to Derek's face, then back to the box.

"I was going to wait and do this with my family around, but now seemed like as good a time as any to show you how much you mean to me." He flipped the box open and Meredith's eyes widened in shock when she saw the most beautiful diamond ring nestled between the small velvet slit.

"Oh my god, Derek…," she whispered, her eyes teary as her body was wracked with emotion.

"Meredith Grey, you have bewitched me from the first moment I laid eyes on you and have held me captive to your love, beauty, and inner strength ever since," began Derek, his voice cracking from the overwhelming emotion that shook him to the core. "Before I met you, I was lost in a deep abyss of unhappiness – an empty shell of a person that was not worthy of anything. These past few months have been the happiest I've ever been and that's all because of you. We've had some tough times and it was during those times that I found myself needing you by my side more than I needed air to breathe. I almost lost you once and that is something I vow never to let happen again. You're my wife, my lover, my confidant – all the things I hold close to my heart. You've made me complete again and I love you so much. Please take this ring as a symbol of my undying love and devotion to you."

For the first time in a really long time, Meredith was completely and utterly speechless. This was all so unbelievably unexpected and now as she sat staring at the ring before her, she was at a lost for words. Derek threw her for six with his wonderful speech. His words swam in her head and made her mind fuzzy to all that was going on. She felt her hand lift, in slow motion, toward Derek and watched in a magical trance when he slipped the ring onto her wedding finger. It was a perfect fit.

"Derek, I don't know what to say."

"Say you love me and promise to spend the rest of your life with me."

"I…," she stuttered before she pulled her hand away and turned her back to him.

"Meredith? What are you—?"

"Hold that thought," she said over her shoulder as she reached inside her bag, obviously searching for something.

Her actions made Derek nervous. He was certain she would love the ring. He had practiced the speech over and over again in his head and even went so far as to imagine how she would react. Never in his mind did he envision her pulling away from him and now he felt nauseous as the unease settled into the pit of his stomach.

Just then, she whipped her head around and held her small hand out to reveal a small box.

"What's this?"

She held the box closer to him and said, "Open it."

Derek shifted in his seat to face her and tentatively reached for the box. The nervousness and excitement swirled in his head as he opened the box.

"When? How?," he asked, his eyes teary as he look up at her.

"A month ago. Do you remember that night I couldn't join you for the Attending's annual dinner?"

"Yeah," he said, remembering the argument they had. He had been angry with her because he thought she didn't want people to know that they were married and his frustration got the better of him. It was bad enough that she had made him promise to keep their relationship professional at the hospital, but the dinner was his chance to socialize with his fellow colleagues and he wanted to show off his beautiful wife. He was proud to call him his wife and he wanted everyone to know it.

"That was the only night the jeweler was available since he was going out of town for two months. I knew the dinner was important to you and I really wanted to go, but this…" she gestured to the ring, "was more important. There's a message inside."

Derek carefully pulled the ring out and brushed the tears from his eyes as he read the engraving:

_**I'm glad you were there to catch me. I love you. M**_

"I love you," Derek whispered, his voice hoarse as he leaned over to give her a kiss that was filled with so much love and passion.

"You're going to be great. My family will love you just like I do," Derek said as he wrapped his arms around her slim body while they stood pressed against the passenger door. "C'mon baby, let go of the door."

"No."

"Meredith."

"I can't do this, Derek. I thought I could, but now…I…I just can't."

It had been fifteen minutes since they arrived at the vast estate home and the nervousness that Meredith had worked so hard to control since she blindly agreed to come with him came crashing down into a tumble of nerves when they drove through the heavy wrought iron gates.

Derek tried to keep her mind preoccupied by talking to her on the drive and pointing out various locations he used to hang out during his youth. He had succeeded in putting her mind at ease but that changed immediately when he turn down the long, winding, private road that led to his parent's home. Meredith didn't utter a word of protest as the car slowed to a crawl on the gravel driveway, but the way her body stiffened and her teeth nibbled on her lower lip, he knew.

It took a little bit of persuasion on his part, but when he finally managed to convince her to get out of the car, she held onto the door handle so tight, he was sure she would pop a blood vessel.

"It's only for two days. I promise it will go by so fast, you won't even notice it."

"How many people did you say were coming?" she asked, eyeing the house and thinking it could fit a few hundred people in there.

"Just family and a few of my parent's closest friends. It's a small, private affair," he assured her.

"Two days, right? We're going to be here for two days and then we leave right after, right?" she continued to ask, her fingers getting redder as she tightened her grip on the door handle.

"Two days," he confirmed. "We leave for the airport at noon on Sunday, so really, it's just a day and a half and if you exclude the time we're asleep, it doesn't even amount to a day."

"You're mocking me."

"I'm not mocking you. You're nervous. I get that." He leaned down and kissed her forehead before looking deeply into her eyes. "It will be over before you know it."

"Promise?"

"I promise, now can we please go inside before my family sends out a search party for us?"

"They…they would do that?" she asked, thinking how Ellis wouldn't have cared if she'd gone missing.

"I was joking, Mer."

"Oh."

"Are you ready?" he asked, his hands gently prying her fingers away from the door.

"Ready."

"You're going to need to loosen your grip a little," he smirked when her fingers were unyielding to his hand as they gently pulled.

"Here goes nothing," she said with a deep sigh before she released her numb fingers to lace together with his.

"I love you," he whispered into her ear. "Just remember that and we'll do fine." The smile and wink he gave her made her heart melt and putting on the biggest smile she could muster, she let him take the lead as they walked into the house.


	39. Chapter 39

I've been working on this update for the last couple of days and I really hope you liked it as much as I enjoyed writing it. The flashbacks are written in italics.

Thank you for all the nice comments!

* * *

Soft rays of sunlight filtered through the translucent curtains to land in a golden halo around the solitary figure as she stood in the corner, quietly observing the bustling activity outside. The loud noise was a complete contrast to the calmness of the room she was occupying as she continued to watch, her mind caught up on what had become of her life.

She was stirred from her thoughts by a soft rap on the door.

"Come in," her voice was hoarse, her throat dry.

It took a few seconds before the door opened and Cristina slipped inside, the worry lines clearly etched on her face.

"I know we've talked about this before, but I have to ask again —"

"Cristina," Meredith interrupted with an exasperated sigh. She knew what her friend was going to say. She knew that she was going to try to talk her out of going forward with her plan, but she'd made up her mind long ago and nothing was going to stop her. Even if she did want to back out, it was too late. Far too late.

"Are you ready?"

"Can…can I have a few minutes to myself?" She asked, her voice slightly shaken.

"Yeah, of course," Cristina said before she quietly slipped out of the room.

She waited until the door closed before she returned her gaze to the window. She couldn't believe that nine months had passed since had woken up in a stranger's hotel room to discover that not only had she had the best sexual experience of her life, but that she had married the man responsible for said experience in a cloudy, reckless, drunken haze. She had never expected to see him again when she stormed out of his life, leaving nothing but a cryptic note behind. Fate; however, had other plans and four weeks after that disastrous incident, she had unwittingly walked into a room and had her life turned upside down when it was revealed that her husband was none other than her new boss.

From that day, he chased, she avoided, they argued, had amazing sex, argued some more, threatened divorce, had more sex, reconciled, and somehow in the midst of all the craziness had fallen madly and deeply in love.

People didn't think they would last – namely her and Cristina – and despite all that, they boarded a plane and headed home to meet his family. Nothing screamed commitment more than someone who was a self-proclaimed commitment-phobe to take the ultimate leap and do the unthinkable. She took a leap of faith that day and now here she stands alone, six months later, reflecting on her life.

"_Meredith! What happened, dear? Why are you crying?" Kate Shepherd rushed to her side when she saw a distraught Meredith ascend the stairs and rushed into her bedroom._

"_I…I need…I can't…," Meredith hiccupped, gasping to get air into her lungs. She let out a heavy sigh as she frantically wiped away the tears that were streaming down her face. "I need to leave."_

"_Leave?" Kate asked, concern etched on her face. "You just got here. What do you mean you need to leave? Where's Derek?"_

"_He…Addison…she…they…," Meredith struggled to get the words out, a fresh wave of tears threatening to fall at the memory of what she saw._

"_Calm down, dear." Kate soothed. "Here," she wrapped her arms around Meredith's trembling frame and guided her over to the ottoman where they both sat down. She carefully removed her arm from Meredith's shoulder and placed a comforting hand over Meredith's shaking ones, giving it a light squeeze. "Tell me what happened. What did my son do to make you so upset?"_

The memories of that day came rushing back while she continued to stare out the window. The images still vivid in her mind as she recalled the reaction of Derek's family – or rather, one person in particular – when he introduced her as his wife. There had been an audible collective gasp from his parents and siblings, but their reaction paled in comparison to the outburst that came from Derek's eldest sister.

"_Why is she here?" Nancy asked with bitter disdain as she tossed Meredith an unwelcoming glare. "She doesn't belong here."_

"_Be careful, Nance," Derek warned. "This is my wife you're talking about and I will not have you disrespecting her like that."_

"_You two may be married, but she doesn't know anything about you and you don't know anything about her."_

"_I know that I love her and she loves me and that's all that matters."_

If she thought that hearing Nancy's opinion – albeit premature and unfounded – were a blow to her already fragile state of mind, she was sadly mistaken. The big bruising blow came in the form of a stunning redhead when it was revealed that Derek's ex-wife, Addison, was also in attendance at the party.

A shiver ran up the length of her spine, similar to the one that struck her that day when Addison, in all her glory, walked up to her and introduced herself as Derek's wife. The argument that ensued, between brother and sister, still rang loud and clear in her head. Meredith recalled the awkwardness that washed over her as she was forced to stand amongst strangers while they argued in private. The problem with yelling was that it could be heard through heavy library walls and that was what had happened.

"_Addison loves you. What this girl feels for you is not love. She's infatuated with you and your financial status, that's all," Nancy argued. "Addison knows you and loves you for who you are. How could you give up on a seven year marriage for a fling?"_

"_You don't know what you're talking about."_

"_I do, little brother. You got too busy with your career and too lazy to work at your marriage. Addison was there for you every step of the way. She supported you and loved you unconditionally."_

"_She loved me unconditionally?! Really?!!" he hissed, his anger barely contained. "Was her love unconditional when she decided to fuck my best friend in my bed? Was it unconditional when she carried on with the affair for months behind my back? Was it unconditional when she divorced me to be with him? Was it?!!"_

_Silence._

"_Tell me, Nance, because I'd really like to know!" he yelled._

"_She told me you left —"_

"_Shut up! I'm sick of your shit. You have been nothing but rude to Meredith ever since she arrived and she has done nothing to you. You insult me and mom and dad by bringing Addison here and I will not stand here and allow you to insult my wife. I do not have to explain to you or anyone my relationship with Meredith. The bottom line is that she loves me and makes me happy, which is something I haven't felt in years!"_

Needless to say that Addison was no longer welcomed after that admission of the truth, but that didn't stop her from trying to do what she came to do. Meredith laughed bitterly to herself as she recalled the irony of it all.

_At Meredith's insistence, Derek helped carry Addison's luggage to her waiting car. He had resisted when, much to the surprise of everyone in the room, Meredith made the suggestion. Everyone had expected her to be upset and to some degree, she had been, but what purpose would it have served to further humiliate Addison by offering no help when she clearly needed it._

_By the time Addison was ready to leave, everyone had gone about their separate ways to prepare for the party that evening. Nancy had apologized profusely and offered to help Meredith get settled into their room. Unpacking their things didn't take long since they had only planned for two days and after thanking Nancy for her kindness, Meredith descended the steps on her way to the kitchen to grab herself something to drink. She didn't make it further than the family room when what she saw outside the window, stopped her dead in her tracks._

Six months. Six months had passed and remnants of the feelings of betrayal, anger and loss she felt that day still sent a chill coursing up her spine.

"_You bastard!"_

"_Please, listen to me." Derek begged, his hand reaching for her to keep her from running away. "Please let me explain."_

"_Explain what?" Meredith yelled, her chest heaving with anger. "Every time I turn my head, I see you kissing another woman! First it was Dani and now Addison?"_

"Mer?"

Meredith turned her head to see Cristina standing there. She had been so lost in her thoughts; she didn't hear anyone come in.

"If you're going to do this, we really need to get going."

"Yeah…okay," she whispered as she gathered her stuff and followed Cristina out the door.

"_I did NOT kiss Addison," he denied. "She kissed ME! She caught me by surprise. I swear to you, I did not kiss her. I love YOU, don't you see that? I know I hurt you when I kissed Dani and seeing you in pain nearly killed me and I swore I would never do it again. I'd die before I ever let that happen. Please believe me."_

"_I don't know if I can," she whispered, ignoring the stream of tears that ran down her cheeks as she turned and ran into the house and up the stairs._

Meredith couldn't control the rush of tears that streamed down her cheeks as they walked towards their destination. She vowed she wasn't going to cry, today of all days, but remembering the pains of the past as well as the emotions of the present became too much for her to endure.

"We can still stop this," Cristina whispered when she saw the tears.

"No we can't and we won't." Meredith whispered back. "I'm doing this and I need you to support me."

"Okay, but don't say that I didn't try."

"I know and thank you. Now let go of my arm," she softly commanded of her friend.

The lights were blinding as she stood, staring into a sea of blue. Her nerves were teetering and her legs wanted to give out, but the hands that held onto hers provided all the warmth and comfort she needed to keep her feeling safe, protected and loved.

"You look beautiful," he whispered softly in her ear as they turned towards their future.

"We are gathered here today to re-join this man and this woman in holy matrimony…"

**THE END**

* * *

This is the second story that I stuck with from beginning to end (with the exception of the two oneshots), and as hard as it was for me to write the end, I felt as though this was the perfect place to end it. I know many of you would've liked to see Meredith's interaction with Derek's family and maybe a glimpse into their life as a married couple, but I didn't want to draw out their story longer than was necessary to get them to a place of happiness.

With this update, I tried a different method today, which was to incorporate the past and present together and I hope that it left you intrigued and ultimately happy at the end.

I hadn't planned on the update being as intense as it was and it just sort of fell into that mode as I continued to write and incorporate the flashbacks, which I think you will all agree was rather painful to read. It was hard to write, so I can imagine it must've been a little hard to read.

The end may have been a little cheesy, but I'm a HUGE sucker for Mer/Der happiness, so naturally I want to end on a happy note.

For those interested in reading my other fics that are not posted here, please email me and I will send you the link to the Grey's McBoard Fanfic site.

**Breathless** – This is a fic that I'm co-writing with the wonderfully talented Lolo (Dark N Twisty Lorena).

**My Sweet Addiction** – A Dempeo fic.

**Perfect Strangers** – A Halloween oneshot.

Thank you for your love and support

Suzie


End file.
